Sparks
by DelicatelyDark
Summary: Life's hard. Clary knows it as a fact, and it's not getting any better as far as she could tell. Try as she might to make things work out, the happiness seems to be totally denied from her, but there is a one person who refuses to think her game is over, and along with him- happiness find its way into her life. (Mental illnesses, self harm, alcohol, sex... You have been warned)
1. Spark of Gold

Birds are singing, sun is peeking through the clouds and so on.. Seems like great morning all in all, but Clary didn't feel particurlaly excited about all good omens that were promising for good day.

"_Wake up Clary. Clary! Come on now honey, we have to go." Gentle voice was whispering to her ear through her sleepy, clouded mind. _

_Her mother's voice. _

_Clary made sleepy whining noise and rolled over to her side, pulling blanket over her head. _

_"Oh Clary, now is not the time for that." Her mothers voice said gently, sounding slightly amused as blanket was pulled off of her. _

_Clary curled up into a ball to stay warm, "Just a little longer mommy." _

_"Not now. I promise you can sleep longer tomorrow morning." _

_Clary sit up, rubbing her sleepy eyes, "You promise?" _

_Jocelyn smiled down to her, "I promise. Come now, I have made you breakfast ready, we have an hour and then we must go." _

_"Okay." Clary climbed out of her bed and followed her mother to kitchen. _

_While Clary was eating her breakfast, she watched as her mother got ready for some obviously important meeting. Jocelyn added makeup on her face only when she was going either to party, or to somewhere important place._

_Knock in front door told them that Luke, Jocelyn's old friend and Clary's godfather, was there. _

_Clary skipped to open the door, hugging Luke but Luke only patted her shoulder and went to Jocelyn. _

_Clary frowned. She didn't understand why Luke was so tense, and why no one told her what so important was happening. _

_"Mommy? What's going on?" _

_"Nothing sweetie, go brush your teeth and get changed now. I left you your clothes to chair in your room." _

_"But mom-?" _

_"Go now." _

_Clary sighed and left. When she came from bathroom to find her mother, to show how white her teeth were now, she only found Luke from living room, watching television. _

_"Where's mommy?" Clary asked. _

_"She had to hurry, I will be here with you until she comes back." Luke had answered with faint smile. _

_But Clary's mother had not come back. _

_Being five years old, Clary had not understood why her mommy would leave her, and growing up, she cared less and less to find out. _

Now, 15 years later, Clary still sometimes felt aching squeeze in her chest when she thought about her mother. She had loved and admired her mother so much. Luke had never told her if he knew anything about Jocelyns disppearence, and even Clary moved to live with him and was raised up by him, he never mentioned her mother again.

But Clary could swear she saw a hint of sadness in Luke's eyes whenever Jocelyns name came up. Probably he was hoping her return as well even he didn't say it.

Their life had not been anyhow particurlaly great, Luke having to work every day in his small bookstore to have enough money for their living, but she was thankful for everything he did for her.

At the moment, Clary worked in bookshop during weekends to give Luke some free time, and also to gather some money of her own. She lived on her own, not very far from Luke's house, but even all her money went to the rent of her apartment, she didn't dare to ask anything else from Luke.

So here she was, sitting at her kitchen counter with cup of black coffee in her hand since she didn't have money to get milk. Coffee and art suplies were always her number one in list when she made shopping list what she needed from store.

Her stomach grumbled and she sipped her coffee again. It was getting cold, so she reached for the coffee machine and poured more hot coffee in her cup.

She had wished to find a job where she could get more money from, but so far no luck, and she was losing her hope.

Everything always failed for her. Small fading scars along her arms and wrists spoke of her hopelessness, but by now she didn't care anymore.

Her phone ringing catched her attention and she jumped off from kitchen counter, locating her old phone from her bedside table.

"Hello?" She answered.

"Clary, I hate to ask you this with so short notice, but could you come for the shop for few hours today?" Luke's voice said from other end of the line.

Clary nodded, even she knew he won't see it. At least she'd have something to do.

"Sure thing. I'll come right over."

"Thank you Clary, you're an angel."

Clary hung up and sipped her coffee few more times before set her empty cup in sink, shutting down her coffee machine and go get her handbag before leaving to the bookstore.

On her way, she accidentally bump into someone's back while she was trying to cover her eyes from sunlight.

"I- I'm sorry." She stuttered, taking only quick look at the person who she had walked on to just to be sure he wasn't hurt, and then she hurried on her way.

"Wait!" She head him call and she froze.

"I.. I'm very sorry.. A-are you alright?" She asked in small voice when the guy walked to catch up with her.

"I'm fine. But you dropped this." He handed her keys to her.

Clary took her keys with shaky hands and dared to peek at the persons face through her lashes.

He was gorgeous. His hair shine in pure gold in sunlight, wind blowing it to his face and he casually pushed his hair back.

He was tall, lean and muscular, and his eyes- Clary almost gasped as she looked up into those unusually golden eyes.

Despite that he was wearing all black, he was definitely not looking like some of those goth-wanna-be's who over do it.

He looked cool, gorgeous and hot. Definitely a guy who would get any girl he wanted.

"Thanks." She muttered in small voice.

He smiled. Oh it was gorgeous smile and Clary felt her cheeks start to burn.

"No problem." He said, obviously noticing her reddish cheeks. "Are you alright?"

"Y-yes.. Thanks." Clary nodded and stuffed her keys in her jeans pocket. "E-excuse me.. I must go."

"Sure."

"Ha-have a nice day sir." After saying this, Clary hurried away without daring to look back, even she could feel him looking after her. She was too embarresed of herself already. Why she hadn't just thanked him and leave? It wasn't that difficult. That's what she always did. How come this guy made her act so stupid? Well, even more stupid than usual.


	2. Spark of Kindness

"Clary! There you are." Luke's voice sound tense but releaved to see her.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! There's awfully a lot of people out there now and I didn't want to knock anyone over while running here. I already bumped into someone... Luckily no body got hurt." Clary said and left her handbag and jacket to Lukes apartment before going to the bookstore.

"I will be back in few hours. Call me if you need anything." Luke said and Clary just nodded, watching him go.

When Lukes car drove away from her sight, she turned away from window and looked around small bookstore.

Dust. That there was if nothing else. Thankfully for something to keep herself busy- she go to bathroom and took small hand towel, getting wet before going back to store area and started wiping the dust from tables and bookshelfs.

Ringing of small bell by the door told her that someone entered the store and put her towel away.

"Hello. Can I help you?" She asked from black haired boy with baby blue eyes who was scanning his surroundings.

"Yeah.. I'm looking for any comic books for my kid brother. His birthday is tomorrow and he likes comic books more than anything."

Clary nodded, "We have some over here." She lead him to collection of comic books they had in store.

The guy nodded and Clary left back to dusting. "Call me if you need anything."

She knew how irritating it could be when someone was practically breathing into your neck while you were trying to look at something, so she gave him some space without leaving out of sight in case if he needed her help.

"I think I found what I was looking for." He said, holding couple comic books in his hand.

"Would you like me to wrap them up in giftpaper? It doesn't cost anything."

The guy seemed purely thankful, "That would be great, thank you."

Clary nodded again and went to check what kind of papers they had left.

"Silver with black tribal prints or red with teddy bear pictures?"

"Teddybears will be fine. He's just turning seven"

Clary smiled and took out giftpaper.

She took pricetags from books and wrapped them up.

"You're good at that. My sister Isabelle, she makes it such a mess when she's wrapping gifts."

Clary shrugged, "I've been taught well then I guess. I've been working here for long time."

The guy nodded, his phone ringing before he could answer to her.

"Sorry.. " He said to Clary who just nodded. She could wait. There wasn't any other costumers at the moment either, so it wasn't a problem that he took his time.

"Jace? Where are you?"

Clary heard a male voice through his phone. Well of course- Jace hardly is womans name.

"I'm at the bookstore now, I got the comics for Max... Okay, I wait you here."

He put his phone away and looked at Clary, "How much?"

"10€"

"Here you go." He handed her 20 and she took out 10 to give it back to him.

He took the money and the books, stopping then and handed Clary few coins.

Clary looked puzzled and he smiled, "A tip. For you."

Clary blushed slightly, taking the coins from him thankfully. He didn't know how much she really needed every penny she could get.

"Thank you."

"You welcome. Do you mind if I hang around here for while? I promised to wait my brother here."

Clary nodded, put her precious coins in her jeans pocket and took the towel again to keep dusting.

"I haven't seen you here before." The guy said, casually killing time by chatting with her.

"Yeah- uhm.. I- I work part-time."

She could feel his baby blue eyes scanning her, "Are you studying something while you're not working here?"

"N-no."

She heard him sigh. It was compassionate sigh. Damn it. Was it that obvious she was poor and miserable.

For her luck, the door opened again and she turned to greet her next costumer, but her words died in her lips.

She just stared in shock.

Right there, at the doorstep of Luke's bookstore stood the same guy she has bumped onto earlier.

"Hey Alec, you ready to go?" He said for black haired boy who just nodded, then he turned to look at Clary, a smile creeping to his face. "Hello to you too."

"H-hey."

Alec patted his shoulder, "Lets go." Then he turned to Clary, "Thanks again."

Clary just nodded.

When door closed behind those two guys, she released the breath she didn't even realize she had been holding.

She sit down and took out the coins she had got. It made 8€ and 40sents in total. She felt tears filling her eyes, she could buy some food now.

The door opened again and she dropped couple coins to the ground, quickly bending down trying to catch them all back together.

"Hey.. Are you alright?"

"Yes.. I- I'm okay. I just d-dropped something." She said, putting her coins in her pocket and wiped her eyes before stood up.

There he was again. The golden boy from the street.

"Would it seem awfully fast forward if I asked you out?" He said.

Clary's jaw dropped, and she stared at him. Actually stared at him. "E-Excuse me?"

He chuckled and held out his hand, "Jace Wayland."

Clary reached out her pale little hand and shook his hand. "I'm Clary."

"Well Clary, when you're free for lunch or dinner or something?"

"Is.. Is this some kind of joke?.. I-it's not funny."

Jace frowned, "No... Is there something to joke about in that a guy meets a girl and finds her cute and want to get to know her better? Look it's fine if you don't want to go for a date, we can hang out as friends. It can't hurt you to have some more friends, right?"

"D-date?!"

Jace held up his hands, "Take it ease Redhead, I got it.. I'm sorry I disturbed you." He lowered his hands and turned to go.

"No! Wait!" Clary called after him.

Jace stopped, turning to look at her.

Her cheeks were shade of dark red and her hands were shaking. He frowned slightly at her nervousness, his eyes softening, waiting for her to speak.

"I.. I'd like to.. Go out sometime." She stuttered.

Jace smiled to her. "If you give me your number, we can agree the time for that later."

She wrote down her number in piece of paper and handed it to him.

Jace took the paper and took hold of her hand- he had strong and warm hands, leaning little closer to her, lowering his voice to a whisper: "Just for the record, you're cute when you blush."

Clarys cheeks burned and she wished she could disappear. She managed to smile at him a little when he waved at her and left.


	3. Spark of Guilt

"Earth to Clary"

Clary blinked, "Yes?"

Luke chuckled, "You're totally in your own little world. Has something happened?"

Clary shook her head and put on her "I'm fine" smile. "Nothing, I'm just thinking."

"What you're thinking?" Luke asked and went to answer the door when doorbell ring.

He had ordered them pizza, partly to thank Clary for coming with so short notice, and partly because he liked to have meals with his god-daughter. Let alone the fact that he had noticed her loosing weight ever since she moved on her own.

Clary chuckled to cover the grumbling noise of her stomach when she smelled food. Good god she was hungry. It had been several days since her last meal.

Luke settled two pizza boxes down to coffee table. "Dig in."

Clary blinked, "Why two? Don't we usually share one?"

"Because- one is for you. You take it home with you so you can eat it later."

Clary couldn't help it. Her eyes were filling with tears and she had to look away from Luke to hide them, but he was already coming around the table and put his warm hands to her shoulders.

"Clary.."

"I'm fine. Really. I'm fine."

"No you're not." Luke said in gentle voice. "Clary I do see that you're feeling bad. I thought to give you some space and test if your own wings would carry you already but I do look after you. And I hoped you would come tell me eventually what's wrong."

A tear rolled down Clary's face. "I'm sorry Luke." She sniffed.

"About what?"

"I disappointed you.. I'm so sorry Luke."

"Hey.. Shh" Luke sighed lightly and pulled his sobbing god-daughter in tight hug. "You haven't dissapointed me Clary. I'm as proud of you as ever, you have grown to be really strong young woman. I just wish you would come to me if something bothers you. Okay?"

Clary nodded, nuzzling her teary face in Luke's familiar flanel shirt, listening his constant and calm heart beats.

"Okay, lets eat before our pizza gets cold." Luke said and with reassuring smile, Clary nodded and wiped her tears.

Luke ended up giving Clary a full bag of food with her so she wouldn't need to go buy anything. As many times as Clary had said: "Luke, really, you don't have to give anything else." He had pushed her words aside and filled the bag for her before giving her a ride home to make sure she got there safely.

Now she was unpacking her full food bag to her kitchen closets and fridge.

She had bread, butter, cheese, milk, orange juice, few apples and banana's, box of her favorite cookies, coffee and tea, pasta, some chicken nuggets and of course, the pizza Luke had ordered for her.

Tears run down her cheeks when she looked around her kitchen. She wouldn't have to be hungry for few days, but she felt awfully quilty of making Luke give all this to her. She knew he didn't have much money to waste either.

Sneaking one cookie out of the box, she stuffed in her mouth and sobbed. It was good. She put a smile on her face, thanking Luke with her prayers again. Then she went to her small bathroom and peeked at herself from mirror.

Her hair was windblown mess but it was nothing new. Turning her head from side to side she tried to find anything from her features what was it that gave her miserable state away to Luke. She was pale, yes. But she had always been. Redheads burned easily in sun, so she never tanned.

Shaking her head she looked away from mirror and took her clothes off, turning the shower water running.

It took a mmoment till it was warm enough for her to go under the pouring water. She shivered, then the warmth wrapped around her delicate figure and she let out a pleased sigh.

Unpleasant stinging on her left forearm shook her out of her pleased state.

A scratch she had made the other day was still sore, and heat of the water made it sensitive.

She sit down to the floor and took deep breath, biting her lip as she run her nail across the scratch mark over and over again, opening it to drip blood down her arm.

She closed her eyes. There, she had punished herself for causing so much trouble to Luke. Hot water sting and hurt in small wound but she didn't care. In her mind this was only fair. Luke had sacrificed so much for her. She could do this for him.

She knew anyone else would think she was crazy, but for her it was important. She couldn't make sacrifices like Luke did, so she did them on her own way. She needed to do this.

Phone ringing brought her thoughts back in reality and she turned the shower off, wrapping towel aroud herself and went to answer it.

"Hello?"

She was expecting it was Luke, but instead she heard only faintly familiar male voice answering on the other end of the line:

"Clary? Did I woke you?"

Her heart skipped a beat, "Jace?"

"That's me. Can you talk?"

"Sure.."

"You sound tired, I can call you tomorrow if you want."

"No.. I'm good." She bit her lip. She was so nervous she didn't know what to say and thanked god for that he couldn't see her now. Even he wasn't there, only sound of his voice and fact she had nothing else on her but a towel, made her blush.

"Okay, look.. Alec said you work just part time on that bookstore, and my parents are desperately in need for babysitter over summer. Just like- three to five days a week. They'd pay 10€ per hour. That's what we all get when we look after our brother. How does it sound?"

Clary's jaw dropped. Was this guy serious? Had god decided to kick some unfortunate angel down in earth to appear for her in form of a golden boy? Clary shook her head- now that, sounded stupid. She didn't even believe in god that much.

"Clary?" Jace's voice asked from other end of the line. "Are you there?"

"Y-yeah.. I'm here."

"How does it sound?"

"It.. It seems great."

"Are you free tomorrow? I could take you out for lunch and we could stop by to introduce you to my parents and talk about the job for you, if you'd like?"

Clary nodded weakly, then feeling stupid, of course he couldn't see her.

"S-sure."

She could imagine him smiling and she blushed again just by the memory of that gorgeous smile.

"See you tomorrow then? Text me your address, I come pick you up around 12.00 Am"

"Okay."

"Bye then."

"Bye."

After the call was disconnected, she stared at her phone. What the hell just happened?


	4. Spark of Her Darkness

Clary couldn't sleep. She just couldn't. She was terrified and nervous and felt so stupid.

She had made her mind to sent Jace message earliest possible hour when decent people might awake that she was sick and she couldn't meet him and his family.

Yes, she needed money. Yes, every nerve in her body melted when she thought about him... Yes, it all was way too good to be true. This was not meant for her.

Every good little thing in life was followed by tragedy.

6 Am. Clary sit up straight and reached for her phone. It was alright to sent him a message now.

She sit there with her phone in her hand and thought. Hm, what would she say to him exactly?

"I'm sorry Jace, I can't come today. I got terrible stomach ache during the night, must have been something I ate yesterday. See you some other time."

No. That sounded stupid and he would probably think that's her version of explaining hangover.

She cleared the message and tried again.

"Jace, could we arrange this meeting for some other day. Luke needs me in bookstore so-"

She cleared that right away. If Jace would go by the bookstore he would see from large windows that she wasn't there.

Shit. This was awful. Her heartbeats raced and she begin to feel dizzy.

She threw her phone to her bed and went to make some coffee for herself, when she heard her phone beep for sign of new text message.

_Are you awake?_ It said.

Clary blinked. What the hell?

_Yes. Why? _She wrote back.

_I'll be there soon._

Clary's heart stopped. Or at least she thought it stopped.

Jace.

Jace was coming there.

"Oh shit.." Clary sighed and run to her closet, quickly getting dressed for her best black jeans and silvery gray tunic.

Quickly pulling her messy hair in bun and splashing cold water to her face to get refreshing feeling, she stared at herself from mirror.

It'll do. Maybe with bit of luck Jace now realize she's not the kind of girl he'd be interested of.

Willing herself to calm down, clary went to kitchen and took cup of coffee, pouring little milk in it.

She had time to drink her cup empty and fill it again, leaving just enough coffee in pan for one extra cup in case Jace wanted it, until there was knock on her door.

She took deep breath, but did no good. Her heart was beating painfully fast and her hands were sweaty and shaking. This wasn't for her. She was too afraid. She wanted to be left alone.

Backing away from the door as panic took over her while all possible terrible images filled her mind, her vision was getting blurry. She couldn't do this! Who was this guy anyway? Why she had been so stupid she had given her number and her address to stanger. It was alright to meet strangers in Luke's store, Luke was often somewhere near by or at least phonecall away, but this was her home. Her only safeplace from other people.

Helpless whimper escaped her lips. "Go away!"

There was another knock and Jace's voice called for her from other side of the door: "Clary it's me, Jace."

She sobbed, she wanted to see him. She really did. But she couldn't. She couldn't do this. He would just keep her crazy.

"I.. I'm not feeling well!"

She heard him sigh, "Clary? Clary please, let me in."

"What you want from me?!" She screamed helplessly.

There was silence. She couldn't be sure if he had left, she couldn't hear so faint sounds as footsteps through her sobbing.

"Clary?" His voice asked then in low whisper, "Are you alright?"

She took deep shaking breath, "What.. What you w-want from me?"

She heard him sigh, "I want to get to know you Clary. I want to be your friend... Maybe some bastard has scared you before to think that all guys just want something from you- but all I want is to get to know you.. Okay, I thought you're cute, but hey- I have cute friends too. Could you let me in?"

Clary felt stupid to even say it, and she got even more embarressed of herself, but she needed to be sure:

"H-how do I know it's you.. Jace?"

"Do you have security chain on your door?"

Clary blinked, "Yes.."

She heard him chuckle, "I can't get in even if you open the door if you have the chain there. You can take a look. I can't get in."

She got closer to her door and slowly opened the lock, peeking through small crack to see to the hallway.

And there he was, all in black and gold, Jace Wayland himself.

He frowned, "Are you alright?" He asked with low whisper.

She nodded. She was trembling all over, and it took only a moment from Jace to realize she was afraid. She was honestly afraid of him. He held out his hand to her, as if to shake her hand, "I won't hurt you. I promise."

She felt somehow compelled by his workds and slipped her hand under the security chain to touch his hand.

By the moment so utterly lost in his golden eyes, she pulled her hand away, closed the door and removed the chain, opening the door to let him in.

She moved out of the way when he came in, closing the door behind him.

Her eyes scanned him, oh yes, he definitely looked like he was trouble with his leather jacket and tight black jeans. Then something silvery catch her eye. He had chain with him?

Pure panic washed over her. She took few steps back until she was in corner of her room, her coffee cup slipped from her hands, shattering to the ground and hot coffe slashing all over her clothes. She culred up in corner, trying to hide herself, whimpering like lost puppy.

"Clary! Clary, are you alright?"

"Go away!"

"Clary, talk to me.. What's wrong?"

"Don't hurt me.. D-don't.."

Jace froze, speechless. He looked down on himself and then back to her. "Clary.. I won't hurt you. Why you think that? Talk to me.. What scared you?"

"Chains.. No chains.."

"Chai- oh.. Clary that's my key chain." He stepped back to give her space, taking out pile of keys from her poket that was linked into the chain. "Look... It's just key chain. I'll put it away." He clicked it off from his belt and set it down to her bedside table.

Clary kept hugging herself. "I'm sorry.. I'm sorry.."

"Hey.. Hey, Clary, look at me." Jace placed finger under her chin and she felt like compelled to obey this gentle order to look at him.

He was kneeling beside her now, his golden eyes reflecting same concern she had seen in Luke's eyes.. Luke would never hurt her, so maybe..

"I'm sorry." She muttered again.

Jace touched her cheek so lightly she felt it only as a brush of a feather across her face.

She blinked. Her heart beats were calming down and her vision was getting clear.

"Let me help you Clary." His voice was a silent whisper.

Clary stared at him. "Why?"

He got more serious again, "Clary, you sounded like you were going to die for fear if no one will do anything. I couldn't just walk away."

He reach out to take hold of her arms to help her to her feet, but as soon as he touched her, she winced and curled up in tiny ball again, her body shaking and her hands went up to hold her hair like she was afraid he'd pull from it.

Jace had seen people like this before. He knew that reflexes like that were born with traumatic events that would take years to recover from.

He held his hands up, "Okay.. Okay, Clary, look. I'm not gonna hurt you, I promise. And I know- my promise might not mean much to you now, I'm not asking you to trust for it, but please.. Give me a chance. I can help you."

"N-no one can help me." Clary sniffed.

Jace took step back, moving calmly like not wanting to scare a wild animal. He held out his hand for her to offer his help on pulling her to her feet.

She looked at his hand, then up into his eyes. "Why you're doing this?"

Jace smiled. It was gorgeous smile, with softness that she hadn't believed he would possess.

"You know.. When you bumped onto me yesterday, for a moment I was so sure I was hallucinating. That you wasn't there.

You were somehow so- special. So beautiful and so shy, it was unbelievably adorable combination. I wanted to ask your name and if we could meet again sometime but you left so quickly I didn't really have a chance. I don't know why I'm drown to you so much Clary, but I want to be here for you. If you just let me."

Clary didn't know what to say. She stared at him. Openly stared at him for long moment. Then she gathered her courage and swallowed, slowly reaching out her pale hand to his.

His hand was so strong, and warm. She had forgot it already. He pulled her to her feet, but as soon as she was up, she felt light headed and she fainted like damsel in distress into his arms.

Before everything went totally dark, she heard him saying: "I got you.. Don't worry.. I won't let you fall."


	5. Spark of Understanding

_"No! No! Please, stop.. S-stop.." _

_It was useless. Sharp pain in her lower back got unbearably strong when metal chain hit her bare skin. She had quickly learned that the louder she screamed, harder she was going to get hurt. _

_Her hands were tied behind her back with leather belts after her clothes had been teared off and she was thrown to lay down on her stomach against something- she assumed, was a table. _

_She had been stupid, so- so stupid. She had felt restless all day and she had wanted to try break her limits, going out late at night after having couple drinks to gather her bravery. _

_She had met three men, terrifyed of them of course- but one of them seemed to just allure her with his shimmering black eyes. Sebastian- he had said his name was. _

_Silvery blonde hair, strong muscular build and those eyes- mixed with his velvet soft whispers to her ear had made her blindly trust him. He had touched her so gently, promising he would never hurt her, promising he would just help her relax- that he would stop whenever she wanted... All sweet lies. _

_He had offered her drinks, staying sober himself since he was driving a car. Whenever his companions said or did something that made Clary uncomformable, his voice had lowered to growling warning that sent shivers of fear down her spine, but she was so fascinated by him. _

_"Let me drive you home my beauty." He had said. _

_Clary giggled. No one had ever called her beautiful. Well except Luke- but that's because he was her only family. He was bound to try make her feel good about herself. _

_"I live just around the corner silly, I can walk." _

_"But it's not safe to wander around alone so late." _

_His tone had gone to harsh, almost commanding whisper, and she backed away from him. _

_"N-no.. I'll be fine.. I-it was nice meeting you, Sebastian.. I'm gonna go now."_

_He hag gripped her wrist so hard it hurt. "I don't think so." _

_"S-sebastian.. You're hurting me." _

_"I will- hurt you. And you're going to like it." _

_Clary had tried to scream for help, but nobody heard her. He had thrown her to the backseat of his car and drive her somewhere she had no idea where. All she knew was that it was huge house. He was obviously very rich. Then he had tear her clothes off and given her two options- either do it willingly- or to be forced. _

_Neither sounded good for her, but she was so utterly afraid she couldn't speak. Tears run down her cheeks and she was trembling all over. He had taken that as sing to force her, and her hands were tied before she was thrown to lay down on her stomach, him leaning over her to hiss into her ear: "You can scream all you like, nobody will hear you.. And I like screamers."_

_She couldn't breathe. Her heart was beating so fast it hurt, but it didn't hurt as much as sudden pain that strike through her when he forced her legs apart and thrust himself in her. _

_And sure enough, the louder she screamed, more exchited he seemed to get, and when she forced herself to stay quiet, wishing he would get bored with her and let her go, he had taken metal chain and whipped her with it to cause her cry out in pain.. It went on- for hours. Until she had lost her voice for screaming too much, her whole body trembling and aching. He had released her hands, thrown her clothes at her and told her to get out of his sight. She had pulled her clothes on despite that her blood stained her jeans and then she run. Every step had hurt and silent tears were streaming down her cheeks, but she had to get away. _

_It was too early in morning to see anyone driving by, so she had to run back home. Once she had got home, she had secured her door and crawled to her bathroom, leaving her bloody clothes to the floor and stand crying under pouring warm water for hours. She couldn't touch aching sore skin between her legs. Crawling out of the shower she had fallen to her bed, still sobbing even tears didn't come anymore. She had layed there staring at the ceiling until room went dark with sunset. _

Heartbeat..

She heard calm, steady heartbeat. And soft breathing. Then she realized there was strong arms holding her, cradling her like she was a little child.

Her face was wet with tears, and so was the soft material against her cheek.

She blinked her eyes open, "Jace!"

He blinked and looked at her, offering gentle smile. "You're awake.. I already thought I should take you to hospital for check."

He was holding her against his chest. Not with any focing pressure, but gentle- protective manner. She could easily push him away, but she felt oddly calm into his arms. Safe?

She looked up to him, swallowing as she stuttered: "W-why you stayed?"

His expression softened, something flickered in his eyes- sorrow?

"Clary... I've seen this all before. I know how hard trusting others can be.. How hard trusting on anything can be. You're hurt. So, so hurt.. I wish I could take your pain away. I can't.. But I can be here for you, and help you through this. Clary you can't give up yet."

She stared at him. "H-how-?"

He took deep breath. "Because I was once like you."

Pure disbelief washed over her. He's a liar. He must have felt her tense, and see her doubt filled eyes since he sighed again and said: "I- I lost my parents when I was little. I saw how they were murdered.. At first- I was so shocked, and I guess I didn't really even understand what it meant.. So I kind of blocked it from my mind. Then- Lightwoods adopted me. They took me in with such unconditional love I couldn't understand that either.. It all happened so fast for me to process." He paused, swallowing thickly. She could see that this wasn't lie anymore. He was hurting too. Actually- hurting, and she reached out her hand, daring to touch his cheek.

His golden gaze turned to her face and he managed to smile to her- as if to say: "I'm fine."

He too another deep breath, "I- I thought it was wrong.. So wrong. I should have been dead along with my parents.. I got myself in trouble. I got in fights.. Just any trouble that might end up killing me. And every time Lightwoods were there for me, helping me back to my feet, but it didn't take my fear away. The horror of seeing my parents dead.. It hit me so hard. I was safe with Lightwoods but it didn't mean I could trust anyone else.. I asked them to let me get in for all kind of hobbies to learn to fight, to learn to defend myself. That became like obsession to me. I just kept training all the time... I tried to drown my fear in that."

"Did it work?"

He looked at her for a long moment, his voice fading to silent whisper, "No.. It didn't."

Her chest ached and she felt sudden need to wrap her arms around him and hold him tight.

So she did. And he tightened his hold of her gently, burying his face to crook of her neck.

"Clary.."

"Yeah?"

She felt him smile against her skin, "I'm not afraid when I'm with you."

She couldn't help it, she sobbed and held him tighter, tear escaping from corner of her eye.

"I'm not afraid with you either anymore."

Jace had called to his family that they were coming late, and Lightwoods had invited Clary over to have dinner with them.

With Jace's reassurences that she would be safe there- she would be safe with him, she had agreed to go.

Her hands were sweaty and shaking. She wasn't good at meeting new people. She always feared how they would react on her, and she feared of making fool out of herself. Her already low self confidence didn't tolerate much to be damamged more.

Jace handed her a helmet and nodded towards his motorcycle, "Have you ride with these ones before?"

Clary shook her head. Jace smiled to her, putting the helmet on her head and secured it.

"Well, now you will. Just hold on to me tight and you'll be fine."

He sit down on his bike and she hesitantly followed, sliding her arms around his waist. She could feel his tight muscles under his clothes and she blushed.

Jace looked at her over his shoulder, "You're going to have to hold little tighter."

She blushed even more at that, tightening her grip as he drove off.

Clary rested her head against his back, holding on to him tight. After a while she got used to it and she closed her eyes, enjoy the warmth of his body and wind on her face. It felt nice.

When he stopped the bike she blinked her eyes open. They were in front of huge, expensive looking white house.

"Wow..." Clary said without even trying to hide her amazement. This family must be rich.

Jace helped her off of the bike and took her helmet. "Welcome to Lightwood family home."

He took hold of her hand, "Ready to go in?"

She hesitatet a moment. "J-just lets repeat.."

He nodded, "So our parents are Maryse and Robert, Alec- is the guy you met at the store yesterday, his sister is Isabelle but she prefers being called Izzy, and the little kid there, it's Max."

She nodded. She somehow felt better knowing at least something before going into someone's house.

"Good to go?"

She nodded again, "Yeah."

He lead her to front door and they heard already noises from inside, woman's voice yelling: "Max, toys out of kitchen floors! Dinner is almost ready and we're having guest! And Isabelle! Isabelle, come help me with dishes please."

Jace chuckled. "That's Maryse."

Another voice, sounding like typical annoyed teenage girl, answered- obviously passing by the door: "Coming, coming.."

"And that's Izzy." He said opening the door, "I'm here!"

Maryse's voice called from kitchen, "Oh good Jace, you're right in time. Dinner's almost ready. Did your friend come with you?"

"Yeah, she's here." He said, shrugging off his leather jacket, helping Clary out of her jacket then.

Tall, thin woman came to greet them. Her hair as black as her son's that Clary had met yesterday, was in elegant bun, and she had same blue eyes as Alec's.

She hold out her hand with friendly smile on her face, "Hello dear, I'm Maryse Lightwood."

Clary held out her hand shyly and smiled, "I'm Clary.. Nice to meet you ."

Maryse laughed softly. "Please dear, call me Maryse."

"O-okay."

Maryse didn't seem to mind Clary's shyness at all. She treated Clary with friendly warmth as if they had known forever. But then again, this was a woman who had raised Jace most of his life and he had made her seen a lot of things.

Then, next to Maryse came younger woman, with identical long black hair and slim features, but with brown eyes.

"New girlfriend again, Jace?" She asked with teasing tone.

Jace narrowed his eyes, "Always so damn welcoming, aren't you Iz?"

She rolled her shoulders in shrug, "Jesus.. Calm down.. "Then she turned to look at Clary. "Hi. I'm Izzy. And you are?"

"Clary." Clary answered with small voice.

Maryse patted Izzy's arm, "Go get your brothers for dinner."

Izzy rolled her eyes and left.

Maryse indicated Jace and Clary to follow, "Come. Dinner's ready."

Jace followed, stopping as he realized Clary wasn't moving.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Wh-what did she mean? Izzy.. When she-"

"Asked if you were my girlfriend?"

Clary blushed and nodded weakly.

Jace sighed, visibly uncomfortable and run his hand through his hair.

"You remember I told you I got myself in a lot of trouble?"

She nodded.

"I got involved with many girl as well."

Clary opened her mouth to say something, but closed it. Jace leaned closer to her, lowering his voice to a whisper:

"Clary I promised I won't hurt you, and I keep that promise. I will tell you anything you want me to, later. Okay?"

Clary smiled a little. She was terrified of how easily she trusted him, but somehow she just did. And he made her feel less lonely, and more safe than she had been for long time.

"Come on, Maryse gets offended when we don't appear in her dinner table right on time." His tone was light, joking, and she couldn't help but giggle as she nodded and followed him to dining room.

** So, I want to thank everyone for lovely reviews, it makes me feel so great to know you like my story. **

**And if anyone was wondering, I think it didn't come out very clearly yet: **

**Clary's 20,**

**Jace 21,**

**Alec 23,**

**Izzy 18**

**Jace and Alec has already moved on their own, but they do hang around their parents home quite often as you will learn as the story goes on. **

** Thanks again. **

** 'till next time then! **

**Delicately Dark **

** XXX**


	6. Spark of Attraction

"I'm taking Clary home." Jace said, leading Clary to hallway and handed her jacket to her.

"Drive safely!" Maryse said. "And Jace, will you be coming back here or are you going to your own place?"

Jace shrugged his jacket on, "I'm going to my place. I'm coming here tomorrow anyway and I have- things to do for that."

Maryse nodded. Tomorrow was Max's birthday, and Clary could just guess that what Jace had to do for that was to get him a present.

Maryse looked at Clary, "Will you be joining us tomorrow as well? You're more than welcome for Max's party, he likes you so much, I'm sure he would be thrilled if you came."

"Uhm.. Sure. I can come."

"I can come pick you up while I'm coming here." Jace said.

Clary nodded.

Maryse patted her adopted son's arm, "Drive safely."

"Mom, you said it already. We're going to be fine. Good night." Jace said and opened the front door, Clary following him out as she waved for Maryse her byes.

"Your family is nice." She said while Jace handed her helmet.

"Yeah, Lightwoods are idealistic family. Alec, Iz and Max are lucky."

"So are you. They're your family as well."

Jace shrugged, "I just don't feel like I belong to this family. I'm that black sheep that wasn't even born among them."

Clary shook her head, but couldn't argue. She knew that feeling.

So she climbed behind him on his bike and held on to him.

When they stopped in front of the building where she lived, she hopped off and handed the helmet back to him.

"Thanks. For everything today."

Jace nodded, watching her carefully, "Are you gonna be okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine."

Jace got off his bike and came to her, without warning wrapping his arms around her and held her tight.

"J-jace?"

"Thank you Clary."

She blinked, he sounded- desperate?

She rubbed his back gently, "Jace? Are you alright?"

He breathed in the scent of her hair, her skin, squeezing her gently before letting go. "I'm fine."

"Are you?"

He swallowed and nodded then, "Yeah.."

She reached out to touch his cheek, "Don't lie to me Jace."

He blinked his eyes wide, "I don't-"

"Yes you do... You don't have to be strong for me Jace. I don't need you to be strong. I need you to be real."

Jace lookd away, avoiding her gaze.

That only made her want to know more what he was hiding.

"Jace.."

"I should go.. I'll call you in morning about what time I'll pick you up for Max's birthday party."

"Don't you dare turn your back on me now Jace!" Clary shouted and he froze. "You promised you won't hurt me, that you'd be here for me. If you go now- you're liar. And that hurts me."

Jace turned back, taking deep breath. "Fine.. What you want?"

"The truth"

"About what?"

"What's bothering you now?"

Jace sighed, "I'm scared- okay! I'm scared, because I can't handle it if I lose anyone else I care about, and it freaks me out to think something could happen to you. Are you happy now? I'm the pathetic coward. Is that what you wanted to hear?"

Clary blinked, "Jace... "

He shook his head, "I have to go."

Clary gripped his arm to stop him. She could feel his whole body tense, but he didn't move.

"You're not a coward Jace... Look at me."

Slowly, he turned to look at her, and she smiled softly. "You're not a coward... A coward would fear for himself and run away. You fear for my sake.. It doesn't make you coward. It makes you compassionate, and caring."

He moved a lock of her hair behind her ear, touching her cheek gently. She saw him look down to her lips, but her didn't move, and his gaze was back into her eyes before she even knew it. His golden eyes were so intense, it sent shivers down her spine. She felt like he could see right through her.

_Kiss me.. Kiss me Jace.. Just god damn it, kiss me. _

He leaned closer, just a little and her heart started beating faster. He was actually going to kiss her?

She felt hint of annoyance and disappointment when he tilted his head to the side to whisper into her ear: "I'm not compassionate. I'm selfish. And I'm afraid to lose you because I need you."

Her fingers found collar of his jacket, gripping it tightly to keep him close. She didn't want him to go. And craziest idea of all came into her mind. And before she could think it through any better, she said: "Stay here tonight Jace. Stay with me."

"Clary.. I don't kno-"

"I trust you Jace.. Prove me right that I'm safe with you and stay here with me tonight... And you did promise to tell me anything I wanted to know."

She bat her lashes and put on her pleading puppy face look.

He sighed lightly in defeat. "Let me park my bike somewhere out of the way."

She smiled and nodded, watching as he go to his bike and go find better place to leave it for the night.

Soon he walked from around the corner and she opened the door to hallway. They took elevator to third floor where she lived and she opened the door.

"Put the chain on." She said when he followed her in and closed the door behind him.

He nodded and did as he was told, shrugging his jacket from his shoulders and kicked his boots off.

"You can- watch tv or something.. I just take quick shower."

He nodded again.

She wondered why he was so quiet but shook it off her mind for now, clicking television on as she passed by it.

She didn't have couch, but she had big bed. Now as she thought of it, they would not have any other choice but to sleep in same bed together.

The thought made her cheeks burn.

Jace looked around and sit down to edge of the bed, turning his golden gaze to television.

Clary handed him the remoter and went to get clean underwear and pajamas from her closet before locking herself into her bathroom. Part of her thought about leaving the door unlocked, secretly fantasicing of Jace coming in, pulling off his clothes and stepping into the shower with her. Looking down to her with those amazingly golden eyes of his before leaning to kiss her.

She blushed only of the thought, her heart beating fast. She had never had boyfriend, never even kissed anyone before Sebastian appeared. So her first kiss, and her first time, were potential nightmare material.

But Jace... He was just- so fascinating to her. She had never thought she would feel so attracted to someone after all what Sebastian put her through, but here she was, fantasicing about Jace.

She touched her lips trying to imagine what it would feel like to have his mouth on hers, and if she just closed her eyes, she could imagine him there with her.

A sigh escaped her lips and she covered her mouth, frozen in place.

Maybe- maybe the sounds of running water and sounds coming from television, had masked her voice... Well one could only hope. She finished her shower quickly, drying herself and got dressed into her pajamas, wrapping towel around her hair before coming out of bathroom.

Jace was leaning back to his elbows, watching some reality show. He sit up again when he saw her.

"Do you uhm- do you want to go to shower?" She asked, hoping her cheeks wouldn't be so red.

Jace shook his head, "I'm fine."

She just nodded, suddenly feeling very nervous. She didn't know what to say without making fool out of herself.

Jace stood up, frowning as he walked towards her, reaching for her arm and pushed the sleeve up.

Clary pulled her hand away, or tried to, but Jace held her wrist too tight, his golden gaze fixed on the scratch on her arm. It had opened again and stained her sleeve with little drops of blood. She must have rub it with the towel too harshly.

"What happened?" Jace asked.

"N-nothing.. It was an accident."

Jace turned her hand gently around, sadness washing over his features when he saw all the scars on her wrists.

"Don't lie to me Clary.. You wanted me to be honest, I want the same from you."

"Yeah, fine! I'm messed up freak and I do stupid things like this!.. Just go Jace.. You're better off without me."

Something flashed in Jaces eyes, then he pulled her towards him, sliding his arms around her waist, and he kissed her. It started out with careful, tender touch of lips on lips, her lips parting automatically under his, and it had quickly deepened into desperate, hungry act of affection and need to hold on to someone. Hold on to each other.

She slid her hands up his arms to his shoulders, wrapping her arms around his neck, but he broke away.

"What's wrong?" She asked, trying to process what just happened.

"I'm sorry.. I shouldn't have.."

"Don't.. Jace."

"I promised to be your friend."

She touched his cheek, then his lips, and leaned to press kiss on his lips. "I never got to answer that would I go out with you on a date or as a friend... Jace I trust you. Just- just take it slow with me.. Okay?"

Jace pulled her into tight hug, kissing her forehead before resting his chin top of her head while she pressed her ear against his chest, listening his heart beats.


	7. Spark of His Past

Clary was amazed of how easy -and surprisingly not awkward at all- it was to lay down with Jace, cuddling to his chest while he held her. They fit together perfectly.

She had fallen into peaceful sleep, feeling so secure and safe it was almost unreal.

Yes, Jace's eyes had reflected some desire when she kissed him, but that was for some reason, kind of flattering for her. To know he felt the same way about her as she felt about him.

But most of all, he seemed to have overpowering need to keep her close, just to keep her safe and be sure nothing would happen to her.

He was her own Guardian Angel. Or that's the way she refered thinking him.

Now she woke up on sudden movements on her side. She opened her sleepy eyes, muttering: "Jace? What time is it?"

There was no answer, but she heard him suck in ragged breath.

She sit up, rubbing sleep from her eyes, "Jace?"

He was laying on his back, breathing heavily, his eyes squeezed shut. Sweat had stained the neckline of his shirt and plastered his fair hair to his temples. His whole body was shaking, muscles of his arms flexing.

A nightmare. He must be having a nightmare.

He let out faint cry, moving his hand by reflex like trying to pull himself free.

Clary's heart ached to see him like this.

"Jace.. Jace please wake up.. Jace." She touched his shoulder to shake him lightly, but he winced, moving so fast Clary couldn't even react before he had slapped her hand away.

Tears were filling her eyes. "Jace... Please. Jace please wake up! It's just a dream. Just open your eyes and it's gone. Jace please."

She felt so helpless and small. She was the coward if she couldn't even help Jace out of his nightmares.

She took deep breath, taking her chances even if Jaces reflexes would kick in and try to get her away. She leaned carefully over him, pressing her lips against his. "Wake up Jace.. Just open your eyes and come back to me."

Suddenly he tensed, then he sit up, his eyes wide. Clary was nearly knocked off the bed, purely by surprise how fast he moved.

"Jace?"

He looked at her. His eyes wide and searching, his breathing fast. She could see his shirt was plastered to his back and little drop of sweat was running down his neck, making the hair on his neck curl.

She reached to take his hand on hers, but he pulled away.

"Jace?"

"I'm fine... I need some air. Can I- can I open the window for a second?"

"Sure.. Do you want some water?"

He just nodded, getting up and went to open nearest window, letting cool night air blow to his face.

Clary go to kitchen and poured him glass of cold water.

"Here."

He had his eyes closed, as if enjoying the wind on his face. He opened his eyes when she came, taking the glass from her with thankful nod.

Clary waited that he had drink his glass empty and took the glass from his hand, setting it down to her bedside table, carefully reaching out to touch his shoulder.

"Jace.. What did you dreamed about?"

He shook his head, his breathing had gone back to normal but she could tell his heart was still pounding.

"It wasn't a dream... It was a memory."

"Of- of your parents?"

"Yeah..."

Despite that he was sweaty, she wrapped her arms tightly around him, nuzzling her face to his neck.

He hesitated, but then his arms came around her, strong and protective.

"Tell me about it." She said softly.

"No."

"Jace please."

"Clary I can't.. I just can't. Even if I wanted to... I can't."

Clary looked up into his eyes. "Make it a story. Change the names of your parents if you need to, and tell it as a story, not as your own experience. Just a story of what happened."

Jace froned. "I don't know..."

Clary reached to put her hand against his cheek, "It'll keep haunting you if you never let it out... You promised to be here for me. Now I promise to be here for you. Let me help you too."

"You've got enough to handle on your own.. I don't want to bother you wi-"

Clary placed her finger to his lips, "Nonsense. I want to be here for you. I want to help you, I want to get to know you.. All about you.. No judging. I'm not in place to judge anyone.. Jace please."

He took deep breath, turning to look out of window and breathed the fresh air from while.

"Alright."

Clary rested her head against his chest, wrapping her arms around his waist, rubbing her hand in soothing circles against his back. "Take your time.. We don't have to hurry."

He swallowed, running his fingers through her hair repeatedly, like petting some pet.

"It.. It happened late one night. They were watching television while the kid already sleeping. Or supposed to be."

"Mr. and ."

"What?"

"Lets call them Mr. and Mrs. Brown. Makes it less personal and make it easier to tell it as just a story."

She could sense him smiling at that, only a little, but smile still, then he took deep breath and continued:

"So uhm- So Mrs. Brown was going to sleep too after some movie they were watching, had ended and her husband was supposed to follow after watching late night news and weather report for tomorrow. She was already in bedroom upstairs, and there was just this loud banging noise. yelled upstairs to his wife to take the kid and run, and she came to get the kid but they heard her husband scream of pain and-"

His voice trailed off. He was shaking again.

"Shh... Take a break.. It's okay." Clary whispered, hugging him tighter even her own eyes were filling with tears and her heart ached.

He swallowed and tried to speak, getting out just chocked sound.

Clary looked up. He was staring somewhere in distance through the window, his eyes were wide and the pulse on his throat was racing.

"Jace.. Jace, look at me."

She placed her hand to his cheek, turning her to look at her.

He looked so helpless against his own torment. The nightmare he had to live over and over again.

"Jace, remember- just a story.. We're here, in my place. Just you and me.. You're telling me a story."

He swallowed again, nodding weakly.

"So.. " He cleared his throat, "So told the kid to go to the balcony which had stairs down, and she went back to help her husband. For long time it was quiet, the kid went out to the balcony and climbed down to the ground but instead of running, he climbed to a tree and watched through window what happed inside the house.

There were strange men. They were holding his parents with their arms forced behind their backs.. And then.. Th.."

"Jace, breathe.. breath in, and out.. "

He couldn't. He was shaking and it seemed like he couldn't breathe at all.

Clary's eyes widen. She didn't know what to do. She told him to tell her what had happened and he wasn't ready for it.

Instead of helping, she had made it even worse for him.

"Jace! Jace, breathe!"

He gasped, turning to look at her. "They sliced his parents with knifes, all their organs pouring out of them as a bloody mess with screams of pain."

Clary's eye's filled with tears and they poured down her cheeks.

"Oh Jace..."

She hugged him so tight she feared she squeezed the life out of him, crying to his already wet shirt.

He held on to her tightly, burying his face to her neck.

He was shaking, but he didn't cry. He hadn't cried at all. Maybe he had cried for it so much when he was young that he wasn't really capable of crying to it anymore. Like Clary had cried after her mother when she was little, now the missing of her mother only made her feel bad.

There they were, holding each other like their life was up to one another, Clary sobbing and crying, Jace shaking.

When she finally pulled back, only to look into his eyes, his arms tightened around her anyway- refusing to let go.

"Jace.. I'm so sorry."

He blinked, "Why are you crying?"

She sobbed, running her hand to his chest, above his heart. "Because you're so hurt."

He eyes widen, nobody has cried for him. Not because of that how hurt he was.

He kept staring at her for long time, then he crashed his lips against hers, kissing her with such desperation and need that it almost made Clary cry again. But she didn't cry. She leaning into him and kissed him back with all her heart.

She would not be able to take his pain away, but she could help to ease it.

With sunshine peeking through the window, Jace and Clary had finally got out of bed.

They had laid down to hold each other, whispering soothing lines to each other and kissing.

"I- guess I would use a shower now." Jace said while Clary was making coffee.

She nodded and went to get clean towel from closet and handed it to him.

He took the towel and then took hold of hand before she could pull it away.

"Clary."

"Yeah?"

He leaned in, kissing her lips lightly before leaving to bathroom.

She shook her head and smiled, he was adorable then he acted like this. He made her feel so special.

But she couldn't get his expression out of her mind when he was struggling through his childhood horrors.

Without even thinking it, her hands seeked knife from the kitchen counter and she brought it to her wrist. She had forced him to tell it all to her. She had put him through it again.

She rolled up her sleeve and took deep breath, pressing cold blade against her arm.

"Clary!"

She dropped the knife and turned around, quickly pulling her sleeve down. She didn't know had it already cut through the skin or not, but it made no difference right now seeing the shocked expression on Jaces face.

He had his jeans on, and towel hanging around his neck. He had no shirt on though.

But she didn't have time to swoon over his gorgeous physicality now.

"Jace I-"

"What the hell were you thinking?" He took the knife from floor, his sharp gaze catching blood stein on the blade and he put it down, forcing her sleeve up.

It was barely a thin little line. She hadn't have time to press it deeper.

He seemed visibly releaved that it wasn't bad, but when he looked up into her eyes, he was pissed. She could tell, he was so angry she couldn't bear it.

"Jace I'm sorry.."

"For what?! Trying to kill yourself?!"

"Wha- No!"

He closed his eyes, taking deep breath to calm down.

"Clary give me one good reason why you trying to hurt yourself like that?"

She looked down, "Jace I just... I had to."

"why?"

"I.. I felt so bad to make you tell me that all.. I forced you to go through it all over again and I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry Jace.. I thought I could help you if I knew what happened but I just made it worse for you."

Jace sighed and pulled her into his arms.

"You're such an idiot Clary... You didn't make it worse.. You released me from it. I never talked about it, not with anyone.. I thought I couldn't.. But you found a way to get it out of me. And cried for me.. I can't do that either. You didn't help me Clary. You saved me. All that was eating me inside, and I couldn't stop it. You did.."

She looked up into his eyes, "C-can you forgive me?"

"Forgive you what?"

She looked at the knife on table, "That.."

Jace followed her gaze, looking at the knife for long time.

"Jace please... I-"

"I know what's it like." He said. He let go of her and showed his arms. He wasn't covered with scars like Clary's arms were, there was only few thick scars over his wrists. But those were much bigger than any of Clary's was.

She run her finger over his scars gently, then he pulld his hands away.

"I know what's it like.. And I know that it makes you feel like you can actually feel something. I'm not judging you Clary. I'm freaked out, because that thing- you hold against delicate veins under very thin skin, can kill you. And I can't take that. I.. I can't lose you Clary.. I'm not angry for you. I'm angry for myself. If I had come in any moment later, you might have already be laying on floor in pool of blood. And to be honest- I would have just follow you."

Clary looked shocked, then she felt so shamed of herself she could hardly bear it.

She looking down, "I'm sorry Jace.. I didn't think.."

He placed his finder under her chin, "Hey.. I know I can't do miracles. And if you feel like you need to do this.. Just, please, promise me you won't cut your wrists.. Okay? And don't try to hide it from me. Yeah, I'll be worried, I'll be scared, and it hurts me to see you hurt so much, but I want us to be able to be ourselves for each other."

One tear run down her cheek and she managed to offer faint smile, "Okay.. I promise."

He kissed her lips lightly and pulled her against him, his arms tightly around her.

"I can't lose you Clary.. I just can't. I l- I need you.."

Clary smiled, nuzzling her face to his neck, her hands shyly exploring his hard abs and sliding across his sides to his back as she hugged him. She blushed of the feel of his smooth bare skin. Oh shit, why he had to be so perfect?

_I need you too... And as scary as it is, I'm on highway to down below falling in love with you. _


	8. Spark of Connection

Clary just stared as Jace left the towel hanging over the door and left to get his jacket.

It took for while from her to realize that he was talking again. She was so perfectly distracted of his physicality, that she hadn't paid attention to anything else.

Oh no, and it didn't help her focus any better when Jace pulled his leather jacket on and left it hang open.

"Clary? Did you hear anything I just said?"

She blinked, "What?"

"I asked if you want to come with me now or do I come pick you up later?"

"I- I will just brush my hair and put some make up on.. I'll come with you now."

Jace nodded, "Are you alright?"

"Yeah.. Why?"

Jace shrugged, "you seem absent minded."

Clary bit her lip, silently cursing herself for blushing so easily.. Or no, cursing Jace to make her blush so easily. She didn't usually blush so easily, maybe occasionally if she got unexpected compliments or something- she might get little pinkish shade to her cheeks, but nope- she usually didn't blush so dark red as Jace got her to blush.

"Are you- uhm.. Where you left your- shirt?"

Jace raised eyebrow, he seemed amused now. "I washed it and left it to dry. I doubt it is yet." His lips curved into slightly teasing smile, "Why? Do I look so bad?"

Clary tried to hide her face behind her hair. "N-no.. Just asked.."

Jace chuckled, "Cute."

Clary covered her face with her hands, "I just go now." She said and hurry into bathroom, locking the door.

She looked at herself from mirror and sighed, her cheeks were happy glowing red. "Damn it."

She brushed her hair and pulled it in high ponytail, leaving couple curls hang loos around her face. Then she patted some make up powder to her face, added some mascara and lip gloss. Well, she liked to keep it simple.

Taking deep breath she stepped out of bathroom. "I'm ready to go." She said.

Jace was leaning against the wall, he came closer to her now and the look in his eyes threated to make her blush yet again.

"W-why are you looking at me like that?" She asked in small voice.

He didn't answer, but he leaned in to kiss her cheeks, and then her mouth. "You're beautiful."

There, now she did blush for sure.

"W-wouldn't you please not say things like that while we're at your parents house?" Clary asked.

Jace laughed. It was sweet sound that Clary loved, and made her smile as well.

Then he touched her cheek gently, "Why not? You're unbelievably adorable when you blush."

"I- I would like to keep the little that's left of my self confidence, thank you very much... Embarrasing me in front of your family w-won't help it much."

Jace frowned. "Clary, do you trust me?"

"I do."

"Then believe me when I tell you that you are beautiful, and if you worry about being embarrassed in front of Lightwoods, it's not gonna happen. They like you. It makes them practically blind of anything that might embarrass you."

Clary swallowed, "O-okay.."

Jace zipped his jacket closed and Clary secretly thanked her luck that he did. He was horribly distracting when nothing covered his smooth skin.

"Lets go then."

Clary nodded, got her shoes and jacket on and followed Jace out, locking the door behind them.

Jace had stopped by in front of some very new and fancy looking building- and Clary just guessed that rent of his apartment was at least twice as big as hers. He had asked her to wait outside, and he had come back zipping his jacket back up, gray t-shirt under it. Then they had go pick up a present for Max, and went into Lightwood's house.

Clary had stayed close to Jace, and he occasionally pushed her to go spent time with Maryse, but he stayed near by.

Kids didn't scare Clary. She actually liked kids. They were all so cute, so innocent and so full of dreams and ideas. She had to admit she was little excited about going to babysit Max when summer holidays in his usual day-care started.

Maryse worked part time, spending a lot of time with her family. So they had discussed of Clary being there from Monday to Thrusday, from 8.00 Am to 3.00 Pm. Maryse and Robert would leave her everything ready, so she didn't need to do anything but look after Max. And of course- as Maryse insisted, Clary would eat with them. It was her "bonus" Free meals.

When most children had left the party already with their parents, Jace decided to take Clary home.

"You're good with them." He had said when he handed her the helmet.

She shrugged, "I like children."

Jace got on his bike and waited for her to settle down behind him, "Lets hope you say the same when summer's over."

Clary slapped his back lightly, "Oh shush.. Just drive."

He laughed and drive towards Clary's apartment.

She wondered why he stopped, little too soon and tried to see over his shoulder.

"Jace? What is it?"

His muscles tensed and fear was creeping into Clary. "J-jace.."

She leaned to the side, seeing black sportcar parked in front her home building. Her heart stopped.

She knew that car.

_Sebastian_

She shivered, her arms tightening around Jace, shaking with fear. "Jace.. Lets go.. Take me away. Now."

But when car-door opened and the person spoke, it was not Sebastians voice. It was even deeper voice. Faintly similar to Sebastian's though.

Clary felt Jace shiver. He was afraid, but he didn't show it.

"Well, well, young Wayland."

"Valentine Morgenstern." Jace said, his voice dripping of hatred.

"I'm afraid we have some unfinished business, Jonathan."

"No. I owe you nothing. Our deal is way far behind already."

"Is it?" Valentine sounded amused, and Jace tensed.

Clary heard footsteps coming closer and she buried her face to back of Jace's jacket, trembling with fear.

"What do we have here?"

"Leave her alone Morgenstern, she has nothing to do with you." Jace growled.

Clary felt a touch on her back, she hang on to Jace tighter- afraid she was making it hard for him to breathe but she couldn't help it. She was so afraid.

Footsteps got distant and Clary loosened her hold of Jace just a little.

"I'm afraid you're wrong. She seems in fact, very familiar to me." Valentine spoke.

Jace laughed. It was forced, sarcastic sound, "Oh yeah, I'm sure she's very fond of you, just like everyone who's life you decide to smash into pieces."

Another- identically black sportcar stopped next to Valentine's and there he was- Sebastian.

"Father, why are we wasting time here, you are expected in our meeting in ten minutes, we have hurry."

Jace must have felt Clary's reaction to Sebastian's arrival, and his muscles tensed.

Clary didn't know did Jace know Sebastian as well, or what on earth Jace had to do with Valentine, but Jace was all she had to keep herself together right now. She was too afraid to move, to breathe, to do anything but hold on to Jace as tight as she could.

"No patience... That has always been your weakness." Valentine sighed.

"Well at least I get things done fast." Sebastian said.

And with that- they left.

Jace didn't move for while, then he looked over his shoulder to Clary. "Are you alright?"

Clary raised her gaze to his eyes. "H-how you knew him?"

Jace siged, "I... I was in fight and- the guy I almost killed was his son. Well apparently his son recovered damn well, we just saw him. It was that guy who came to get him."

Clary swallowed. "I- I've seen him b-be-fore." Tears run down her cheeks now.

Jace frowned, "What happened?"

"H-he... H-.." She couldn't say it. He raped her.

Jace swallowed, then he drive the bike to same place it was last night and he pulled Clary into his arms, lifting her up to carry her to her apartment while she cried helplessly to his shoulder.

"Clary.. Clary I need your key to open the door." He whispered softly.

She pulled her keys from her pocket and tried to get the key to the lock but her hands shake too much.

"Let me." Jace said, reaching his hand and opened the door, putting the chain to the door once they were inside.

He settled Clary to her feet but didn't let go of her, and she had to lean to him to stay on her feet.

He opened her jacket and tried to push it from her shoulders but she winced, trembling with fear.

"Okay.. Okay, lets just leave it." Jace said, picking her up again and carrying her over to the bed. He pulled a blanket around her before laying down next to her, holding her as she kept sobbing to his chest.

He had pretty good idea already what she had meant with that she had met Sebastian before, but as Clary had known his parents deaths would haunt him if he didn't get it out- he knew this would haunt her if she didn't let it out.

He kissed her forehead with feather light touch, stroking her hair tenderly.

"Tell me Clary... Tell me a story. Just a story- not your experience... Just a story what happened."

"N-no... You'd hate m-me.."

Jace closed his eyes, as if her words hurt. "I can't hate you Clary... I care too much. Just tell me.. Let it go."

Clary rested her head to his chest, listening his heart beats. "J-just p-promise me you w-won't let me go.."

Jace kissed top of her head, holding her tighter, "Never.. I'll never let you go."

She took shaky breath, tears streaming down her cheeks as she told him about the night she had met Sebastian. Her whole body was trembling, but Jace never let go of her. At the time when she got into actual raping part, he loosened his hold just a little, allowing her the chance to push him away if she felt uncomfortable to be so close to him, but she had nuzzled her face to his shirt, waiting for him to hold her tighter. She was safe here. She was safe with him.

"D-do you think I-I-m disgusting?" She sobbed, searching his golden eyes with hers.

Jace's eyes were mix of anger, hatred, worry, sadness... He haven't said anything except soothing words to calm her down when she had broke into hysterical cry.

He shook his head, still quiet.

"J-jace please.. Say something."

He took deep breath and sit up.

Panic hit Clary like bullet right into her heart. She reached for his hand. "Jace please! D-don't leave me.."

He looked at her. "I won't ever leave you Clary. I can't- leave you. I just... Give me a moment.. I'll be right back." He pulled his hand free from her grip and left.

Clary run to the window, trying to see if he was going to his bike, but she couldn't see him.

She went back to her bed, curling up in tight ball and cried to her pillow that still had faint scent of him.

"Clary.. Clary, look at me. I'm here."

She gasped and opened her eyes, seeing Jace sitting next to her, his hair windblown mess and his skin was cold.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, burying her face to his shoulder, and his arms came around her, strong and protective, as always.

"I- I t-thought you l-left me.."

"Shh, I promised you, remember.. I won't leave you. I just needed some fresh air to clear my mind... I hate him Clary. I hate him so much if I'd now see him, I might just kill him. I didn't want to scare you with my own hatred for him, so I went out to clear my head."

She held him tighter. "I'm not scared of you."

He kissed her lips. Lightly, gently.

"And- as for your question do I think you disgusting... No. You're amazing Clary. You're so much stronger than I could ever be. You're beautiful, not just by your looks- which is obvious, but I find your heart most beautiful thing I've ever seen. You gave me a chance no one else did. You cared- the way no one ever could... I- I think I'm in love with you."


	9. Spark of Horror

Clary blinked, "W-what?"

Jace frowned, he seemed to realize just now what he had just said.

"I.."

"It's okay.. You don't have to say anything. I- I get it."

"You do?"

"Yeah.. "Clary nodded and smiled little too cheerfully to be believable. "You tried to make me feel better."

Jace blinked few times, "No, Clary, it's not just that...I- " He sighed, "Never mind."

There was long awkward silence. Clary kept repeating in her mind: _He's just trying to be nice, and trying to make me feel better. It's okay.. He doesn't know I love him.. Wait- what?! Do I?_

Silence was broken by the sound of Jace's motorcycle's alarm, and they both went to window to see what was going on.

Clary froze.

Down there at the parking lot, was black sportcar, and beside it, was standing Sebastian. He had knocked Jace's bike over with his car and was now searching the windows with his shimmering black eyes.

Jace pushed Clary away from the window. "Don't- let him see you. Don't get any more lights on, be as if you were sleeping. He can't find out which apartment is yours."

"Jace.. What do we do now?"

"You stay here. Stay away from the windows, secure your door and don't let anyone in even if I come behind your door before I have called you. I call you when things are clear. Then I come back."

Clary got terrible feeling this would be last time she'd see him.  
Sebastian had already proved her that he was merciless and cruel. Jace was strong, she knew it. But Sebastian was bigger than him. Probably even few inches taller than him. In fair fight- would Jace's lifetime training and strength be enough to beat Sebastian? And Sebastian wouldn't probably even fight fairly.

She gripped of Jaces arm, "Don't go.. Jace, don't go there.."

He pulled her against him, kissing her forehead tenderly. She could tell that he was afraid as well. His pulse was racing and his muscles tensed.

"I'll come back to you." He whispered. Then he pulled himself free, got his boots and jacket on, and then he was gone.

Clary run to put the chain on the door again, searching for her phone to have it near her when Jace called.

When she heard that Jace's bike no longer alarmed, she knew he was out, and dispite his orders, she went to peek from the window and opened it carefully just a crack- to hear what happened down there.

"Wayland, long time no see." Sebastian's smooth voice chuckled.

"What you want Morgenstern, you really ruined my beauty sleep and now I'm pissed." Jace answered sarcastically.

"Beauty sleep?" Sebastian sounded amused, "With a pretty redhead? I'm sure she makes you feel very pretty."

"I asked you what you want. Answer me or just leave. I'm fine with both options." Jace said, but Clary could hear tension in his voice.

"Did I hit your nerve, Wayland? Is that redhead something special to you?"

"Answer the question- or leave."

"Or what? You try to kill me?" Sebastian sounded, by all means, amused. As he was enjoying himself.

There was long silence and Clary dared to peek through the window again to see what was going on.

Jace had closed the distance between himself and Sebastian, and was speaking with low voice, so she couldn't hear him, but by Sebastian's expression, she could guess Sebastian didn't like what he was hearing.

Finally Jace took a step back and Sebastian was glaring at him with murderous look in his black eyes.

"Your choice Morgenstern, I have nothing lose." Jace shrugged.

Sebastian growled. Actually growled- like an animal, and he pounced on Jace, trying to hit him.

Jace's reflexes were faster though. He moved out of the way and hit his elbow on Sebastians back when he passed him, causing Sebastian almost fall to the ground.

"You'll wish you didn't do that Wayland. I get rid of you, I will find that redhead of yours and make sure she screams until she has no sound in her worthless little body left to let out. Then she can follow you to hell."

Jace seemed uneffected by this threat, but Clary knew he was scared. Or maybe he wasn't. Maybe his defending reflexes snapped something in his brain that he wasn't so scared, that he didn't care, he just fight his way through to survive.

Then her eyes widen with shock. Sebastian had pulled out a knife.

Fear flashed in Jaces golden eyes and Clary couldn't just stand there and do nothing. She run to her small kitchen and took the knife from kitchen counter, slipping her shoes on and run out.

Jace was trying to avoid Sebastian's knife and get it away from his hand, but so far no luck. His eyes widen and he shook his head when he was Clary coming out, but it was too late.

Sebastian turned to look over his shoulder and smirked, "Ah, redhead."

"L-leave Jace alone or I'll stab you.. I swear I will." She said, hoping she would have sound braver.

Sebastian laughed and looked at Jace, pointing his knife lazily towards Clary. "Really? You fall for this? Trembling and whining little doll." He whistled, "You have shitty taste of women Wayland. I can tell you already she's not very good in bed, but she screams nicely."

Something flashed in Jaces eyes, and before Clary could even react, he had already kicked the knife out of Sebastian's hand, pushed Sebastian to the ground and held the knife on his throat.

But Sebastian was laughing; "Go ahead Wayland. You're not a murderer. You're too pathetic and too damn scared to live with yourself if you killed me."

Jace's hand was steady, holding the knife on Sebastian's throat. "I'm not scared of killing you Morgenstern. Not when you crossed my tolerance line of your bullshit."

"What? That chick?" Sebastian laughed, "She's not worth it. Believe me."

"No, you're not worth of believing. You're not strong, you're hypocrite. You destroy others lives because you have no damn idea how to live your own, and you have got everyone hate you- so you have no one. You have nothing to live for, so you try our reasons to live as well." Jace said calmly.

Hate shimmered in Sebastian's eyes, he was growling, and before Clary could scream to Jace to watch out- Sebastian had pulled out another knife and hit Jace on the shoulder with it.

Clary screamed so loud that she didn't hear it if Jace cried out, but he had dropped the knife and Sebastian was now raising to his feet.

"Shut up bitch." He hissed for Clary and kicked Jace in the stomach, making Jace cough and gasp for air.

"Stop it! Please, stop it!" Clary cried.

Sebastian looked from Clary to Jace, his black eyes glowing with excitement. "Well, well... We're in luck, aren't we? You two fools are in love."

Jace got onto his knees and pushed himself to stand up, holding his bleeding shoulder. "Sorry to disappoint you jackass, but I'm not a boyfriend type and we both know it. I'm practically a man whore, and she'd never be so stupid to fall for me."

Clary blinked her teary eyes. He had not just said that. He had not...

"Really?" Sebastian laughed and went behind Jace, holding the knife to his throat and Clary froze, whining and pleading Sebastian to let him go.

"Look at her Jace. She's pleading. For you." Sebastian hissed to Jace's ear.

"If you're going to kill me, get it over with already. I'd hate to die for boredom to listen your worthless lies." Jace said.

Sebastian pressed the knife deeper, and Clary saw few thin lines of blood run down Jace's throat.

She creamed and run closer, trying with all her strenght to pull Sebastian's arm that was holding the knife- away from Jace.

"Stop! Please.. Please, leave him alone!"

Then, finally, she heard sound of police car coming.

Sebastian cursed and let go of Jace, hopping into his car and turned it around to drive away, but his way was blocked by police car.

Jace fell to his knees, gasping for breath, and Clary kneel down next to him, reaching out for him.

"Jace.. Jace, look at me. Please.. Jace.. You'll be alright, okay? I- I'll call help, just stay with me Jace."

"No need. I already called ambulance." Kind female voice said behind them and Clary turned to look at older lady who she had seen in hallway couple times.

There were faces on every window of her neighbors apartments.

"Th-thank you.." Clary sobbed.

Jace breathed hard, it seemed that each breath was hard work for him.

Then he fell unconscious and Clary catch him, pulling him rest his head on her lap. Tears run down her cheeks and she kept stroking Jaces hair tenderly. "Wake up.. Wake up.. Wake up.. " She kept praying.

When ambulance came, the older lady put her hands on Clary's shoulders and kept her still when nurses came to get Jace. Clary wanted to go with him, but they wouldn't let her.

"Take the girl's number. I think it's only fair that you let her know as soon as there's any news of the boy's state. This has been shocking for her already." Older lady said to nurses, and they asked Clary's number, promising to call her as soon as there was anything to tell about his state.

When ambulance left, Clary noticed that Sebastian's car was left behind, but he was nowhere to be seen- and neither were police cars.

"They took him. That monster will have few years in jail with bit of luck. The police officers will be back though. They has a lot of questions for you young lady." Her neigbor said.

Clary didn't care. She felt numb. She had lost Jace and she couldn't do anything about it. She haven't even told him that she did love him. He had said he was in love with her, and she had pushed it aside... She was such a fool!

"I.. I need to be alone now." She said to neighboring lady.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes... I want to get out of these blood stained clothes and get shower and just- rest. Lay down and watch tv or something to just.. Calm down."

"Alright. But if you need anything, don't hesitate to come to me. You can come to ring my doorbell anytime. Dorothea, is written in my door."

Clary just nodded, and made her way back upstairs to her apartment.

She went to take a shower, finding Jace's black t-shirt hanging there as he had left it there in morning.

It was dry now. Clary took it and sniffed at it. It smelled her washing powder but it had still faint scent of him.

She put it aside, stripping out of her clothes and went to shower. She took a small blade and swallowed. She had promised to Jace that she won't cut her wrists... But Jace was gone...

She sobbed, tears mixing with shower water as she run the blade across her wrist, blood dripping down in thick drops.

She hardly even felt the pain. She missed Jace so much she couldn't feel anything else.

Turning the shower off, she went to get clean underwear and pulled Jace's shirt on. Her blood was dripping to the floor where ever she went, and when she was begining to feel dizzy, just then she wrapped a bandaid around her wrist and went to bed, hugging the pillow that had Jace's scent, she laid there crying until there was no more tears left to cry. She just wished she would die, to find Jace again from somewhere- where ever they ended up after death. And with that thought- she ripped off the bandaid and closed her eyes.

"I did love you Jace.. And still do.. I love you."


	10. Spark of Death

There was loud banging sound.. Chain clingling..

"Clary! Clary!"

Luke? That was Luke's voice. Clary could recognize it anywhere.

Luke, her godfather- her only family..

She opened her eyes and tried to call for Luke. She felt weak, tired. She wanted to just sleep.

There was silence, then Luke's voice again, shushing for someone and then calling: "Clary? Did you say something?"

"Lu-ke.." She called him.

She could hear Luke sigh. It was releaved sigh.

"Clary, come take the chain off. We need to talk to you."

"We?"

Luke chuckled, "There is a police officer with me."

Police officer? Then it hit her- Jace! Sebastian had murdered Jace. She sobbed helplessly, "Make it go away!"

She heard low whispers in hallway, then Luke said: "Would you let me in alone? I just really want to make sure you're alright. I was so worried when I got a call from police what had happened. Are you alright Clary? Would you come let me in?"

Then there was kind sounding female voice: "If you feel uncomfortable talking with me now Clarissa, I will gladly come back to see you later after you have had some time with your father. Would that be better?"

"Jace is dead!" Clary cried.

"Who is Jace?" Luke asked, puzzled. But the female voice said: "Jonathan Wayland. He's not dead Clarissa, he is in hospital and he was in critical state last time I heard anything but he was physically in excellent shape and he was healthy, so they have their hopes up he will survive just fine."

Critical state? Jace was still alive?

Clary sit up, feeling light headed. "Luke.."

"Yes?"

"I- I did something stupid.. I don't feel well."

She heard Luke take deep breath, "Do you need to see doctor? I can take you to hospital if you come open the door."

"Don't be angry for me.." She said standing up, she leaned against the wall to stay on her feet.

Her arm and hand was covered with dry blood and even the wound has stopped bleeding now, it ached, it pulsed painfully along with her heartbeats.

"Make her go away.." She said. She didn't want anyone else see her like this.

"I will go. I will come back to see you later." Female voice said and she could imagine Luke nodding to her with gratitude.

When she turned from the corner and made her way towards the door, she could see Luke from doorway. Chain was holding the door closed, making it impossible for him to get in. He got pale, his eyes were wide with shock and he reached his hand from small crack to reach for her.

"Clary!" His voice was thick with fear. It probably alarmed the officer who was going down the stairs, because she heard running foot steps and then there was blonde woman behind him in blue uniform.

"I'll call 911 right away. She needs ambulance."

Clary touched Luke's out reached hand.

"Oh Clary.. What have you done.."

"Don't be angry.. Don't.."

Luke shook his head, his kind eyes were shimmering with tears, "I'm not angry.. I'm worried."

Clary nodded, and let go of Luke's hand.

He pulled his hand away so she could close the door and get chain off. Then she opened her door again.

Then Luke was there, holding her in his arms, stroking her hair like he had done countless times when she was little girl and was upset of something. She felt so safe when Luke pulled her into his arms, and calmed her down with brushing his fingers through her red curls.

"Ambulance is coming." Blonde woman said.

Luke just held his god-daughter in his arms, and despite her lack of clothing- considering she only had underwear and Jace's t-shirt on, he said nothing. He just stood there, holding her, patting her back lightly and stroking her hair.

He didn't care of the woman behind him, or anything else. Clary was his family. His little girl. He just wanted her to be alright.

Then everything went blurry for Clary. Everything happened so fast.

Ambulance came, and Luke insisted on going with Clary. She remembered being carried to the ambulance, and Luke sitting beside her, holding her hand that was not cut.

Her injured hand didn't feel anything, and she had been faintly aware of that it was because of needle the nurse had used on her.

She was drifting off to sleep again. She was tired.. So, so tired.

It was warm, but everywhere was dark. She was cold, but everywhere around her was warm. Like warm wind blowing around her. She looked around, but couldn't see anything. Just dark. Endless darkness...

No sounds. No sounds at all.. No sound of breathing- or heartbeat.

She was dead.

She tried to call out for Jace. Tried to scream his name, but there was no sound. Her lips moved with silent screams. No one would hear them. She wanted to cry, but she couldn't get tears into her eyes.

She was frozen in place, into silent darkness. Was this her price to pay for commiting suicide? Was her punishment that she won't ever see Jace again?

Jace... Her thoughts wrapped around his name, the memory of him. Warmth of his solic muscled body against hers when he held her. The safe feeling of his arms around her. The scent of him that was intoxicating for her. Addicting- somehow.

And those golden eyes. Seeing right through her into her soul, making butterflies fly crazily around her stomach. And that gorgeous smile that made her blush so red she could hardly tolerate the heat on her face.

She wanted to see him again, hold him again. She wanted to tell him she loved him. As crazy as it might be- she had fallen in love with him so fast- so hard, she couldn't deny it.

The darkness around her started to fade. It was getting lighter. Like sun rising, slowly lighting up the world.

Then there was painful pressure on her chest, and electric shock washed over her body. She wanted to gasp. Catch her breath. Anything to make the pain go away.

Then she heard breathing again, heart beat.. She opened her eyes.

"I found pulse. She's coming back." She heard unfamiliar female voice.

Her vision was blurry and she blinked few times to clear it.

"J-ja-ce.."

"She's awake. Doctor! She's awake and talking."

The sound of footsteps hurried closer, then she saw a blurry figure. Figure of older man in white coat.

"Good to see you awake Clarissa. You scared us quite badly." He said.

Clary blinked, "Jace.."

The man frowned. "Who is Jace?"

Before Clary could answer, she heard Luke's voice and then she felt warm grip on her hand. Luke was there beside her, leaning over to kiss her forehead.

"Clary.. Thank god you made it.. I was already fearing the worse. Don't ever scare me like that again."

Clary managed to smile faintly at him.

"Wh-where's Jace?"

Luke shook his head, "I don't know. I don't know your friend so I don't know who to look for you."

"He's not.. My friend." She swallowed, "I love him."

Luke blinked, "And you were going to introduce this guy to me- when?"

Clary couldn't help but smile on his puzzled expression. "I would have.. Soon."

Luke shook his head, obviously trying not to smile. "Well we talk about that later." Then he looked at the doctor, "What's the damage?"

Older man took deep breath, "She had lost a lot of blood. If you had found her any later, she might have been dead. You were extremely lucky to bring her here at last minute so we were able to get more blood in her body."

Luke looked pale, he just nodded to signal that he understood. It probably hit him even harder now that he was so close of losing his god-daughter.

"And, I would suggest you to see therapist Clarissa." The older man said directing his words to her.

"W-why?"

"You are so thin, your body is starving. Your organs has to work way too hard to keep your body going. That's why your heart stopped for a moment even we got more blood in you."

"I- I'm not starving myself o-on purpose... I.." She looked at Luke and then back to the doctor. "I just don't have enough money to get any food."

Luke sighed and buried his face to his hands.. "I should have known that. I could have help you, this wouldn't have happened."

Clary felt terrible, and she reached her hand to touch Luke's shoulder, "No.. No you did more than enough for me. It's not your fault. P-please don't think that way.. It's not your fault."

The doctor cleared his throat and Luke looked at him, "She's speaking truth doctor. She never starved herself when she lived with me, she ate very well and healthy. I don't believe she'd be starving herself."

"I believe that is true, but I still highly recommend that she would see therapist. She has many scars on her wrists and this was very clearly a suicide attempt."

Luke sighed heavily. "I should have done something..."

Clary sit up, feeling slightly dizzy as she did but she didn't care, "It's not his fault!"

The doctor looked at her, so did Luke. "Clary?"

Clary shook her head, "Luke did everything any daughter could ask for. He's always been taking so good care of me, always given me a chance to do things on my own but I knew he was there to look after me, it's not his fault!"

"I did not mean to sound accusing-"

"Yes you did!" Clary snapped. "I'm not seeing therapist, I'm not crazy, I'm just troubled, and my troubles has simple solution and it's not some damn pills or stranger asking me "How you feel today?" Because my only answer is: I feel like crap! And I want Jace, I want him back! He makes me happy and he makes me feel good and I feel alive when he's there. And I want Luke. I want my family! Not some strangers hanging around me and feeding me with medicines!"

She turned to look Luke and sniffed, "I'm moving back home. I don't want to be alone."

Luke just nodded and took hold of her hand, "Sure. You have always your room there to come back to, but try to take it easy now. You need rest. I try to find this Jace somewhere and find out is he alright, okay?"

Clary nodded, leaning back to her pillows, feeling suddenly very tired.

Luke squeezed her hand gently, and turned to leave then. The doctor following him, "A word with you Lucian, if you don't mind."

"Sure." She heard Luke reply, then everything went black as she fell asleep.


	11. Spark of Change

**Week later **

Clary had moved back to her old room in Luke's house, visiting hospital as often as she could to see Jace, even he was unconscious.

"He needs rest Clary, don't worry. He'll be fine." Luke had said probably million times.

Clary sighed and left her untouched dinner to table. "I'm not hungry." She muttered and went to her room, cuddling with Jace's shirt that she still had.

She heard Luke sigh, and she knew she was making him worried, but she couldn't help it. She wanted Jace.

Nothing really meant anything to her without him.

Luke had insisted that she would let him check her arms every now and then for new cuts. He said he didn't judge her, that he wasn't happy about what she had done to herself but he was not jugding her by any means, and even he wasn't saying it, she knew he was worried that she would try kill herself again. And she couldn't really blame him. She would probably feel the same if something had happened to Luke.

She had tried to tell him that she only did it because she thought Jace was dead, and she wanted to follow him, but Luke didn't seem too convinced.

Most likely just to ease Luke's conscious that she knew he was blaming himself, she had joined Luke more than one night when he was watching television late.

"Can't sleep?" He had asked when she crawled to the couch next to him.

She shook her head, "I'm worried Luke."

He gave her compassionate look and patted her shoulder, "You know what they say all the time. He's strong. He will recover. Just be patient."

She had given him a small smile, rested her head to his shoulder while they sat there watching some late night show.

"Luke"

"Hm?"

"I'm happy you're here for me."

She could tell he was smiling at that. "I'm happy to be here for you."

She assumed that had worked a little to make Luke blame himself less, and that on the other hand, helped her guilty conscious of making him blame himself when he was not the one to blame at all.

So now here she was, still trying to find her way back to life even it seemed impossible without Jace. She hardly remembered what she was living for before him.

Probably for Luke. She kept trying now for Luke's sake. And for the hope Jace would come back to her.

She nuzzled her face into his shirt, and eventually, she fell asleep, trying to reach Jace from her memories.

She woke up for sounds from kitchen. Blinking her eyes open- she realized it was morning already.

She had slept- over 12 hours?

Shaking her head, she got up, holding Jace's shirt in her hand and went to kitchen to see Luke there making coffee.

"Morning, did you sleep well?" Luke asked. He seemed to be in good mood.

"Okay." Clary nodded.

Luke smiled and handed her cup of coffee. "Here. You better get yourself ready."

"What for?" She frowned and sipped her coffee.

There was knock on the front door.

"That." Luke said and went to open the door.

Maryse Lightwood walked in. "Will you come with me please." She said to Clary.

Clary looked at Luke, then Maryse, and nodded. "I- i'll just go.. Change my clothes."

Maryse nodded.

Clary could hear Luke and Maryse chat while she was changing her clothes.

At the hospital, Luke had found Jace for her, and Maryse had been there to visit her adopted son, and Luke and Maryse had ended up becoming friends fast.

"I'm ready." Clary announced stepping out of her room in jeans and black tank top.

"Lets go then." Maryse said and lead Clary to her car.

"Where are we going?"

"I will need you to look after Max for couple of hours." Maryse said while driving towards Lightwood's house.

"oh.. Of course." Clary said, failing to hide her disappointment.

She had got her hopes up that she might see Jace. That Maryse would tell her that he was awake and fine now.

_Stupid.. I'm so stupid. _

"Here we are. Alec is there now- so sent him here when you get in." Maryse said stopping in front of her house.

Clary just nodded and got out of the car. Wind blod her hair all around her face and she had to hold it back to see where she was walking.

She knocked on the door and Alec came to open the door.

"Your mother said to-"

"I know, I'm going." Alec said, taking his jacket while passing Clary.

Clary shrugged and went inside, kicking her shoes off before going to find Max.

"Hello? Hello?... Max?" She called.

"Max, this is isn't funny. Where are you?"

Then she heard sounds from upstairs where all Lightwood kids had bedrooms.

She went up the stairs and realized that the sounds must be coming from television.

"Max?" She opened the little boy's room door, but the room was empty.

"Max?!"

No answer. Then she tried every door on the line. Izzy's, Alec's... She stopped. Last one had to be Jace's.

She took deep breath and opened the door.

Television was on, and there was playing some random family movie. She looked around. Max wasn't there.

Sound of running water coming from small mathroom at the corner of the room told her he must be there.

Well, there she won't go to find him, he'd come out when he was done.

Sitting down to bed to wait, she watched the movie that was playing.

Alice in Wonderland.. Of course, so classic.

She didn't realize that the door behind her opened, so she jumped as she felt touch on her shoulder.

Her eyes got wide, and she just stared at him.

"Jace?"

He smiled at her that gorgeous smile that made her cheeks glow red.

He was shirtless- again, making her blush, wearing comfortable black pants that might be from pajama.

His hair was wet, dripping few little drops to run down his perfect muscled body. There was fading bruise on his side, but only small stiched line on his shoulder, and around his throat was small bandaid.

But he seemed by any means recovering well.

She wanted to throw her arms around him and hold him tight, but she was afraid she'd hurt him.

Then he reached out his hand, touching her cheek lightly, "I've missed you." He whispered, leaning to kiss her lips.

"Oh Jace..." She gasped, gently placing her hands to his shoulders, trying not to hurt him, leaning closer while responding to his kiss eagerly.

Teards filled her eyes. They were happy tears.

She had thought she lost him for good, and here he was, recovering well and standing on his own two feet.

His arms slid around her, pulling her close to him as their kiss deepened into desperate- hungry mess, both of them trying to make up to time they had lost, trying to take the pain away, trying to say everything that was left unsaid.

Clary broke off to catch her breath, "I love you" She gasped.

Jace blinked, "Clary..."

She bit her lip. His expression was unreadable, and she soon started to feel like she had made huge mistake.

"Jace say something.. Anything."

He shook his head and her heart felt like it was freezing.

"I can't say anything to that Clary... Because I just don't have words to tell you how much you mean to me, no words to descripe how much I love you, and no idea how this all happened so fast."

Clary blinked her teary eyes, speechless.

Then he leaned to kiss her again, moving closer to her and backing her against the wall, his hands running down her sides.

Shivers run down Clary's spine when his fingers found the hem of her tank top and slipped under it, ever so lightly exploring the skin of her waist. But he didn't make a move to get it off of her.

"Jace.."

He pulled back to look into her eyes, blinking.

She touched his cheek, caressing his gorgeous features. "Are you alright?"

It wasn't best timing to ask, she knew, but she needed to know. He had sucked out every piece of her self control not to pull him into so tight hug he wouldn't be able to breathe. Well- she just wanted so badly to hold him tight.

He smiled a little, it was gentle smile, and he didn't seem bothered of being interrupted.

He kept his hand under her top, his fingers drawing random circles along her skin, making it horribly difficult to focus.

"I'm fine... They sent me home to rest. There's very little anyone can do right now to help me any better, I just have to take it easy- not lift anything heavy and so on... And I much rather be at home resting than there."

Clary smiled, kissing his lips lightly. "I missed you.. I missed you so much."

Jace's smile was got playful edge, "Well you're stuck with me for the day now. Lightwoods went to take Max to amusement park and Iz and Alec went with them, so you- are babysitting me."

Clary couldn't help but laugh, "I'm babysitting you?"

Jace shrugged lightly, and Clary noticed that he winced slightly. Apparently the side where his ribs were injured, was still quite sore. She took a note from that to be very careful with him. But even if she could just hold his hand, it was better than not being with him. Just by touching of him, even a little, made her feel like she could do anything. She could do anything for him. He was like golden sun in middle of her darkness.

"Maryse won't leave me alone for whole day. They might be back just really late, so when Iz and Alec said they want to go as well, she kept me about hour long speech to behave myself if she let you come look after me."

Clary raised eyebrow, "Behave yourself?"

Jace shook his head, "I don't know what she thinks I am, I can hardly get up from the bed on my own."

Clary frowned worriedly and watched him to gi sit down on his bed, slowly getting himself to lay down, wincing at the pain on his side. Then he took deep breath when he was laying there, apparently the pain eased away.

She could imagine his side was sore and aching anytime he had to actually use his side muschles, but otherwise, if he was standing or laying down straight, he seemed fine.

She went to sit down next to him and took hold of his hand, seeing his expression change to frown, she placed her hand to his cheek. But he pulled away. He didn't let her touch his face. Instead, he took hold of her arm, his golden gaze fixed on the small bandaid Luke made her keep over her sliced wrist until it would be perfectly healed.

"Oh.. Jace.. I can e-"

"Explain?" He asked, his tone was cold. He was angry with her. She could tell, he was angry.

He ripped the bandaid from her wrist and examined now almost healed wound. Then he let go of her, leaning his head back against the pillows and closed his eyes.

She could imagine he was trying to keep his anger in check.

"Jace.." She wanted so badly to find anything to say that would fix things. Make him forgive her. "I'm sorry."

"For what? That you lied to me? Or that you just made me wonder what the hell I would have to live for if you had successfully dried yourself to death?"

He sounded tired, hurt.

Clary looked down to her wrist. "Jace I'm sorry.. I didn't mean to worry you... It's just- I thought you were dead, and I wanted so badly to follow you, I just... " She sobbed, covering her face with her hands, "I'm sorry!"

She couldn't bear to see his betrayed expression. She knew he was angry and hurt. She knew it was all her fault. She digged her nails into her palms, sitting up straight and was about to get up when he gripped her arm, pulling her back down.

She dared herself to take a peek of his expression through her lashes. He didn't seem angry now. He looked sad. So, so utterly sad it ached her heart.

"Jace?"

He touched her lips as if to shush her, and run his fingers through her hair, gently playing with one red curl.

"I don't try to make you feel bad Clary... I'm sorry. But you have to understand that if I lose you- I have nothing left to live for. And just that I know, I might have lost you.. "He shook his head, "Clary it hurts.. It hurts me to know that you're hurt."

She sobbed, leaning to kiss his lips lightly, muttering between feather light kisses, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

He stroked her hair, her back, pulling her closer, deepening their kiss. It wasn't hot and hungry, but loving and gentle, and filled with all that need to just ease the pain they were going through.

Her phone ringing interrupted them.

"I should answer."

Jace shook his head, claiming her lips in another kiss, "Ignore it.."

She sighed, unable to resist him and she ignored her phone... Until it started ringing again.

"Jace, I have to."

He sighed in defeat and let her go.

"Hey Luke." She answered, but the voice that greeted her from other end of the line wasn't Luke's.

_"_Hey Clary.. It's me, mom."

Clary dropped her phone and it broke to the floor.

Jace frowned, reaching to touch her arm. "What's wrong?"

She looked at him with utterly lost look in her eyes, "My mother."

Jace blinked, "Isn't that- good thing?"

Clary swallowed, "She dumbed me when I was five Jace... She never called or contacted me before. It's been 15 years Jace! 15 years! What she wants from me now?!"

"Okay, okay.. Shh.. Calm down." He shushed and pulled her down to him, and she laid her head to his better shoulder while he held her tight. "We'll deal with it together, whatever it is."


	12. Sparks of New Begining

After spending her day watching movies and eating all kind of yummy meals and snacks with Jace, Clary knew what she had waiting for her at home.

Jocelyn Fray.

Her mother who had abandoned her without a word 15 years ago.

Jace had managed to get her thoughts away from her mother, but now as she was walking back home, her thoughts were getting clouded with doubts and suspicion. What her mother could possibly want from her now?

She stopped to the front door and took deep breath before unlocked the door and went in.

"Luke, I'm home!"

Luke came from kitchen to greet her with his usual pat on her shoulder and gentle smile, asking: "How was your day?"

She shrugged and managed to smile at him, "Jace is recovering well."

"That's good." Luke said, obviously delighted of that news since it meant that Clary didn't need to worry so much anymore.

Clary didn't know exactly how Luke felt about Jace. He hadn't said anything, and so far Luke and Jace had not met each other officially. Jace had been sleeping when they saw him at the hospital, and Luke hadn't visited hospital since Clary got home.

"Clary, there's someone you should-"

"I don't want to see her." She snapped before Luke could even finish.

Luke sighed, then behind him came thin, elegant looking redhead with identical red curls and sparkling green eyes as Clary had.

Jocelyn.

Clary backed had back against the door behind her, staring at her mother.

"Clary... Good god you have become such a lovely young woman." Her mother said.

"Oh yeah, did you expect me to still five years old kid waiting for you to come back? Well too bad, I'm not. I stopped waiting for you long time ago."

Jocelyn closed her eyes for a moment, "Clary, you don't understand-"

"No, I don't. And I don't care to understand anymore." Clary answered.

"Clary-" Luke started but Clary shook her head

"Stop it! Stop it, stop it! Get her out of here! Now!"

Jocelyn looked shocked, Luke frowned.

"Clary, just listen for while, there's something you need to know." He said.

"No! I don't want to hear anything from her! I don't trust her! I don't want to see her! She's not my mother!" And with that, Clary turned around and run out of the door.

She knew it was stupid to go out alone so late, but her blood was boiling. She couldn't take the sight of her mother without feeling like she was stabbed in chest. She had loved her mother so much, and Jocelyn let her down. Had betrayed her love so badly she couldn't just take it.

She run towards Lightwood house. They would let her in and Jace would be there for her. Maybe they would let her stay there for the night if she explained them what happened.

She was exhausted, but she was also too afraid to stop running.

Either she was afraid Luke and Jocelyn would be coming after her with a car and she would be forced to tolerate Jocelyn's company, or that someone stranger would find her as nice bullying target and catch her.

She already saw Lightwood's house when black sportcar was speeding down the street to catch up with her.

Her heart stopped and she tried to run faster, fiercly banging on the door when she got to Lightwood's house.

The car had slowed down, stopped, and she could feel eyes staring at her.

"Coming." She heard Robert's voice behind the door before it opened.

"Clary?" He looked utterly surprised. "What you're doing here so late?"

"Who is it dear?" Maryse's voice asked and soon she joined her husband to the doorway. "Clary?"

She catched her breath, "C-can I stay here tonight? Please?"

Maryse and Robert looked at each other, then Clary, and moved out of the way to let her in.

"Clary, dear, what happened? You look terrified." Maryse asked.

Clary looked out of the window, the car was still there. "He followed me..."

Robert followed her gaze. "That's that Morgenstern again." His voice was annoyed.

Clary couldn't help herself, she said: "Could I talk to Jace?"

"Jace is already asleep." Maryse sounded sorry.

Clary sighed, knowing she was being fool. "Can I see him? Just a moment?"

Maryse and Robert shared a look, then Maryse nodded. "Come along dear." She wrapped arm around Clary's shoulders and lead her upstairs to Jace's room.

Jace was laying on his back, his chest rising and falling calmly. One hand resting over his chest and other on his side. He looked so peaceful like this.

Despite having Maryse watching her like a hawk, Clary sat down carefully next to Jace, taking his hand into her own.

He stirred. Maryse made slight sound of clearing her throat, and Jace blinked his eyes open, smiling as he saw Clary.

"Hey.." Then he frowned, "What's wrong?"

Tear run down Clary's cheek, he was so caring.. He knew in an instant if anything bothered her.

He reached his hand to catch her tear, "Clary?"

She sobbed, "I can't be around her.. I just can't.."

Jace's expression softened and he pulled her down to him, kissing her forehead. "You don't have to."

Maryse cleared her throat and Jace turned to look at her, "We're adults mom, we don't need you babysitting us."

"I didn't mean it like that." She said, apparently little hurt of her son's words.

"Well don't act like there's something wrong in that I actually care about someone." Jace snapped.

Clary heard Maryse made slight gasping sound, "Jace.."

"Seriously mom. How many times have you actually seen me down after I met Clary? Really? Think about that. And just for the record, I'm not screwing her if that's what you're afraid. I'm not well enough, and I don't want her just for sex. I want her to share my life with her."

Clary pulled back to look at him, she was as speechless as Maryse was. Then she looked to the doorway to Maryse.

Maryse held her hand over her mouth, her eyes were shimmering like she was trying to hold back tears.

"I didn't mean that it's wrong for you to care about her."

Jace sighed, he seemed now slightly regretful. "I'm sorry.. I'm just sick of that you're all over me like I couldn't handle myself. I'm not a child anymore."

Maryse shook her head. "You were never ordinary child Jace. You were much stronger and braver than other children. But you will always be my child. Even you're grown up to be this tough young man you are- you're still my son."

Jace nodded, holding his hand out to Maryse and Clary moved a little out of the way to let Maryse come hug him.

"I'll bring Clary extra blanket." She said and left then.

Jace pulled Clary back to him, and she rested her head on his good shoulder, snuggling to him as he wrapped his arms around her.

"Jace?"

"Hm?"

"Did you mean that?"

He looked at her, "Mean what?"

"That... You want to share your life with me?"

He kissed her forehead, "Of course I want. I'm in love with you Clary. By all means as crazy as it is- considering we met so little time ago, but I'd be a liar if I said I didn't fall for you right away."

She smiled, leaning to kiss his lips. "That makes two of us.. I fell for you so fast, so hard, I can't live without you.. I want to share my life with you too."

He smiled his gorgeous smile, "Consider yourself stuck with me for rest of our lives Redhead."

She giggled. "I'll be happy to."

Maryse brought a blanket and smiled for them slightly. "Good night then."

"Night mom." Jace said while Clary muttered "thanks"

Then they were alone again.

"Jace... I think that Morgenstern guy was following me."

She felt Jace tense, "Sebastian or Valentine?"

"I think it has to be Valentine. Police catched Sebastian before he could escape after he attacked you, he's probably in jail now."

Jace sighed, "Then Valentine will want revenge for his son being behind bars. He use any reason to make others suffer... Clary I don't want you to wander around alone. Especially late evening. He knows already that we're together. If he catch you, he catch me, and trust me- he won't fail to kill me. I'm not afraid of dying. But I'm afraid of what he'll do for you. Be cause I know for fact, even he kills me, he's not letting you go."

Clary swallowed, fear creeping into her. "What do we do now?" She whispered helplessly.

Jace kissed her lightly, "Right now, we sleep. Tomorrow, we'll discuss of that we leave the country. Valentine won't follow us anywhere out of his own safety nets. He got his men here to have his back- not everywhere."

"Where could we possibly go?"

Jace raised eyebrow, "Did you think my own parents left me nothing?"

"Huh?"

"I own Wayland manor and everything that was left behind from my parents. It was in their will. They were prepared for accidents. Currently, Robert's cousin lives there to look after the place, but I still own it."

Clary stared at him, "You- own a manor?"

Jace nodded a little, "I own a lot of things, but all I need... Is right here in my arms." He said and shushed her with a kiss.

** Yet again, I want to thank for all reviews! It makes me so happy to know you like the story. **

**So Jocelyn is back, Jace is getting well, and Valentine's on their tracks. **

** Hm, what a funny coincidence that Jocelyn's back and Valentine's after Clary at the same time- don't you think? **

***Shrugs* Oh well, good thing there's always good old Luke to bring peace and gorgeous Golden Boy to save the day. **

** Little snake peek to future, I can tell you this much: Magnus will have his impressive entrance, Sebastian is not held back that easily, and Jace might or might not have a little secret that even Lightwoods don't know, but it keeps haunting him from his past. **

** 'till next time! **

**Delicately Dark.**

** xxx **


	13. Spark of Challenges

Clary woke up at the feather light kisses traveling down her neck.

"Hmm, good morning." She murmured sleepily and Jace looked up to her face, smiling at her sleepy expression and kissed her lips lightly.

"Good morning... You know, you're awfully adorable when you're asleep."

Clary felt her cheeks starting to burn and she buried her face to Jaces chest, "Stop it."

Jace just laughed, stroking her hair tenderly. "We should go to breakfast before Maryse run in to check are we going nasty things to each other."

Clary chuckled, "What kind of nasty things?"

Jace raised eyebrow, his golden gaze wandering down her body and he tilted his head to the side, leaning over her.

"Something like- this" He said, tickling her sides then.

Clary giggled, trying to make his stop tickling her.

"No! No, Jace stop it!"

"Shh, you make it sound very suspicious." Jace laughed.

Sure enough, the door opened but in doorway was Izzy instead of angry Maryse.

Izzy crossed her arms, "Damn it, I thought I'd catch you doing something little more exciting. Mom sent me to tell breakfast is ready."

Jace chuckled, getting off the bed and stretched his arms, wincing slightly.

Izzy frowned, "You should take it easy Jace."

Clary couldn't see Jace's face, but she guessed that he was frowning as well.

"I'm fine Iz, stop fussing."

Izzy held her hands up, "Fine, have it your way, I'm just trying to be-"

Jace poked Izzy on the side lightly, "Annoyingly over worrying sister, Yeah, I got it."

Izzy looked like she was trying hard not to laugh, and then she turned around and left.

"Come on, we better go downstairs, next comes Maryse and she'd not leave us alone until we go with her."  
Clary nodded and crawled out of bed, yawning.

She felt unusually good and happy, like she haven't felt in long time.. That realizion strike small shiver of fear down her spine-All good things were followed by stragedy.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Jace frowned.

She shook her head, "Nothing."

"Liar." Jace said, so simply- it hurt her.

"I'm- not a liar."

"You are. I see that something bothers you and you deny it, so you lie to me. Why?"

Clary sighed, "I'm just worried."

"About?"

"Everything. Jocelyn being back, Valentine being after us... You're still recovering and you do should take it easy-"

She was shushed with gentle kiss on her lips, and Jace murmuring against her mouth: "There isn't such problem we can't find solutions together, okay?"

Clary nodded, smiling, "Okay."

Jace indicated her to follow, and she stood up- following him to kitchen.

"Love birds arrived." Izzy said.

Maryse looked up from newspaper, "Good morning... Jace, you couldn't put a shirt on? This is kitchen, we all know you look great, thank you very much."

Jace rolled his eyes, "Well I didn't quite come to think of that I need to please everyone in place I'm supposed to call home. And surprisingly you never minded it before. You think Clary haven't seen me like this before?"

Clary blushed, trying to hide behind Jace from Maryse's sharp look.

"I'm sure she has." Maryse said, sounding colder than Clary would have thought she could.

Jace narrowed his eyes, "Do you have something against her, Maryse?" His voice was equally colder, harsh, in a way that made Clary regret she was there. She shouldn't have come here. Now she had ruined everything in their family as well. She should have thought about this before running to Lightwood's house. She had been so selfish to run to Jace with every little trouble she got.

"I- I'm uhm- I just g-go... "She muttered, backing away slowly, but Jace took hold of her wrist to stop her.

She dared to peak through her lashes to him. He looked at her with such longing it made her want to pounce on him and hold him as tight as she possibly could.

He shook his head, "Don't."

Izzy had been quiet all this time- watching her mother and brother from corner. Now she cleared her throat.

"Mom, could you-"

"Isabelle, I'm speaking with Jace now." Maryse snapped and Izzy looked hurt, leaving the room, her black hair swinging behind her.

Jace looked back to Maryse, without letting go of Clary.

"What's your problem Maryse? Really- what's your problem?" Jace asked.

"We need to talk Jace, in private." Maryse answered.

Jace made sarcastic chuckling sound, "And Clary can't hear it because-?"

"Because this is not any of her business Jonathan! In the living room, now."

Clary tried to pull back, but Jace held her wrist too tight. She tapped his arm lightly, "Jace.. I'll just go outside to wait.. Okay? I- I don't want any trouble to you."

Jace didn't seem to hear her. He was staring at Maryse with cold look in his golden eyes.

"We're leaving." He said. "You can tell Robert to call his cousin to get himself hell out of my house. I'm moving back home. My own home."

Maryse gasped, "Jonathan.."

"Jace. And we're done." Jace said, taking Clary with him back upstairs in his room.

"J-jace.. Are you sure-"

"We're leaving Clary. We drop by at your place to get everything you need and we leave."

Clary swallowed, "But Luke.. I can't just disappear."

"Leave him a note." Jace said, packing his things.

Clary didn't know what to do. She wanted to go with Jace, be with him for rest of their lives- but how could she just leave Luke like that? But the again- Jocelyn would be there for him.

Thought of Jocelyn made Clary suddenly understand how Jace felt. They simply needed to get away from all this.

"What about your apartment?" She asked.

"I share it with Alec. We moved out together since it was easier than trying to find two apartments, and basically- it was more fun to move together than alone. He's gonna be fine there alone now."

Clary nodded. "How we're going to travel? I have never traveled anywhere."

"We take a bus from here and go to airport." Jace said, zipping his bag closed and shrugged a black t-shirt on and his leather jacket over it. "Come on."

He took his back and gripped Clary's hand, leading her downstairs.

"Jace, you can't just leave like that." Maryse said, sounding almost panicking.

"Just watch me." Jace hissed, opening the door and pushed Clary out as soon as she had got her shoes on.

"Jace! It's not safe for you to go there on your own!"

"I'm not a kid Maryse! I can take care of myself."

"And you put Clary in danger like that?"

"I can take care of her better than you can take care of me." Jace snapped and go to his motorcycle, pulling Clary to sit behind him. "Hold on."

She nodded and wrapped her arms tightly around him.

When they stopped in front of Luke's house, Jace turned to look at her, "Do you want me to come with you?"

She nodded, her heart was pounding so hard it threatened to break her ribgace.

He followed her inside, looking around while they made their way to her room.

"I don't need much." Clary said and took out a backbag.

"We can buy you new clothes and such."

Clary packed herself some clothes and art suplies, toothbrush and some other necessary things.

"I'm good to go."

Jace nodded and turned around, their way was blocked by Jocelyn Fray, who gasped when her eyes met Jace's.

"You.."

"Well hello to you too." Jace said coldly, "Mind moving your ass out of the way?"

"You two know each other?" Clary asked more from Jace than Jocelyn.

"Yeah.. We've run to each other every now and then while she was screwing Valentine."

Clary looked at Jocelyn with wide eyes. "You- How could you?!"

Jace took hold of her arm and pushed Jocelyn out of their way.

Jocelyn took hold of Clary's other hand to keep her from going, "Clary you can't go with him!"

"Yes I can! And I will. I'm adult now, you have no right whatsoever to try stop me."

"Clary, he's a murderer!"

Jace tensed and turned to look at Jocelyn with cold look in his golden eyes.

"And if I recall right, that's because of a man you fucked every time I saw you."

"W-what is this about?" Clary asked. She pulled her hand free from Jocelyn and gripped Jace's arm.

Jace looked at her, his eyes hid well the pain inside, but she could see it.

"Jace what happened?"

"He murdered a child!" Jocelyn said.

Jace's gaze snapped back at Jocelyn, "No, I put that kid out of its misery after your lover tortured it. That kid would have died damn slowly and painfully after all Valentine did to it."

Clary gasped, turning to look at Jocelyn. "I can't believe you can even be around that man!"

"And I can't believe you can be around that!" Jocelyn snapped back pointing at Jace.

Clary turned away, trying to pull Jace with her, "Come on.. Lets go."

"We can't just turn our back that bitch." Jace said, "The minute we go out of that door, she calls to Valentine to come after us. Don't you?"

Jocelyn held her chin up, "Why would I want to harm my own child?"

"Clary's not your child. You lost your right to call her your child when you left her to go fuck around with Valentine."

"He's her father!"

Clary gasped, "W-what?"

"Valentine Morgenstern is your father."

Clary felt dizzy. She leaned to Jace for support.

"But.. But Sebastian-"

"Is you brother." Jocelyn said. Seemingly proud of her son.

"And a criminal who raped her." Jace hissed.

Jocelyn seemed uneffected by these news.

Jace let go of Clary and she had to lean against the wall. She felt sick. Like her stomach was filled with snakes.

Jace go to Jocelyn and searched her even she tried to stop him.

"Knifes, chains?" He whistled, "Like mother, like son..." Then he went on. "Ah, and phone." He smashed it against he wall.

"You're not ruining Clary's life anymore than you already have."

"I know where you're going Wayland. You're not taking her there."

"Your lover might be tough Jocelyn, but I'm unstoppable if I want something bad enough. Maybe your son has told you about that."

Jocelyn shivered. "You're murderer."

"No. I'm protector. And I don't give a damn what happens to me in that process if I know- I will get Clary hell away from you and your men." Jace said, knocking Jocelyn out but he catched her, settling her to he floor carefully.

"Come on, she won't be unconscious for long and she'll find Valentine. We have to get out of here before Valentine knows we're leaving."

Clary felt so dizzy she couldn't move. Jace touched her cheek, "Clary? Clary look at me."

She did. His eyes were gentle when he gazed into her eyes, "She's not hurt. She'll wake up soon and all she'll have is headache... We need to leave."

"I-it's that I'm worried about.."

"Then what?"

"You."

Jae frowned, and she explained, "I don't want you to suffer because of me." She sobbed.

He shook his head and pulled her in tight hug, kissing her forehead.

"I'm fine. As long as I'm with you, I'm fine.. Come on, we need to leave." He lifted her up and carried her out.

"Do you think you can hold on to me?"

She nodded and they got on his bike, quickly leaving towards airport.


	14. Spark of Escape

Jace left his motorcycle in front of a hotel near by he airport, so if-and most likely when, Valentine would come after them, he would first have to check the hotel through in case they were there.

But Jace had got them a taxi to take them to airport, and he had already arranged tickets for them to next fly to England, where Wayland manor was located to.

Clary had never been to England before, and when Jace had shown her old picture of the manor she had got strange longing feeling for the place. It looked like home she always dreamed about when she was little girl. She really, really wanted to go there and see the place by herself.

They run to the airport when taxi stopped in front of it, Jace leading the way while Clary tried to follow as fast as possible. She had pushed her mother and Morgenstern's out of her mind right now, thinking of them made her only feel sick, and she needed to focus now. But she knew that she won't be able to avoid it forever. She already felt need to lock herself in bathroom and just- No. She had promised Jace she won't... But she couldn't help thinking about it.

Jace took hold of her hand, waking her back to reality.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing.. Nothing, this is all just happening so fast." She said, trying to smile to him.

Jace leaned closer to her, kissing her forehead, "We have 45 minutes, are you hungry?"

Clary nodded a little, "I kinda am."

"Come on." Jace said, leading her to cafeteria.

"Jace, there's something I don't understand."

"What's that?" Jace asked.

Clary took deep breath, "How do we pay all this? I mean- fly to England, our living, everything."

Jace raised eyebrow and pulled her closer, whispering to her ear: "My parents had savings for "rainy days" and they had savings for my future- which Lightwoods kept collecting to me as well while I was still little. Letting alone that I have worked for few years now. I have my own savings. Clary- we could pratically live our lives in there without doing anything for few years. Though I need something to keep me busy time to time- so I'm going to work there. And you, you can do anything you want. There's good chances for you to go study anything, work anywhere. Or just stay home and take it easy."

Clary's eyes got wide, she had known that Jace wasn't exactly any poor guy- but he was actually rich. Like- really rich.

"I.. I will try find job there. I can't just let you pay everything.. It's- it's not fair.. You've already done so much for me."

Jace shook his head, "Clary, I don't want you to think you're in debt to me. I do this because I want to. And if you want to work and make good career because you dream of it and enjoy it- I want you to do it. But if you want to stay home, take it easy and take your time to think what you possibly even want from your life- then I really want you to just stay home and take your time."

"But Jace-"

"No buts. Money doesn't mean anything to me. I know we need it for living but Clary we have enough to survive just fine, and we'll get more when I find job there. It's not necessary for you to stress about it now. Just let me try and make you happy."

Clary was speechless, and Jace used this as his chance to change subject.

"Do you want chicken or tuna sandwich?"

Clary blinked, "What?"

"A sandwich." Jace said, "Chicken or tuna?"

"Chicken.."

Jace nodded, "Go find us a table, I'll bring our food. You take coffee?"

Clary nodded few times and looked around for empty table, finding one from the corner and she went to sit down.

Her stomach grumbled already and her head hurt. She wished that the sandwich would be really big, and she hoped more than anything that she would be able to get some sleep in airplaine while they were going to England.

Jace brought a tray to the table and Clary's eyes got wide. Sure he had got them sandwiches, and coffee, with muffins and cookies.

"Jace?"

"Yep?"

"What's the muffins and cookies for?"

"Dessert." Jace said and handed her a sandwich, which she took eagerly and bite down to it, her stomach grumbling again.

Jace looked at her slightly amused, "You should have say earlier that you're hungry."

Clary blushed, "I.. I wasn't so hungry before."

Jace smiled and took a bite from his food, "I think it's good you eat well. I hate those anorexic princesses. You sure as hell are not going to ever become one of them. I'd hate it if I had to worry about your bones crushing if I hug you."

Clary smiled at that, "Me? Anorexic? Not gonna happen. I love food too much."

Jace looked pleased at that. She was secretly thankful for that Jace thought this way- otherwise she would have probably feel nervous of eating in his company, considering Jace had absolutely perfect body.

Well that thought made her suddenly less hungry, and she put down her half eaten sandwich.

Jace seemed to sense her sudden mood chance and he frowned, "What is it? Does it taste bad?"

"N-no.. " Clary shook her head and took sip of her coffee, then she put her "I'm fine" smile on her face. "I just needed to have something to drink. It felt little dry."

Jace didn't seem too convinced, "I can go get you juice or something with it if you want."

"No, no... It's good like this." She said and took another bite, just to keep Jace from fussing more over her.

Jace kept an eye on her until she had finished her sandwich. She felt full now, and she really wished that Jace wouldn't have brought those muffins and cookies- which he of course pushed closer to her now.

She shook her head, "I'm fine now. Thank you."

Jace narrowed his eyes. "What did I just say?"

"A-about what?"

"You're not going to become one of those anorexic princesses, and you sure as hell are not starving yourself. I did see that something made you suddenly want to leave that sandwich as well, and just by the way- your stomach is still grumbling. So what is it that makes you do this?"

Clary looked down to her coffee cup. "I'm just nervous about all this."

"It didn't seem to bother you so much at first."

Clary swallowed, Jace would dig the truth out of her in way or another.

She sighed, "I just.. I mean-"

He reached his hand across the table and took hold of her hand. "Clary, look at me."

She did. She was always so compelled to do what he asked.

"What's wrong? And I don't mean just everything that's going on.. "

"It's just.. You're always so perfect. I- it kinda makes me feel stupid. I- I don't ever look so good.. I'm terribly lazy and I u-usually like to eat well.. I just- "

"Shh." Jace got up and pulled her to stand up. Then he walked over and sat down to her place, pulling her to sit on his lap.

Then he took a chocolate muffin and broke a piece of it, feeding it to her: "I've seen those girls who are think like stick, and to be honest it makes sick. I don't find them attractive. I find them pitiful. And I really hate to worry about that will their bones truly crush if I hold them tight. I don't mind that if you gain weight, you should- actually. You're pale, paler than you was when I met you. And you're getting so small I will soon have hard time find you if I take you to a walk in park. You'd disappear behind trees. As long as you feel good, you're perfect for me."

Clary blushed, licking her lips. "That was good."

Jace smiled and held the muffin for her to take a bite, and she did. She felt suddenly much better, and it sure was yummy muffin as well.

"Jace, wait, wait.." She shook her head, trying not to laugh and took a sip from her coffee, now truly needing something to wash everything down.

He kept feeding her with another muffin, until she took a cookie from plate and held it for him.

He opened his mouth and she feed it to him. He nipped her fingers lightly, causing her jump a little and giggle then.

"Heeey, that wasn't nice."

He shrugged, "Well I had to test are you as sweet as you seem."

Clary blushed and buried her face to his shoulder, "Shush!"

Jace rubbed her back soothingly for while, then she felt him tense.

"Clary... Don't look behind you." he whispered, taking off his jacket and put it on her, hiding her hair under the hood.

They stood up and he lead her out of cafeteria.

"Lets go, we will get into our plane soon. We can go through check now. He won't be able to follow us without ticket."

"He?"

"Valentine's here."

Clary sucked her breath in.

"Just keep walking, he haven't seen us yet and after we go through the check- he won't be able to come there."

"O-okay.."

Jace looked over his shoulder, his eyes searching.

"I lost him.."

Clary was about to look back but he turned her around and pushed her forward. He pushed her to security check and she went through it, waiting for him.

"Wayland!"

Clary's heart stopped, Valentine was hurrying towards them.

Jace got through the check just in time when guards stopped Valentine, asking him to wait his turn in line.

"Go.. Go! He can pay his way through if he wants."

Clary hurried through the hall when she heard screams behind. Jace didn't let her look back, he just kept telling her to keep going, and she did.

When she got in plane, she turned back to look at Jace, who wasn't behind her anymore.

"Jace? Jace?!"

"Is something wrong?" Nice looking little older lady who had come in after her asked.

"Uhm.. Did you see a blonde boy?"

"Yes, he went back to the check. I think was saying he forgot something in there."

Clary's heart froze, and at the same moment- she heard several gunshots.

_Jace! Valentine was here for him... Oh god, please let Jace be alright. _

The doors were closing.

"No, wait! Jace hasn't come in yet!"

"Most travelers have not, but this is for security. Doors will be opened when situation is over."

Clary sat down, burying her face to her hands, tears streaming down her face.

Not again! She couldn't lose Jace again. She simply couldn't.

"Well, well. That was one hell of a show" A male voice said. "And you- sobbing sweetheart, are on my place."

Clary sniffed, looking up to see black haired man who- wore make up?

"I- I'm sorry.." Clary mutered and got up.

"Well I can't say it's pleasure to meet you sweetheart since you're sobbing so dramatically, but I'm Magnus Bane. And that you- I take it, are with that hot golden piece of meat that run around saving others lives from the maniac over there."

Clary was speechless.

"Hello? Earth to sweetheart, what's ya name? And who's that golden boy?"

"H-he's Jace.."

"Jace... I like that. And you are?"

"C-Clary.."

"Nice name, I was already worrying your name would be something boring. It would have broke my heart if you had boring name."

Clary blinked, too confused to even cry anymore.

Who was this guy? Well okay- Magnus Bane, but... Was he serious?

"Anyway, since you obviously got nothing better to do than sob hysterically over your hero boyfriend, you can keep me company." Magnus said and sat down.

"o-okay.."

Magnus smiled teasingly, "Is he good?"

"What?"

"That Jace, is he good in bed?"

Clary blushed bright red, "I- I wouldn't k-know.."

"Ahaa, but I think you will find that out soon, won't you? Heck, I would if I was you my girl, he looks like he's real deal. Sorry sweetheart but you gotta learn to share that eyecandy for looks. Watch no Touch. He's just too damn sexy not to be looked at."

"H-he probably is..." Clary said quietly, wishing she wouldn't blush so hard.

Magnus frowned, "Are you still so shocked, or are you nervous because of me?"

"What?"

"You're stuttering sweetheart."

Clary swallowed.. "I'm.. Worried."

"Well of course. I'd be worried if my boyfriend was that hot and run around saving others but not me."

"He- never mind."

"Oh no, tell me. I'd love to hear more of him. Does he have brother by any chance?"

Okay.. He's gay.

"Uhm... Yeah, sort of."

"Sort of?"

"A-adopted brother."

Magnus sighed, "Damn it. I so liked his hair.. So what kind of guy his brother is?"

Clary would have never guessed that she would ever have a conversation about Alec with strange gay guy, since she hardly even knew Alec. Oh well- but here she was, finding herself answering list of questions Magnus kept fairing to her.

Finally the doors opened again and Clary stood up, her eyes searching for Jace.

He didn't come in with others, and there were only very few seats anymore left. Doors would close soon...

Magnus took hold of her wrist, "Don't go there sweetheart. He will come."

"How can you know that?!"

Magnus seemed to get serious for once, "I know things. And I know for sure that your Jace will go through a diamond walls to come back to you. Count on it."

"Wait! Here is still one."

One of security guards was helping Jace to stay on his feet. "He will need medical care. Band-aids at least. He got quite beaten."

Jace was barely conscious, but his golden eyes were searching people around him.

Magnus's hold loosened and Clary run to Jace.

He was beaten, he had bloody bruises on his arms, few scratches on his cheek and one little bigger, nasty looking scratch near to his hairline, but he smiled when he saw her, wrapping his arms around her.

"Clary.. "

"Are you alright?! I was so worried... Why you went back?"

"I'll live.. I just couldn't leave all those people face him.. I distracted him outside. Security called police.. Valentine's going jail.." Jace said, and then he fell unconscious.

"Jace?!" Clary tried to hold him, but he was too heavy for her o hold up alone.

Magnus came behind her and said: "Let me help you with your nommy boyfriend, he doesn't look too well to me right now, and I even like all sweaty and bloody hero styles sometimes. Makes it hot..." Then he noticed Clary's glaring look and his expression got softer while he helped Clary to get Jace down to chair and get the chair in sleeping position. "I go find first-aid kit." He said, and Clary just nodded, stroking Jace's hair tenderly. "You will be fine.. I swear you will.. I will take care of you this time. This time- I won't let you down."


	15. Spark of Doubts

"Sweetheart, would you stop already?" Magnus sighed. He had switched seats with several people so he was seated beside Jace and Clary, and even Clary didn't know yet what to really think of Magnus- she was thankful for that he was there now.

He had helped Clary clean up Jace's injuries and cover them, and even Clary knew it was stupid, she felt hint of jealousy of the way Magnus looked at Jace. He sure didn't hide his interest, but admired Jace's physical form. Though, true to his own words, he never touched Jace. Well- beside actually helping him, which Clary was thankful for.

"I'm sorry." Clary sighed and stopped tapping the windowseal with her bitten nails.

Jace hadn't woken up yet, but Magnus had said it might as well be good sign. That Jace was resting now and would probably be quite fine when he did wake up next time.

"It would be worse if he tried to force himself stay awake, he'd be just more exhausted and he wouldn't recover so fast."

Magnus had said.

Clary was tired, her head hurt and her eyes felt itchy and she wished nothing more but to fall asleep beside Jace, but something just kept nagging at her in back of her head.

Something- strange overpowering protectiveness of Jace when he was unable to defend himself.

She would not let anything happen to him now. She just won't allow it.

"Why don't you take this and try to relax?" Magnus said, handing her small pill.

She looked suspicious, "What's that?"

"It's sleeping pill. It's mild medicine, just helps you to relax so you can sleep better."

Clary swallowed, how could she truly trust Magnus?

"I- I don't know."

"Look, I'd be First Class Total Moron if I tried anything funny on you, while you got your golden sex-god next to you. He'd beat the hell out of me if he realized his Pretty Princess has been drugged. And I kinda like you my girl. With your worry-stuttering and all. Adorable."

Clary stood up, "I- I go to bathroom first.. W-would you-?"

"Look after your boyfriend?" Magnus finished and nodded, "I'm on him like hawk."

Clary frowned, not exactly answer she would have hoped, but she needed to go.

She could feel Magnus looking after her when she went, locking herself in small bathroom.

She looked around. There was nothing- absolutely nothing she could use to... Then she sighed, she shouldn't be doing this.

Looking at herself from mirror, she took off her ear-ring and pierced a small hole to her finger. Yep- sharp enough with little pressure.

She go to the sink and got water running, washing her ear-ring and pulled up her sleeve.

Her arms were pale, old scars standing out clearly in bright light.

So she bit her lip, consider it one more time... What she would tell Jace when he noticed it?

She rolled the sleeve down. Jace would be hurt.

Try as she might to fight the urge to get her stress and worries out, she failed. She tied her hair up, leaning close to the mirror and pressed the needle of ear-ring to skin of her neck, scratching it several times across her skin, finally breaking through and thin scratch was dripping blood.

_Just one more time.. Just once. Once more._

She blinked and sucked her breath in. The scratch wasn't just dripping anymore. Blood was running down her throat and stained her shirt.

"Damn it!" She quickly took some handtowels and pressed them against her neck.

There was knock on the door.

"Is everything alright in there?"

"Y-yes.. just a moment!" Clary answered, pure panic hitting her.

Her eyes searched around bathroom, First-aid kit! Magnus had said he found it from bathroom... Finally she found it, quickly opening it and took out band-aids, covering the wound of her neck, getting her hair down to hide it.

She washed the blood from sink and her ear-ring, putting it back on her ear and took quick look around: everything was as it should be. No blood anywhere.

She opened the door and excused herself to go back to her place.

She felt light headed.

Magnus's eyes narrowed, "Isn't it kinda inappropriate time to go take care of your feminine needs?"

"W-what?!" Clary's eyes got wide.

"Well you sure took your sweet time. I thought you were-"

"Would you mind? Really?! Everything is not always about sex!"

Magnus held his hands up, "Okay, okay, take it easy sweetheart."

"Name is Clary. Stop calling me sweetheart." Clary snapped and sat back down to her place next to Jace, who made sleepy sound, turning his head a little but didn't wake up.

Clary rested her head to Jace's shoulder. She felt tired. So tired... If she just closed her eyes, she could tell herself that nothing was wrong, that they were on their way to England and Jace was just fallen asleep already, and she should too.

"Clary." Magnus's voice called when she was somewhere in between of falling asleep and being distantly awake.

"Hm.."

"Clary, which one of you is bleeding?"

_Bleeding?... Jace is not-_ Her eyes got wide open, "What?"

Magnus was leaning over her and Jace, his unusual brown-green eyes scanning both of them, serious look on his typically playful face.

"Clary, what's that on your neck?"

"Nothing! It's nothing. I'm fine."

"Oh no you're not sweetheart. And you have just won a trip back to bathroom- and guess what? I'm coming with you." Magnus said and pulled her to her feet even she tried to protest.

"Don't you worry sweetheart, we can have awesome Girl-talk of your golden sex god while I stitch you back together, I'm good at that stuff. Trust me."

Magnus didn't sound like he was joking, so Clary guessed this was actually his nature. Being like half joking and teasing all the time.

"Magnus I'm fine!"

"Depends from angle, and from the side I'm looking from- baby you have seen better days than this one." Magnus said and pushed Clary to bathroom.

He moved Clary's hair to one side, ripping off the band-aid she had put there to cover her newest scratch.

"You won't- by any chance happen to have a tiger as a pet? And I'm not talking about your man now, no doubt he's a tiger when he gets in business, I mean the animal version now. You know, that orange-black buddy in jungle?"

Clary sighed, "Magnus it's just a scratch. I'm fine."

"It ain't a scratch. You're going to get stitches when we land in England. Your boyfriend will not like this."

"Clary?" They heard Jace's voice from distance, and without thinking it any better, she run out of bathroom to Jace.

He was on his feet now, looking exhausted but all in all standing on his own two feet.

He smiled a little at first when he saw her, then his eyes narrowed, "You're hurt?"

Then his golden gaze traveled to Magnus who came out of bathroom as well and he looked so utterly disbelieved and betrayed that Clary's heart ached.

"Jace, it's not what it looks like, I swear!"

Few people were watching them, most travelers were sleeping- which Clary was really thankful for.

Magnus walked pass Clary and held out his hand to Jace, "Magnus Bane."

Jace narrowed his eyes coldly, "Do I look like I give a damn who the hell you are?"

Magnus looked hurt. "Easy tiger, I was not making out wit your sweetheart. I was trying to stitch her back together. She's cutie, but not my type. I'd say you're more my type."

Jace blinked, looking momentarily so confused it was almost funny.

"What?"

Magnus put his hand on his hip and indicated other hand to Clary, "Your sweetheart here is my new BFF, and all, since we both are so into you. But I just take the eyecandy part. I might want your brother's phone number though. But to the point: when I got here, your sweetheart was on my place, we killed time chatting and I kinda like her. She stutters when she's worried, it's cute. And then, then I helped her stitch you back together after your heroic moment was over. And now, I noticed blood on your shirt that wasn't there before, and it turned out you're not the one bleeding, it's your sweetheart here. And I thought it would be better stitch her back together before you get up- not such luck."

Jace took deep breath, processing all this in his mind.

"Did I talk too fast?" Magnus asked.

"No.. I think got it." Jace said.

Clary went to Jace and took his hand in her own, "How are you feeling?"

Jace looked at her, his eyes were sad. So, so utterly sad. But his voice was steady when he leaned closer and lowered his voice so only she heard him.

"You did it again, didn't you? You did that on purpose.. Even you knew what you put me through with that."

Clary looked down, ashamed of herself. "I'm sorry Jace.. I really am!"

He shook his head and just nodded to Magnus before he sat back down and closed his eyes to sleep.

"I told ya." Magnus said, throwing his hands up and sat back down as well.

When they landed to England, Jace just got up and lead Clary out. He didn't talk to her, neither did he answer if she asked something from him. He was angry. She knew he was.

"Jace! Clary!"

They turned to look back, seeing Magnus come after them.

"Do you guys need a ride?" He asked. "I could take you to hospital to get sweetheart taken care of, I'm going that way anyway."

"It'd be great." Jace nodded.

Magnus indicated them to follow him, and they stopped in front of bright red sportcar.

"Jump on in." Magnus grinned when he opened the doors.

Jace shrugged and got in, Clary following him.

"Mind me asking where you guys plan on staying?" Magnus asked when he pulled off to the driveway.

"I live here... I mean, we live here. She's coming with me to my childhood home."

"Cutie! Your parents will love your girl."

"My parents are dead. We go live there together now."

Magnus looked at Jace and then focused on to road ahead again. "There isn't much empty houses around here." He said, more to himself than to Jace.

"It's not a house exactly. A manor."

Magnus's eyes got wide, "Fairchild manor or Wayland manor?"

"Wayland manor, why?"

Magnus stopped the car and openly stared at Jace. "Jonathan Wayland, aren't you?"

Jace narrowed his eyes, "Yes... Why?"

Magnus shook his head and said, "Nothing, it's just that no body knew what happened to you after your parents- you know.. Some say you were murdered along with them, some say you went missing, some say-"

"I was adopted. My host family lives in New York." Jace said and his tone told clearly that he wasn't going to talk about this anymore than that.

Magnus nodded and stopped in front of the hospital, handing Jace a card, "You know, give me a call sometimes if you want to hang out- just friends. I don't get involved with taken guys, no matter how good looking."

Jace took it and put it in his pocket. "We'll see. Thanks for the ride." Then he opened the door and pulled Clary with him in the hospital.

"Jace I'm fi-"

"Shut up!" Jace hissed and Clary winced.

"I'm sorry.. I'm sorry Jace, I really am."

Jace just pulled her inside and called the nurse, holding Clary still while a nurse checked the scratch, indicating them to sit down to wait so doctor will stitch it.

Jace didn't look at her, nor talk to her, and she wondered would he sent her back to New York.

When the doctor came and took care of the wound, Jace was asked to wait outside the room.

Clary was fearing that he won't be waiting for her at all, but when she came out of the room, she found him leaning against the wall- looking bored.

He listened carefully the doctors advices how to treat her now on until she was healed, then he paid the bill of her treatment and dragged her outside.

She pulled her hand from his grip, "Seriously Jace! I can't take this anymore! Just talk to me!"

He turned to look at her, "Why? You don't talk to me, you find your own freaking way to get things out of yourself. Why should I bother to talk to you?"

She froze. "But Jace.. "

"Shut up and come along. I want to get home so I can get some sleep." Jace said tiredly and called taxi to get them.

Clary looked down to her feet, trying hard not to cry.

_Never again.. Never! I promise that Jace. Never again. _


	16. Spark of Remedy

"Jace, it's gorgeous." Clary gasped when they arrived to Wayland manor.

Jace didn't say anything, but opened the front gate and closed it behind Clary.

Door opened and they was black haired young woman standing there.

"Aline, didn't Robert call you?" Jace asked.

"He did. But I need to talk to you Jace."

Jace pushed her aside and went inside, "That's Clary, she's gonna be living here with me." He said like it didn't quite matter.

Aline nodded to Clary as she followed Jace in.

"Jace I really don't have any-" Aline started to say.

"Then you stay in guestroom." Jace said, dropping his bag to the floor.

Aline nodded, "I have always been in guest room. It would have been too weird for me to be in-"

"Yeah, Aline, I go it." Jace huffed. His annoyance seemed to make Aline- afraid?

Clary frowned, "Jace?"

His golden eyes turned to her. The usual gentleness she had so used to see in them, was gone. His expression was unreadable. Like he had put on walls between them so she couldn't reach him.

She wanted to ask how he felt coming back in this place, where he had witnessed of his own parents deaths, but he would not answer to her, she knew it already.

Jace made his way upstairs and Clary sighed, Aline tapping on her shoulder:"What's with him?"

"It's my fault."

"What you mean? Look, Clary-right? Jace has never brought anyone in here. He visited here once with Alec but they left almost right away. My mother was still living here back then. My mother died few months ago- and now I got no other place to go."

"I- I think.. Jace will understand. H-he won't just throw you out... And it's- it's huge house. Manor."

They heard faint sounds of water running from upstairs.

"There's bathrooms included in bedrooms, he must be in.. Master bedroom. His parents old room." Aline said.

"Is there more than one guestroom?" Clary asked.

"There is all in all eight bedrooms that are still in condition to use. Down in basement is two, servants has used to live there long, long time ago. Now they just serve the purpose of being part of the basement."

"Wow.."

Aline nodded. "Do you want upstairs or the room next to mine in downstairs?"

Clary thought. She wanted to be near to Jace, she really did. She felt like she was addicted to him, and she was getting in desperate need for his nearness, but she knew he won't welcome her close to him.

"Go upstairs." Aline said, "There's five bedrooms there. If he brought you to live here with him, I can't imagine him minding you being there."

Clary looked to the staircase, "I guess.."

Aline smiled, "Come on, I show you my favorite guestroom there." She leaded Clary upstairs, opening door from left.

It was like those princess rooms from fairytales, with big, white bed and silk sheets. Everything was either white, or slight shade of gold.

"Story has it that Jace's mother wanted a baby girl as well, so she made this room ready in case she would some day have a another baby."

Clary felt sick twist in her stomach of thinking how Jace's parents had died.

The sound of running water stopped, and Aline made her way back downstairs.

"Just make yourself at home, if he has something against you being there- tell him it was my idea."

Clary sighed, closing the door behind her and clicked lights on, settling her bag to the bed.

This was like dream home. But she longing feeling to it had disappeared when Jace didn't seem to want her there. Though she didn't know what else she could do. She had no money and nothing else really either that could help her survive on her own.

Sighing, she went to bathroom and her mouth fell open. It was perfect.

There was huge bathtub and of course- other necessary things bathrooms needed to have, but still- it was perfect.

She listened for while but heard nothing, so she stripped out of her clothes and decided to take just quick shower, even she had always wanted to take a real bubble bath- but she didn't feel like she'd deserve it, and she felt already unwelcome here. She didn't want to make it worse.

After her shower she wrapped soft, white towel around herself and went back to the bedroom, freezing into her place when she saw Jace there, without a shirt, wearing only comfortable looking black sweatpants. His hair was messy, and not totally dried yet.

He was- uh uhuh, that's right: Hot.

She blushed and quickly looked down, "I'm sorry I-"

"Shh" He murmured with low, husky whisper, coming to her and placed finger under her chin, making her look up. Then he leaned down and kissed her.

Shiver run down her spine and she leaned into him, responding to his kiss with slight desperation for begging his forgiveness of making him worry so much over her.

He pulled away, looking down at her with those breathtaking golden eyes. They seemed to get darker now. Or maybe it was just dim light of the room that made it seem like they were darker.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you like that... I just-"

"Shh." Clary shushed him this time, placing her finger to his lips. "You have right to be angry at me.. I broke my promise to you, and I was horribly selfish for not thinking how it hurts you... Now I promise, I promise- I will not do it again. Jace I'm sorry..I will- I will find another way to deal with things."

Jace blinked, and the darker shade she thought she saw in them, faded.

"It's okay.. You're fine now and that's all that matters."

"Jace... Are you alright? I mean- all this.. It must mean something to you to come back here."

Jace shrugged, stepping back and looked around, "Not really. It's not as hard as I thought it would be. Alec and I stopped by here once, it was just little check what's it like here and then we were gone. I wanted to come back. This is my home. One bad thing can't doom whole place when there's so many good memories in here as well."

Clary smiled, "Well I'm happy that you let me come in here with you. It's beautiful place."

Jace nodded and cleared his throat, "Well I just- let you get some sleep now.. I'll see you in morning."

She quickly took hold of his hand, "Jace wait."

He looked down to their joined hands and then to her eyes. "What?"

"I... I-"

Jace pulled his hand free and leaned to kiss her forehead, "Good night Clary." He said in strangely harsh whisper that shot another shiver down her spine, then he left.

Clary blinked, then she followed him.

"Jace!"

He stopped and turned around, frowning.

She closed the distance between them, standing right in front of him, not quite daring to touch him- even she wished nothing more but to have him hold her tight and never let her go.

"What?" He asked.

She suddenly felt much more confident, but also became very aware of that she only had a towel wrapped around herself- and he didn't have his shrit on.. Which was horribly distracting.

She felt her cheeks burn, but despite the heat on her face, it was nothing compared to feverish heat that vibrated from Jace's body.

Her eyes traveled down to his chest and perfect abs, and he probably noticed it, since he shifted a little on his place, asking again: "What?"

She looked up into his eyes. "Hold me Jace."

He blinked and opened his mouth to say something, but closed it then and just pulled her closer, hugging her tight against himself.

She could hear his heartbeats racing, though he seemed otherwise perfectly calm, while she had to put all her willpower in the effort to not run her hands down his perfect muscled body and kiss him until she forgot who she was.

And she failed.

She got on her toes and leaned up to kiss him, her hands running down his ribs and sides, feeling every muscle so clearly under his smooth skin.

And so failed his calm act as well, his mouth opening to respond to her kiss while he gripped of her waist, pushing her back against nearest wall and leaned his body close to hers.

When she kept trying to reach up on him, he made impatient noise and lifted her up, pinning her against the wall with his body so she was even little higher than he was. She gripped of his shoulders, wrapping her legs around his waist while he kissed down her neck, avoiding covered wound though.

"Is everything alright up there?" They heard Aline's voice from downstairs, and there was high chances she was coming upstairs soon.

Clary froze, but Jace didn't seemed effected. He lifted her up and took her to her room, kicking the door shut behind them.

When he settled her down to her bed, the towel loosened around her and fell open, barely covering her.

He swallowed, pulling back, but she took hold of his wrist and pulled him close, wrapping her legs around him again to keep him from moving.

"Clary.."

She let her fingers travel over his muscles, "Don't you want to?"

He took deep breath, "It's not about what I want.. It's about that you shouldn't do something you're not comfortable with.. I know what happened to you- it's-"

She shushed him with a kiss, her hands wandering to waistband of his pants, "I am comfortable with you.. You would never hurt me, I know it.. Jace I love you."

Shiver went down his spine, and she noticed his eyes darkening.

So that's what it was... No light tricks, it was merely an effect of desire.

She pulled him down to her, slipping her fingers under the waistband of his pants, tugging on the fabric to get them off of him, causing him make another restless and impatient noise, helping her to get rid of them.

She threw the towel away, leaning back to the pillows, her cheeks were burning but it hardly bothered her.

Nervousness was creeping into her, considering Jace looked like some god from greek's mythology, while she- well, she was just ordinary girl.

Though the look in his eyes told for something else when he leaned over her.

She gave him a small smile, and he bent down to kiss her cheeks, then her lips, so lightly it was nervewrackingly teasing.

She slid her hands along his chest to his shoulders and down his back, pulling him closer.

He kissed down her throat and chest, sucking small mark on her skin right above her racing heart, and she arched her back, biting hard on her own lip to stay quiet. And before she even had time to realize it, his hands were wandering down her sides and thigs, his fingers making small caressing motions over her skin.

She was shaking. Positively shaking of her own desire for him. She wished he would stop teasing her already, but she also- in some level appreciated that he took it slowly with her.

Yeah, but it was definitely too slow for her now. She wanted him, and she wanted him now.

She wrapped her legs tighter around him and pulled him closer, claiming his lips in passionate kiss.

He groaned against her mouth, his hands wandering along her skin, caressing it, causing her make that impatient noise now.

Jace smiled at her small whining noises, shushing her with a kiss. She was about tell him to stop teasing her already, when she felt him entering her, making her arch her back with soft moan escaping her lips.

Wave of pure desire washed over her and she found herself hanging on to Jace like her life was up to him, never wanting to let go. His touch sent electric tingles through her every nerve, and she just couldn't get enough of him.

Claiming his lips in deep, hungry kiss, she run her hands along his back, trying to pull him even closer, causing him moan and shiver, pressing himself closer to her.

If she wouldn't have been so lost in her passion, she might have been concerned about Aline hearing them, but right now she couldn't care, couldn't think.. Nothing else mattered but Jace.

She rolled over on top of him, pressing her hands to his chest, feeling how his heart was beating much faster than usually, his chest rising and falling fast.

His eyes were dark gold, but even they were clouded by the desire, she could see that loving gentleness in them she had always seen in him.

Then he pulled her down to kiss him hungrily, both of them moaning and whimpering by now. Clary arched her back when overwhelming vibrations of pleasure went through her, making her cry out and shiver. Same time Jace gasped, gripping from the bedsheets- almost tearing them.

"Clary?"

"Yeah?"

They were both breathing heavily, staying very still for a moment.

Jace blinked, looking up at her, "I love you."

She smiled and leaned down to kiss him, "Sure you say that now." She teased.

Jace made playful growling sound and rolled on top of her, "I mean it."

"I know.. But I still love you more."

Jace shook his head, almost touching her lips with his, whispering against her mouth; "Impossible"


	17. Spark of Betrayal

When Clary woke up, Jace was gone. Though his side of the bed was still warm, so he must have just left.

She sit up, and wrapped the blanket around herself before going to bathroom.

Looking at herself from mirror, she looked like she was glowing. She washed her face with cold water, enjoying the refreshing feeling and she pulled her hair up in messy bun, then she seached for new underwear and pulled them on just when she heard the door to bedroom open.

"Clary?"

She smiled, Jaces voice was deep and sleepy. She came out of bathroom and leaned to the door-frame.

"Hey there handsome."

Jace smiled when he saw her, setting down a tray of breakfast to her bedside table before coming to her, wrapping his arms around her.

He had pulled on his black pajama pants and Clary might have hoped he wouldn't have- until she remebered that Aline was downstairs and she suddenly became aware of that she might not be only one in this house finding Jace gorgeous. So she forgave him for ruining her perfect view of him.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked in low murmur, his breath tickling her neck.

She leaned in closer to him, hugging him tight, "Better than ever."

Jace trailed soft kisses along her neck until he reached her lips and kissed them. She could taste coffee from his lips.

"I brought you breakfast." He whispered against her lips, sending shiver down her spine.

"Why- oh why are you so perfect?" She asked with fake annoyance, making him laugh.

They sat down to the bed, leaning back to the pillows and Jace handed her cup of coffee and plate with sandwiches, eggs, fresh berries and fruits.

"You really are spoiling me." She said, suddenly feeling really emotional, tears filling her eyes and she tried to blink them away, but Jace noticed it anyway. What there would be that he didn't notice?

"Hey.. What's wrong?" He asked with soft whisper, his hand cupping her cheek gently.

She shook her head, "Nothing.. "She sniffed and rested her head against his chest. "I just never thought I could be so happy."

Jace kissed her forehead and wrapped his arms around her, running his hand in soothing circles across her back.

"I'll never let anything happen to you Clary.. And I'll never let you go. I love you."

She sobbed, nuzzling her face to crook of his neck, "I love you too."

Jace held her tight and run his hands soothingly up and down her spine until she calmed down, pulling back to look into his perfect golden eyes and he wiped tears from her cheeks, kissing them and then her lips.

"Our coffee will get cold soon." He whispered.

Clary giggled, pulling away from him to take her cup. "That would be terrible loss, wouldn't it?"

Jace shrugged, taking a sip from his cup, "Yeah, I should go back downstairs and make more of it- wasting good time to be with you."

Clary took a sip of coffee, it wasn't even nearly cold. It was perfect. Everything seemed suddenly so perfect, she felt like she was living in fairytale.

Jace stole few berries from her tray and popped them into his mouth.

"Heey! Those were mine." Clary said with pretended annoyance.

Jace shrugged again, "Seemed too tempting to resist, just like you, but I figured I can't eat you as a breakfast."

Clary felt her cheeks starting to burn. He did it again. God, she would never get used to his charms. So she was probably doomed to live with glowing red cheeks with rest of her life. It was small price to pay for living with such perfect man. And he never got tired of telling how cute he thought it was when she blushed- which was probably reason why he kept making her blush.

Soon they heard loud banging on the door and Jace frowned, getting up.

"Aline, what the hell you're doing here?" He asked, not bothering to hide his annoyance.

"You better come see this. Some freak has escaped from prison in New York and left note in his cell wall with blood."

"What that has anything to do with us?"

"The note said: I'm coming for you J. Wayland" Aline said.

Clary's heart stopped for a moment.. "Sebastian!"

Jace went back to her and wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight and protectively.

"He's not gonna get us from here. He doesn't even know we're here. Nobody knows."

Aline shifted on her place, "Jace, I think you should-"

"Aline, get your ass out of our bedroom. I'll see you later in kitchen." Jace said coldly.

He was pissed at that Aline decided to drop the news when Clary had just barely even woke up, and now she was sobbing hysterically, trembling with fear.

"H-he's going to g-get us killed... I knew I shouldn't h-have think everything c-could ever be fine.. This is all m-my fault!"

"Shh! it's not your fault that he's insane. And we're safe here. There's security locks in every door of this manor and no one can even pass the gate without us knowing it. Since my parents were murdered this place was made so secure no one can get close without us knowing it... Clary I swear nothing will happen to you. No one will ever hurt you again. I promise to protect you with my life."

Clary wrapped her arms so tight around Jace that she feared he would not be able to breathe.

"No! I don't want to lose you! I can't.."

"And you never will. Nothing can keep me from coming back to you."

Clary looked up into his eyes, "Don't go anywhere..."

Jace shook his head, "I'm not going anywhere Clary, it's just figure of speech, if there was anything to happen- nothing would hold me back to come to you."

Clary swallowed, tears streaming down her cheeks, "He's going to kill us.."

Jace frowned, "Clary, you're overthinking this. He can't get in here. By the time he has managed to anyhow pass the gates, we have had time to call police and they come here. How do you think Aline has been able to live here all by herself since her mother's death? She's safe here, that's how."

"But are you safe? He says he's coming for you!"

"He won't get me from here."

Clary hold on to him as tight as she could, "Promise me you won't go out to face him.. Promise me! He'd kill you... I- I can't lose you Jace! I love you!"

Jace run his hand in soothing circles across her back, trying to calm her down.

"Clary nothing is going to happen to us... We're safe here."

"h-he know you o-own this place... He'll come f-for us..."

"Would you feel better if we were somewhere else?"

"Where could we go?" Clary asked, looking into his eyes helplessly.

"Well I doubt Magnus Bane would mind if we visited him."

Clary blinked. She has forgot all about Magnus while her all focus had gone to Jace.

"B-but.."

Jace touched her cheek lightly. "Clary, I'd do anything for you... If you feel like you can't trust the security system here, we can go anywhere else you want. Right now, my only idea is to go hide to our friends. Because if we have no one around to help us- we expose ourselves much easier. Nobody is so stupid to attack on group of people. If we're surrounded by friends- Sebastian knows he doesn't stand a chance against us."

"B-but he might h-have a gun.."

"Even better reason to be surrounded with friends. It's hard to aim for tight group of people and if he doesn't want to ruin all his chances to live free life- he won't slaughter everyone."

Clary was trembling with fear and worry. She felt like she might pass out. Her heart beat painfully fast and she couldn't feel her hands anymore. She was in total panic. Panic over a thought of losing Jace again.

And he was there, holding her so tight nothing could have torn her away from him.

He kept whispering soothing words to her ear, stroking her hair and never loosen his hold of her until she had calmed down, only sobbing in his arms helpelessly.

"I-I-m.. S-sorry.."

"No, Clary, you have nothing to be sorry about." Jace said gently.

There was a knock on the door again, and Jace picked Clary up, holding her in his arms while he told Aline to open the door.

As Aline opened the door, Jace arried Clary out of bedroom with blanket wrapped around her delicate body, and took her to kitchen. He set her down, but she refured to let go of him, so he picked her into his arms, sit down to the chair and held her against himself.

Aline looked troubled, "There was someone at the gate. He said his name was Bane. He said you'd know him."

"We do know him, let him in." Jace said, "He's friend of ours."

"Black haired gay guy wearing make up and glitter?" Aline asked.

"Sounds like right guy:" Jace comfirmed.

Aline nodded and went to open the door and let Magnus in from gates.

"What you think he wants from us?" Clary asked in small voice, still holding on to Jace like little child.

"I don't know.. But Magnus seems like honest guy. Weird, but honest."

Magnus run to kitchen, Aline right behind him.

"Hiya golden boy, sweetheart.. "Magnus nodded to Jace and then to Clary, "I hate to ruin your cozy morning. but you both are wanted. Police are looking for you. Your families informed you both as missing persons."

Jace narrowed his eyes, "Nobody could have inform me, I told them I was leaving."

"Luke.. Luke might be worried about me." Clary said.

"But why I'd be wanted then?" Jace asked thoughtfully.

Magnus held his inxed finger up, "Unless- that guy who escaped from prison to find you, is trying to get cops do dirty work of finding you."

Jace frowned and Clary whimpered.  
"Magnus.." Jace said, "We're going to need water proof escape plan."

Magnus smiled mysteriously, "No worries golden boy, Magnus will help ya."

Jace rolled his eyes for the nickname, "Too damn good to know that.."

Clary looked at Magnus, then to Jace and tighten her hold of him.

Magnus laughed, "Easy sweetheart, I'm not taking your man."

"Not meaning to be rude Magnus- but you would 't stand a chance to her even if you tried." Jace said, pressing loving kiss on Clary's forhead.

Even everything seemed to break down again, Clary managed to smile slightly at their conversation.

Magnus held his hands up in surrender with clearly pretended hurt, "Okay, I admit- Sweetheart here defeated me."

Clary made small giggling sound, nuzzling her face to Jace's neck, feeling his pulse strong and steady on his throat.

"But, what can we do now? I mean- Jace and Clary are wanted." Aline said.

"I'll call Alec, he'll go tell those guys he knows where we are and that it's false alarm that we're missing."

"How does it explain that he knows it but no one else?"

"Lightwoods knows. We told them."

"And Jocelyn." Clary said quietly.

"Jocelyn is-?" Magnus asked in puzzlement.

"Her biological mother." Jace sighed heavily. "She could have report us missing to help Sebastian find us.."

"Well but this Alec guy can tell them your family knows you're here. Problem solved."

"We're not even close.." Clary said.

"You and Jocelyn?" Magnus asked, getting a nod from both of them. "Perfect! Now pack your belongings love birds- I'm gonna take you for ride of your life."

Jace looked puzzled, Clary just blinked few times and looked from Jace to Magnus and back.

Magnus clapped his hands, "Shooo! Love birds, the train is about to leave."

"Train?" Jace asked.

"My car." Magnus shrugged.

Jace shook his head but said nothing, taking Clary back to upstairs so they could get dressed.

"Where you think he's taking us?" Clary asked.

"No idea... " Jace said, failing to hide hint of amusement from his voice.

They got dressed and collected their things fast, coming back downstairs where Magnus was chatting with Aline.

"Ah, perfect, we better leave right away. You should also call your brother now Jace to get police off your tracks."

He said and left to the door, Clary and Jace following him.

"Jace." Aline called, taking hold of his arm.

"What?" Jace asked, frowning, and looked down to his arm where Aline held it and then to her face.

"I'm scared." Aline whined.

Jace raised his eyebrows, "And what you think I'm going to do about it?"

"Take me with you Jace.. Please."

Jace pulled his arm free, "I can't really help you Aline. You're not the one in danger."

"But Magnus said that Sebastian will probably come look for you from here first! He will kill me to get any information out of me- doesn't he?"

Jace sighed, "I don't know what he will or will not do. He won't get pass the gates even if he came here. You call police then and he's trapped." He turned to leave but Aline took hold of his arm again.

"Jace wait!"

Magnus and Clary stopped to the doorway and looked back.

"What's that chick's problem?" Magnus wondered half aloud.

Clary shrugged, frowning as she watched Aline taking hold of Jace's arm and trying to keep him from leaving.  
Magnus tapped her shoulder, "Does they have history together by any chance?"

Clary looked up to him, "How could I know?"

Magnus opened his mouth to say something but shut it, turning Clary to walk out before him.

"Hey! What you-"

"They have now." Magnus said grimly and kept pushing Clary forward.

Clary got pale, "W-what you mean?"

Magnus shook his head, and opened the door to passanger seat. "You sweetheart, keep me company. Your golden boy will be fine on his own at backseat."

"Magnus, what-?"

"She kissed him. And apparently it's nothing new to him."

Clary sucked in her breath, looking down to her hands.

"I'm sorry sweetheart." Magnus said.

"I- I'd like not to talk about it now." Clary said quietly, she doubted Magnus even heard her, but he just nodded and closed the door, staying out to wait for Jace.

Clary felt numb. She knew of Jace's past, and she thought it doesn't bother her what he did before they met. But right now- they were very much together. But then again, Magnus said that Aline kissed him, not other way around... Oh right, but Jace just happened to be too noble to push her away.

She glanced out from window when Jace run to catch up with them, Magnus stopping him before he could get any closer and try to get to her.

She didn't hear what they were saying, but Jace looked alarmed, and ashamed.

It was difficult to be angry at him when he looked like lost puppy she wished she could run to him and hold him tight. But he had hurt her. He should have push Aline away and tell her he wasn't available.

Magnus had crossed his arms to his chest and looked at Jace with- loathing? What the hell had happened there?

Clary felt sick and she opened the car door, Magnus holding Jace back from coming to her, and she threw up everything she had in her stomach to the grass, closing her eyes so she won't have to see Jace and took deep breath of fresh air before closing the door again.

Magnus dragged Jace to backseat and Clary heard him warning Jace from not saying a word or trying to lay a finger on her, or Magnus will throw him out of the car.

Then he hopped in to driver's seat and smiled to Clary, "Sweetheart, you're the DJ of this ride." He handed Clary collection of CD's where she could choose what they would listen.

Clary didn't even bother to look on backseat to Jace. She didn't want to think about anything that possibly was between Jace and Aline.

** Really sorry for such a long break, I have been busy and then I was sick, but now we're back on action and things will get tricky. **

** Thanks for all reviews! **

** I hope you enjoy new chapter. **

**Till next time then, **

** Delicately Dark**

** XXX**


	18. Spark of Heartbreak

Magnus stopped the car in front of small, cozy looking house, which seemed to be decorated with really good sense of style.

"Sweetheart, would you come help me with one little thing?"

Clary blinked, waking from her thoughts.

"Why you-?" Jace asked from backseat but Magnus shot him a cold, warning look and Jace shut up with obviously annoyed sigh.

Magnus looked back to Clary, and she nodded.

What she had to lose if she went to help Magnus with something. It might even make her feel better to be able to do something useful, and to be honest, she had grown quite fond of Magnus. Not that she was attracted to Magnus, but this guy was funny, and closest thing to friend Clary had ever had.

She got out of the car and followed Magnus inside the house.

"You live here?" She asked, admiring gorgeous designs.

Magnus shrugged, "My mother lived here, when she died I got the house. I don't have a heart to sell it."

"But you don't live here?"

"I use it like summer home. I come here for holidays and such. I have own apartment in London that I very much enjoy to have."

Clary nodded her understanding. "What you want my help for?"

"Right, " Magnus nodded, leading her to cozy looking bedroom with fireplace in it. There was few bags waiting for them.

Magnus tested which one would be lighter to carry and handed it to Clary.

"Take that next to the car would you please Sweetheart?"

Clary took the bag and carried it to the car, settling it carefully down without knowing if there's something that might break, she didn't even look at the car even she could feel Jace's eyes on her.

Then she went back inside to find Magnus.

"Oh goodie, you're back. Here." He handed her a box, which appently included jewelry inside it.

"Try not to drop it Sweetheart. My momma would skin me alive if her precious jewels were dropped."

Humor in his voice made Clary laugh and she turned to go, then Magnus called her back and she turned back to him.

Magnus took the box, sitting down to the bed and patted the stop next to him, opening the box.

"What?" Clary asked.

Magnus searched through the box and took out gold necklace with small golden angel hanging from it.

Clary smiled, "It's very pretty Magnus."

"Do you want it?"

"Wh-what?! Me?.. N-no, I couldn't."

Magnus rolled his eyes and put the box away, opening the chain and slipping it around her neck, gold angel settling itself gracefully to her chest.

Clary blushed, "Thank you.. I-it's beautiful."

Magnus smiled, tilting his head to the side.

"My momma had daughter before me. She died before I was born. This was meant to be her 15th birthday present. Local blacksmith back then made it himself. Momma told me to keep it until I'd find someone who would appreciate it's meaning. I think you do. My promise to my momma is kept." Magnus shut the box and handed it to Clary.

"Shoo Sweetheart, we have bit of a hurry."

"Thank you."Clary nodded, then she giggled and took the box, Magnus following her out and locking the door.

"Help me get these all in." Magnus said, piling the bags at the back of the car.

"Magnus?"

"Yup?"

"Are you moving away?"

"Nope, these bags has my momma's old stuff. I take them to London and put them in my cellar there which is much bigger than one in here."

Clary nodded and helped him pack everything in.

They got in and Jace instantly tried to shot them with questions but Magnus turned radio on and looked at Jace from the mirror.

"No can do golden boy, we don't hear you."

Clary couldn't help but giggle, her fingers wandering to gold angel she had just got. She had never had any jewelry, they never had money to waste for something like that. And something about the story behind this angel was touching to her. It had been self made, people had worked for it, and the girl who was meant to have it- was gone. She could see how Magnus didn't want it all to go for waste, but she didn't know how she deserved it. She hadn't done anything to Magnus that she'd deserve any presents from him. But he had seemed so pleased to see it on her, probably it was something he had wanted to do since his mother passed. To see that angel on someone who did appreciate it. So she promised to him in her thoughts to always treasure it.

"What's that?" Jace asked and his hand was reached out to touch Clary's shoulder.

Magnus snapped Jace's hand away, "Leave my Sweetheart alone. I said you will not mess with her head before we get to my place."

"I'm not messing with her head!"

Magnus stopped the car and turned to look at Jace, "Shut your wicked mouth or you will have to test those muscles of yours by running behind the car rest of the way there."

Clary felt so small she wished she could disappear. They were arguing because of her. Her small fingers wrapped around the angel and she sink lower in her seat.

Even the edges of the angel was pressing into her skin, it felt comfortable to have something to hold on to.

"Can we- just keep going now?" She asked in small voice.

Magnus patted her shoulder and kept driving. "Select the CD Sweetheart, you're the DJ, and no mourning love songs."

Clary looked at him and he grinned, "It wouldn't do for me to be asleep here. Or crying. We're hit the tree then."

Clary smiled a bit, going through his CD collection and put in a player one with disco hits from 90's.

Magnus's face light up and he turned volume up a bit, "Perfect choice Sweetheart!"

Jace huffed and leaned back to his seat, he turned to look out of window but his eyes wondered to Clary every now and then.

She did feel his stare, but she didn't feel like giving him that release yet to show him she wasn't really angry anymore. Hurt, yes, and she wished from all her heart that he'd have very good explanation to everything, but she wasn't angry.

Magnus stopped the car in front of small cafeteria. "Anyone else hungry?"

Clary realized just now that she hadn't eat anything all day, and she nodded. Fishing her precious few coins from her bag. She would have to get something with them.

Magnus slapped her hand, not hard, she barely even felt it, and his playful expression made her realize what he meant.

"It's on me Sweetheart." He said and Clary sighed, putting away her money and followed Magnus out.

"You coming golden boy?"

Jace raised eyebrow and came out then, stretching himself after sitting in car for almost whole day.

Magnus turned Clary to walk in before him and indicated Jace to follow.

"Can I just be out for a minute? I need some fresh air. I come find you later." Jace said.

Magnus shrugged, "Suit yourself"

Clary peeked at Jace over her shoulder but Magnus kept pushed her forward.

Once the door closed and she couldn't see him anymore, she turned to look around.

"What would you like?" Magnus asked.

"No sandwiches." Clary said.

"Yup no. They taste like pieces of paper with crap between them. Do you like pies?"

Clary blinked, "I've not had pies much before... But the one I had, it was good."

"Goodie, go find us table Sweetheart, I bring our pies. What you drink?"

"Uhm.. Ice tea?"

"Great choice."

She shook her head and go find the table, suddenly reminding herself she needs to find table for three.

She wondered why Magnus was so protective? She did appreciate it, but she wondered why.

Magnus sat down and handed her a pie and bottle of ice tea.

"I can't eat so big pie." She giggled.

Magnus shrugged, "We haven't eat all day, that should sink in your stomach like Titanic."

Clary looked around, "Where's Jace?"

"He'll come. No doubt he's bit asleep from sitting in there all day."

"Magnus... Why you're so- protective?"

Magnus bite his pie and looked thoughtful. "No one was for me. And by the looks of it- you've got crap enough already."

Clary frowned, "I'm sorry."

"About what?"

"That no one was for you.. And that I cause so much trouble to you."

Magnus laughed. "You don't cause me trouble Sweetheart. You're my friend."

Clary smiled at that and bite down to her pie, "Thanks Magnus, for everything."

Magnus waved his hand, "No biggie."

Then they saw Jace come in and he go get himself a coffee.

"That's all you're gonna have?" Magnus asked when Jace sat down.

"I'm not hungry."

"Says a guy who freaks out when I don't eat." Clary muttered.

Jace looked at her, his eyes burning. "Clary, we need to t-"

"Shush! Let my Sweetheart eat without losing her appetite."

"She's not your sweetheart, she's mine. And what right you have to keep me away all day?"

Magnus narrowed his eyes coldly. "Leave. Her. Alone."

Shiver run down Clary's back.

"H-hey.. Lets not fight.." She said in small voice.

Jace got up and looked at her, "Clary come on, we need to talk. Now."

Magnus shook his head.

She didn't know what to do. She wanted to talk things through with Jace, but Magnus's reaction made her wonder was she ready to hear him out. If he would reveal something she simply can't handle.

"I uhm... " She took deep breath, gathering her courage and looked at Magnus, "I'll be right back."

Magnus raised a brow, "No sneaking too far."

Clary swallowed and followed Jace out. She saw Magnus watching them through the window like a hawk.

She crossed her arms to her chest, "You wanted to talk- so talk."

"Clary you don't understand.."

"Then help me understand Jace! Why there's a girl living your house who's all over you when I turn my back for five minutes?!"

"She had misscarriage once."

Clary closed her eyes, "Don't even say it..."

"Clary I didn't know about it!"

"Oh yeah? You don't know what happens when you screw around with girls like that? Are you just so naive, that you don't give a damn, or are you literally just a heartless bastard?! Is that what I have to look forward to?"

Jace looked shocked. Just utterly shocked.

"Clary... No. I'd never leave you."

Clary run her fingers through her hair and sighed, "What happened back there?"

"She tried to keep me from leaving by telling me this."

"Why? Is she still in love with you?"

"We were never in love. It was a party and-"

"Enough!"

Jace sighed. "Clary I'm sorry." He said heavily, without knowing what else to say.

"For what?"

"Of all this.. I never meant to hurt you.."

"Well you did. Why you didn't just push her away? She knew you had me."

"Had?"

"Answer me Jace."

"I was surprised, okay? I didn't have much time to react and once I did get her off of me, she decided to share her news... Clary, there's no way of knowing if she lied to me.. Or if it was someone elses."

"Good to know you found someone equal to yourself."

Jace looked at her eyes wide, "Clary... Don't do this.." His voice was pleading, begging even.

She shook her head, "I need some time to think... I knew you had your past, but after all- they always say that history repeats itself. I want to believe you can change Jace... I want to believe that all those things you said to me weren't just sweet lies, but right now I can't. I just can't.. Leave me alone for while."

Jace took hold of her hand, his eyes beggin, "Clary.. "

"Let go Jace.."

He shook his head, "I can't.. I love you Clary. I know I hurt you, and I'll spent rest of my life making it up to you.. Just don't- don't leave me."

Clary swallowed, tears filling her eyes even she tried to blink them back, "If you love me, you let me go now."

"Clary I can't.. I can't live without you. I know I don't deserve you, but I need you.. You make better person."

"Then don't force me to stay when I can't. You'll only make it harder for me to come back."

"Will you- come back to me?"

Clary swallowed again, tears streaming down her cheeks and Jace reached to wipe them away but she didn't let him.

"Let go of me Jace.. You got me fall in love with you just to show me how stupid it was. But I love you anyway.. Let me go. I need some time to myself."

"Don't leave me.. Clary please."

"I don't.. Not now. I just want some time, okay? Let me go."

Jace nodded weakly, he blinked few times and Clary thought his eyes looked sparkling, like they were filled with tears, but she turned away and walked back inside before she could verify her suspicion is Jace even capable of crying.

**Thanks for all reviews again, I'm so happy you like the story. **

**And now you guys have chance to be part of it a little. Here is how it goes: **

**Sent a review that is like a text message from some of the following people: **

**-Alec**

**-Isabelle**

**-Luke**

**-Sebastian**

**-Maryse**

**-Jocelyn**

** For example make a review like this:**

** "Hey Jace, how are you? Mom is so worried it's getting annoying. Some info here please?! Love- Iz" **

** One of you will get to be part of the story and effect of how it's gonna go. I will copy that message and include it to story. Only one thing you must remember: Nobody of those people knows about Magnus, they don't know exactly where Jace and Clary are. **

**And Jace is the one who gets this message. Clary- if you remember, broke her prone when she dropped it by shocking of Jocelyn's call. **

** I give you guys 'till May 21 to review this and I will post next chapter then. **

** Delicately Dark**

** XXX**


	19. Spark of His Sealed Fate

Rest of the way to Magnus's apartment was quiet, only faint sounds of music coming from radio. Most likely to keep Magnus fully awake.

It was late already, and Clary wanted nothing more but to curl up in ball and cry herself to sleep, but she would not do that when Jace was watching her like a hawk from backseat.

Jace and Magnus had cold silence between them. Magnus was- by all means, still up to help for them both, he wasn't blinded by his anger like some might be in his place, but he showed his anger with cold looks and even colder tone if he had to say anything to Jace.

Jace, on the other hand, was somewhere between misery and anger. His expression gave nothing away, but even Clary was hurt, she knew- so was he.

She was beginning to regret her harsh words to him. After all, it had been Aline kissing Jace, not other way around. And when she thought about it, she would have been surprised as well if someone all of sudden kissed her.

And their past... As much as Clary wanted to push his past from her mind, she couldn't. But how she could hold it against him when he had done nothing to prove he would treat her like all others from his past.

_And I love him... _ Thought was clear, but it hurt.

She knew she couldn't stop loving him. She had fallen for him so hard, so fast, she couldn't even imagine to live without him.

She should think it from his side as well. Jace had never lied to her. Even if she had not liked the truth, he had told it.

There was no point of calling him betrayer when he hadn't done anything.

Peeking at her side the faint reflections from window glass, she catch his eye from reflection and she dropped her hand to her side, reaching out her fingers to try and make him realize her point.

And then his hand reached out and he took hold of her hand, squeezing it gently.

It was familiar, warm and safe feeling she loved. She closed her eyes, one little tear escaped from corner of her eye, and she drifted off to sleep.

_"Jace!" She called, over and over and over again, but he was laying on pool of blood without any sign of life. Tears were streaming down her cheeks like waterfall, and she kept screaming for his name, begging him to open his eyes, to move even a finger. _

_Well fact was, if he moved a finger, she probably didn't see it through her tears, but his chest was still. He wasn't even breathing, so it wasn't likely for him to move his fingers either. But she kept hoping. It was all she had. She couldn't just give up on him. _

_"J-j-jace... P-please.." _

_"Will you ever stop whining?" Smooth, cold- way too familiar voice asked behind her. _

_She bit down her lip, squeezing her eyes shut. _

_Sebastian walked over to Jace and kneel down, gripping of Jaces wrist and stopped for a moment. _

_"No pulse." He smirked up at her. "He's dead." _

_Something snapped in Clary's head, she just stared at him, eyes wide of shock. _

_Sure she had known it, but hearing it said aloud hit her so hard it left her breathless. _

_Sebastian came over and released her hands from ties and she run to Jace, kneeling down next to him and pulling his head to rest on her lap, holding him like he was a child. _

_His face was covered with bruises. His nose must be broken, and his lower lip was bleeding. Yet he looked so peaceful. His face was relaxed and his expression showed no signs of suffering before he had died. _

_Out of nowhere, Sebastian hit a dagger to Jaces chest, twisting it several times and he carved Jaces heart out. _

_Clary screamed in panic and pure heartbreak..._

"Magnus, stop the car!"

Magnus stopped and Jace got out of the car, opening the passanger side door and pulled Clary out of the car.

She was screaming and crying hysterically. Tears were running down her cheeks and she was shaking.

She was in panic.

"What's with her?" Magnus asked as he came out of car as well and held small light above Jace while he kneel down to the ground, holding Clary in his arms.

"She's in panic. She's under a lot of pressure, she's overstressed and it goes right into her dreams." Jace answered, trying to calm her down.

"Figured. What kind of bomb you dropped on her?"

Jace got enough, he shot murderous look on Magnus, "I didn't drop anything on her. I told her the truth. And that truth is that I can't change my past even I wish I could! And I love her, so how about you shut your well lipglossed mouth before I actually make you shut it and let me try help her!"

Magnus was visibly hurt, but he stood there quiet and held the light for Jace.

"Clary.. Clary, wake up. It's just a dream." Jace held her tight, stroking her hair, trailing feather light kisses along her cheeks. "Wake up Clary.. Wake up."

She sobbed, gasped, and her eyes got wide open.

"Jace!"

Before he could say anything, she had wrapped her arms around him so tight, he couldn't move.

"Clary.. What is it?"

She pressed her ear to his chest, his heart was beating so strong, but it's steady beat had speed up slightly. She had probably scared him.

"Clary?" Jace's voice was soft, merely a whisper, "What was it about?"

She was still sobbing silently. "A-are we there y-yet?"

Jace looked up to Magnus, who seemed to have forgot his anger for now. His worry for Clary more important.

"How far are we?" Jace asked.

Magnus looked around, "Half an hour away."

Jace nodded, then he pressed his lips to her forehead and whispered between kisses, "Just half an hour away. We'll be there soon."

She hang on to Jace and turned to peek at Magnus, "C-can I be on b-backseat with Jace r-rest of the way?"

Magnus nodded, "Sure Sweetheart. If that makes you feel better."

She gave him small smile and hang on to Jace while he lifted her up and carried her with him to the backseat.

Magnus hopped in at the driver's seat and kept driving.

Clary fell back to sleep in Jace's arms, listening his steady heartbeats.

He never loosened his hold of her, but kept whispering loving words to her ear even she had drifted back to sleep.

Finally Magnus stopped. "We're here." He whispered and Jace nodded, carrying Clary carefully out of the car.

"I take your bags." Magnus said when Jace looked troubled.

"Thanks." Jace nodded.

Magnus picked up their bags, locked the car doors and lead Jace in huge building, up with elevator to sixth floor and inside to very stylish apartment.

Magnus closed the door and pointed left door on hallway, "Guest room is there. I doubt she's letting go of you so I'm not making another bed in my couch."

Jace looked slightly amused, "Well I promise we will behave ourselves."

Magnus shot him a grim look and Jace sighed. "Magnus I'm sorry I snapped at you... I just- I'm scared. I can't lose her."

Magnus seemed to accept this and pushed Jace forward, "Well shoo, I'm not forgiving you that if you make me sleep standing here."

Jace chuckled, "Fair enough.. And Magnus, thanks. For everything."

Now Magnus got his usual spark in his eye and winked, "Anytime lovebirds."

Jace shook his head and entered the guest room, settling Clary down to the bed and she stirred.

"Are we there yet?"

"Yes we are. Let me get your shoes off, it's better to sleep without them."

She nodded, her eyes closing tiredly.

When he had got her shoes off, he wrapped blanket around her.

She gripped his hand, "Don't leave me."

"I'm not. I go get some water and I'll be back."

Clary nodded tiredly and let go of him. When he came back and set water glass to bedside table, she rolled to her side and looked up at him, waiting for him to lay down next to her. But he sat down to the edge, taking hold of her hand and reach out his other hand to stroke her hair tenderly.

"What was it about? Earlier.. What scared you so badly?" He asked with soft whisper.

Tears filled Clary's eyes. The vivid memory of Sebastian's dagger flashing out of nowhere and piercing through Jace's chest, the smell of blood and that crushing sound when he had twisted the dagger in Jace's chest to rip heart out.

She was shaking and sobbing again, and then Jace was there, laying beside her and holding her tight.

"Shhh... It was just a dream. I'm just trying to understand what's wrong."

"H-h-he killed you.."

Jace frowned. "Who killed me?"

"S-sebasti-an.."

Jace took a deep breath and inhaled softly, "He's not going to kill me."

Clary looked up to his eyes, "He s-said he was c-coming for you."

Jace moved lock of her hair behind her ear, "Sebastian knows that I can easily beat him in fair fight. He won't attack on us anywhere public, because he's already wanted. He will make it private. And I have already almost killed him once. I can do that again."

"B-but.. I don't want to l-lose you.."

"You won't.. Clary you won't lose me. I will never let you go. Last time, he was threatening Alec, and I almost killed him."

"Alec knows him?"

Jace nodded, "Some could say I had bad influence on him. He followed me most of the times. Sebastian and his mates were- they were insulting Alec of something personal, and he punched Sebastian. Sebastian made it a fight and tried to kill him. I couldn't let him do that.."

Clary blinked, she had stopped crying even she hadn't realized it. Jace had risked his life to save his brother from his adoptive family, and now he was perfectly calm telling her he would do it again.

Where he gets all that courage, when he's still so damaged? She couldn't understand it, but she admired him.

"Clary."

She blinked again, fixing her gaze to him. "Yes?"

"I love you."

She smiled, nuzzling her face to crook of his neck and breathed in his scent, his arms wrapping around her, so strong and protective.

"I love you too."

She could sense him smiling, and then he buried his face into her hair, falling asleep beside her.

Small sound from Jace's jeans pocket told them that he had received a message.

"Don't you dare let go of me yet." Clary muttered against his neck.

Jace chuckled, "It's probably Alec. It can wait."

Sun was shining through the curtains, drowning them in soft light.

Clary looked up to his face. He looked so peaceful and beautiful like this.

"You know that it's rude to stare- right?" He said in lighthearted, sleepy tone.

She smiled, "I'm not the one to blame of that you're so good looking."

He opened one eye, "Checking me out before breakfast? Oh no dearie, bad idea. I'm hungry."

She blushed at that and nuzzled her face back to his neck. "Stop it."

"What? I didn't do anything. I just said I'm hungry."

"I can imagine what you're hungry for."

He chuckled, "Breakfast?" He suggested, trying not to laugh.

"You're such a teaser Jace Wayland."

He laughed, "Why thank you."

Clary sit up, rubbing her eyes. "But you're right about that breakfast though. I'm hungry too."

Jace raised eyebrow, "When I'm not right?"

She slapped his arm lightly, "Shush!"

"Ouch! What did I do now?"

"That couldn't hurt!"

"Yeah, it did."

Clary rolled her eyes and climbed over him, stretching herself once she stood up.

"Come along my golden boy, we better go see what our host has to offer for breakfast to tame our hunger."

Jace sighed dramatically, "Oh great.. I doubt he has anything good enough to tame mine."

Clary giggled, shaking her head while she left the room.

Jace sit up, fishing his phone from his pocket.

There were two messages.

He frowned, one was from Alec as he had expected, the other was unknown number.

"_You think you can protect her but you're wrong. If I won't get to her, I'll get to your family, and we both know you don't want that_."

He swallowed. He didn't need to guess who it was.

Next message was from Alec.

_" Jace, we have a problem. You have to come back."_

Jace closed his eyes, he had to choose between his family and the love of his life... Oh sure, exactly the kind of situation he had always wanted to be.

"Damn it."

He knew already his decision, and it broke his heart.

Clary came to the doorway, "Hey, did you fall back to sleep? Magnus is making pancakes."

He smiled to her, she looked so beautiful standing there, her hair little messy, her eyes bright after well slept night.

"I'll be right there. Save me one."

Clary winked at him, "Even two." She said and left again.

He sighed heavily and broke his phone, opening the window and threw small card out of the window. It landed in grass and disappeared from his view.

Then he opened the bag Clary had with her, he knew she had notebook there. He ripped out one page and wrote a letter to it, hiding it in her bag.

God he wished he wouldn't have to do this... But he had to. He won't let anyone die because of him. Not Clary- and not his family.


	20. Spark of Loss

"You two can be so cutie." Magnus smirked, flipping a pancake on a pan.

Clary blushed and leaned her back against Jace's chest, while he was resting his chin on her shoulder, his arms loosely around her.

"You know Magnus- some cultures call it love?" Jace said.

Magnus rolled his eyes, "I know. And I'm happy to announce you that you will have my wonderful apartment all to yourself for few hours, I will have some things to take care of." He made meaningful look for them, "But no messing whole place."

Jace chuckled, trying not to laugh and Clary covered her face with her hands, knowing all too well what Magnus meant.

"Well you got my word, we will save your pretty apartment from most damage." Jace said.

Magnus shook his head, now he tried not to laugh. "There's bathtube you know..."

Jace looked at Clary and then back to Magnus, "Yeah, you're right, she looks like she needs bath."

Magnus sat opposite side of the table, "No doubt our Sweetheart here gets much dirtier in there than being cleaned up."

Clary made desperate noise, "Stop it!"

Magnus and Jace both laughed.

"Don't mind me Sweetheart." Magnus said and pointed at Jace with his fork, "I'd be all over that guy if I was you."

Jace chuckled, "Good to know... But maybe it would need my acceptance in that case."

Magnus winked at him, "You should give me your brother's number."

"How did you even know my brother's gay?"

"He is?" Clary and Magnus asked at the same time. Clary surprised, Magnus thrilled.

"Yeah.. What's so big deal about it?" Jace asked, his tone cool and defencive.

"Nothing." Clary said, "I just didn't know. It was surprising."

Magnus clapped his hands, "Oh goodie, this will be fun."

When they were done with breakfast, Magnus left to take care of his business.

Clary, who was excited of idea of getting a bubble bath, practically dragged Jace into bathroom as soon as the front door closed behind Magnus.

Finally Jace agreed to get a bath with her, following her to bathroom and closed the door behind them.

Clary got water running to fill the bathtub, looking at the lines of bottles at the edge of the tub.

"What we should put in here?"

Jace came behind her and reached to take one bottle and poured some creamy white liquid in water.

Clary smelled the sweet scent of roses.

"Hmm, lovely."

"You are."

Clary laughed, "No, I meant this scent. It's lovely."

Jace pulled her shirt over her head and pushed her hair away from her face, "And I meant you. You're the loveliest creature I've ever seen."

She blushed, and he leaned to kiss her cheeks.

Her small hands found hem of his shirt and she pulled it off of him, her eyes wondering down his perfect muscled body.

"Checking me out again?"

She blushed and looked quickly away, suddenly becoming very concerned how much water there was already in bathtube.

Jace placed a finger under her chin and made her look at him.

She blinked few times, her cheeks glowing red.

He leaned towards her to kiss her, his hands wandering down to her hips and before she even knew it, her jeans were off.

"That's unfair" She muttered breathlessly.

"What?" Jace asked, his voice faded into a husky whisper.

"You should.. Undress too."

"Well if you wanted me to take my clothes off, you should have just ask."

"I asked it. Now."

He chuckled and held his hands up. "You win."

Clary grinned, she felt much more confident than she usually did. It was like last time, she suddenly got courage to say and do things she wouldn't even dare to imagine with anyone else's company. Jace just- released her.

She trusted him.

She sat down to the edge of the tub and tilted her head to the side, "Well, what are you waiting for?"

Jace laughed. It was soft, slightly surprised sound and it made her smile.

"Go on, take them off."

Jace raised eyebrow teasingly, "What did you do to my Clary?"

Clary giggled, reaching to get her bra open and dropped it to the floor. " Are you going to stand there, or are you going to join me there?" She asked, pointing bathtub.

Jace rolled his eyes, taking off his jeans and socks.

Now Clary blushed and didn't dare to look at him.

"Aha, now I recognize you again." Jace said.

"Shhh!" Clary covered her face with her heands.

Jace chuckled softly and took hold of her hands, pulling her closer and tugged a lock of her hair behind her ear.

"I like you in every way... No one says it's bad thing to try new things, we'll go on your pace."

Clary smiled at him, "I love you Jace."

He hugged her tight, kissing her cheeks before kissing her lips. "I love you more."

Now that, made Clary blush even more.

"I think that's enough." Jace said and turned running water off. "It's full enough now."

Clary smiled and rested her head to his shoulder. "I have always wanted to take a bubble bath"

"You never have?"

"No.. "

Jace kissed her cheek, "Hey, why don't you get in already, I will come soon."

Clary blinked, "Where you're going?"

Jace smiled mysteriously, "Your bubble bath needs something to be perfect. Go on, get in. I'll be right back."

Clary wondered what that was about, but took off her underwear and get into the water, sighing happily of warmth and lovely scent all around her.

And then the lights went off.

"Jace! Jace!"

The door opened again, and Jace came in, carrying few candles. He set them around the bathroom and smiled at her.

"Tadaa"

Clary giggled, "It's lovely."

"Yeah, you are."

Clary blew few bubbles at him, "Come here with me."

Jace raised eyebrow, "To wash your back?"

Clary shook her head, "No, to keep me company."

"Fine, I'm coming."

He undressed himself and sat down in the bathtub opposite side to her.

She smiled and reached her hand out along the edge of the tub, and he took her hand.

"This is better than I ever thought."

"There's bathtube's in back home. You can have a bath every day if you want."

Clary leaned back to the tub, relaxing herself, "I don't think I want it every day. It'd lose it's specialty.. But I sure would want it more often.. Maybe once or- twice a week.."

Jace smiled at her, squeezing her hand gently. "Mind if I join you every now and then?"

She looked at him and shook her head, "I'd never mind that."

Jace leaned little closer to her and kissed her hand, up to her arm and shoulder, making her shiver.

He kissed up her neck and chin, finally her lips, so lightly she had to lean closer to him.

Then he pulled back, leaning back to the bathtub on his own side.

Clary blinked, "Such a tease..."

Jace smiled like an angel. He managed to be cute and adorable, while his eyes sparkled wickedly, saying he would definitely do anything and everything with her.

Vivid memory of their night in Wayland manor flashed in Clary's mind, and before she could think it any further, she moved over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, resting her head to his chest.

His heart was beating faster, but still so strong and alive.

"Are you okay?" He asked in low whisper, brushing his fingers through her hair.

She nodded slightly. "I'm great.."

Jace kissed the top of her head, resting his chin to her head lightly, stroking her hair soothingly.

She chuckled softly, "If you keep doing that, I will fall asleep."

She didn't see it, but she could tell he was smiling. "Would it be so bad?"

"I want to be with you."

"You are with me silly... Little nap won't hurt you. You have had rough few days.. I'll make sure you're fine."

Something in his voice made her look up at him.

"What's wrong?"

He shook his head, "Nothing. I might be little tired too."

Clary frowned, "You're hiding something."

Something flashed in his golden eyes, something she couldn't quite name what.

"Jace?"

He shook his head again and pulled her in tight hug, "I'm fine Clary.. I'm just- afraid. Just like you were. I keep having these thoughts that, What if- I can't keep you safe? It's just worrying me. That's all. But we have Magnus to help us, and I think we can trust him... We'll be fine."

She smiled, relieved that he opened up to her to share his worries, kissing his smooth skin and rested her head back to his chest, "We will be alright."

He squeezed her gently, "We will... I love you."

And he did manage to successfully get Clary fall back to sleep.

It was whole different thing to lift her up from bathtub and carry her to the bed without waking her.

She curled to cuddle with blanket and Jace took another blanket to cover her.

Then he dressed up and took deep breath, taking one last look to his sleeping beauty until he quietly left the house.

He trusted that Magnus would keep Clary safe. He had no other choice. He had left Magnus a note, hoping Clary wouldn't be the one to find it.

He took taxi to nearest airport, knowing that he had no turning back anymore. Knowing he might never see her again. It broke his heart and he bit his lip, not even noticing bitter taste of blood in his mouth.

He took his comfort from that he knew Clary would have everything she needed. She would own everything he owned, she would never have to starve again, she would have safe home... Eventually she would fall in love with someone else, and she'd have her own family there..

Jace closed his eyes against his misery. He knew he was doing the right thing- it didn't mean he liked the consequences it had. He had his own wishes to live with Clary, make her happy, marry her.. He gave it all up to give her a chance to have it all with someone else.

Meanwhile Clary had awaken from her blissful sleep.

She sit up, stretching her arms above her head.

"Jace?" She looked around the room and wrapped the blanket around her body, wandering around apartment.

"Jace, this is not funny.."

Front door opened, and Magnus came in.

"Well, well, I thought I'd walk right into you guys making out around my house.."

But one look to Clary's face told him, he had been wrong.

"What happened?"

Clary sniffed, her eyes watering. "We had a bath.. I fell asleep for while... Magnus he's not here anymore."

Magnus got pale.

"You sure?"

Clary looked at Magnus with "Are you serious?"-look and he rolled his eyes.

"Magnus he's gone. And I have no idea where he went." She sobbed.

Magnus patted her shoulder, "Now Sweetheart, you go get yourself clothes on, and I make you some of my magical tea, and then we make a plan what to do."

She nodded, not bothering to wonder what Magnus's magical tea was but she knew she couldn't just run around looking for Jace. She would need to stop think and make some kind of plan. And she had best chances to find Jace if she worked with Magnus, but she couldn't help tears that were running down her cheeks.

Jace had meant for her to fall asleep, so she wouldn't stop him... It would only mean he was going to do something dangerous. Her heart ached at the thought she might never see him again, and she had bet her whole life to him. She had runaway with him, to create new life. For them. Not for herself, but for them.

Folded piece of paper dropped from her bag when she took out clean t-shirt and underwear.

She picked it up and fold it open, her heart jumping for seeing familiar handwriting.

_Clary, I'm sorry I had to leave without you. Believe me, I am sorry. I miss you. I have left the keys to Wayland manor for you, and if I'm not coming back anymore- it will be yours. I have left some papers to Magnus, he will help you. The manor will be yours along with everything else. _

_That's all just in case I can't come back to you. I hope I can. I love you Clary. Please don't put yourself in danger. _

_Jace._

Clary fell to her knees, bursting into heartbreaking cry that got Magnus run to her and kneel down beside her.

"Sweetheart, what happened?"

Clary handed the letter to him with shaking hands, sobbing hysterically into his shoulder.

Magnus read through the letter and cursed under his breath, "Damn you golden boy..."

He pat Clary's back and sighed, "Come Sweetheart, you definitely need some tea."

"I-I don't w-want tea.. I want Jace..."

"Well Sweetheart, at the moment so do I but I doubt he's receiving that message now. Come, we need a plan. And I need to find what he left for me. Maybe he left me birthday present along with his grim goodbye letters." He shrugged and left to kitchen, leaving Clary stare after him speechlessly, silent tears still running down her cheeks.


	21. Spark of Family Bounds

Jace walked out of airport, taking deep breath. He found another taxi to take him to Lightwoods.

He didn't know if Sebastian was there or not, or if he was just threatening them to lure Jace there to protect them, but going there was best place to start. At least he'd see it for sure his family was alright.

"Jace?!"

Jace turned around to see Isabelle run to him, wrapping her arms around his neck and squeezing him tight.

"Izzy.. What you're doing here?" He asked, holding her tight.

He couldn't remember if he had ever actually hugged Izzy, but he was so glad to have her there with him now, seeing her being fine and well.

Izzy pulled back but kept her hands to his shoulders, "Mom and dad are sending us to England. Alec tried to reach you, but couldn't get message through. We were coming for you."

Jace shook his head, "I threw my phone away. Couldn't risk it fr Sebastian to be able to track us. Clary will be at the Wayland manor. I gave it to her. But no doubt she'll let you get in there. Where's Alec?"

Izzy's mouth fell open, "You what?! Jace.. It's your family home..."

"And Clary is my family now Iz!"

Isabelle sighed and looked around, letting her hands to fall from Jace's shoulders.

"Alec went to get our bags through check... I'm sure he'll be here soon."

Jace frowned, watching his sister carefully.

Isabelle had always been totally perfect. She took care of herself and her looks better than anyone Jace had ever known. Now- she seemed tired, her hair up in messy ponytail and her make up was half done. She had lost weight.

He had never thought of it much, he and Isabelle were never so close, more likely always teasing each other, but somewhere along the way they had find certain kind of connection. Jace feeling some kind of need to keep her safe and make sure she was fine, while Izzy kicked anyone's ass if they insulted him.

He realized just now how much Isabelle must care about him, and despite their situation, he pulled her back in tight hug.

"Jace-?" She made surprised sound and hugged him back then, nuzzling her face to his shoulder.

"You idiot... Do you have any idea what you put us through?"

"I'm sorry... Hey Iz?"

"Hm?"

Jace swallowed, squeezing her lightly, "I love you."

He could hear her sob and holding him tighter, "I love you too, bastard."

He chuckled and couldn't help but smile a bit. "There it is. My bitchy sister."

Isabelle giggled and pulled back.

"Jace?!"

"Oh no, not again?" Jace sighed while Alec threw himself at him, almost knocking Jace over.

"Jeez Alec, don't kill him there. He might need to breathe in order to stay alive." Izzy said, rolling her eyes.

Alec let go of Jace and slapped him.

Both Jace and Isabelle looked at Alec in surprise.

"Alec?"

"That was for making us sick of worry over you!" Alec answered.

Jace sighed and rubbed his aching cheek, "Yeah, I missed you too brother."

Alec crossed his arms to his chest, "Do you have any-"

"Yeah, I have. Iz just asked that same question and made it clear, thank you very much."

Alec looked at Izzy and smiled, "My girl."

Isabelle held her hands up, "Oh no, out of two of you, I'm on Jace's side. He's more fun."

Alec looked at her eyes wide, "Isabelle?!"

Jace chuckled, "Good girl."

"Jace?!"

"Not again.." Jace and Isabelle said at the same time when Maryse run to him.

"It's Jace!"

And so did Max run to hug his hero-brother.

Jace sighed, patting Maryse's back, "Mom, I'm fine if you just stop chocking me."

Maryse pulled back, giving Jace a serious look. He knew that if Max wouldn't be there, Maryse would yell at him until he's deaf.

Max tugged at him sleeve and he looked down, the boy was paler than he remembered.

Jace kneel down and hugged his little brother.

Max squeezed him with his small arms, sniffling to his chest, "You're not leaving again Jace, right? You come with us now."

Jace closed his eyes. He had always known Lightwoods had taken him part of their family with so unconditional love he didn't deserve it, but Max had always been so fond of him. Always looking up to him.

Isabelle saved him from answering, "Come Max, mom and I are going to buy some magazines to read while we are on airplaine, you should come choose some too. It's long way to England."

"Okay." Max nodded, letting go of Jace and waved at him, "See you soon!"

Jace sighed, just giving a faint nod.

"Jace?" Alec asked, resting his hand on Jace's shoulder.

Jace sighed, his heart was breaking and he turned to his brother, hugging him tight.

"I want you to go.. All of you. Clary owns the Wayland manor, you'll all be safe there... I can't do this if I know any of you are in danger."

Alec squeezed him, shaking his head fiercely. "No Jace. You don't get to just leave me behind again. You're my brother! You're my best friend! You're only one who never questioned me being just the same guy I always was just because-"

Jace pulled back, keeping his hands on Alec's shoulders, "I know. Alec... I just can't take the risk of losing you."

"And I'm supposed to take a certain risk to lose you? And what about Clary? That girl is head over heels in love with you jackass, you can't just leave her like that, it's not one of your one night stands Jace!"

"I know that!"

Alec rolled his eyes and slapped Jace again, "I'm not going to stay behind. I'm coming with you."

"Ouch!" Jace rolled his eyes now. "Idiot."

"Jackass."

"Bastard."

Alec smiled, "I love you too."

Jace laughed, patting Alec's shoulder. "You're learning."

"I learn from the best." Alec nodded.  
"No denying in that." Jace said.

Alec just shook his head in amusement.

Jace got serious. "We should go."

Alec nodded, looking around to make sure their family didn't see them and then he followed Jace out.

Meanwhile Clary and Magnus took their roadtrip back to Wayland manor.

Magnus had made it clear, he's not letting Clary out of his sight before Jace would come back.

List of reasons was endless. He wasn't risking it to give her a chance to harm herself- which they both knew she would do if she just could. He won't let her starve herself, knowing Jace he would kick his ass if Clary was fading away into skeleton when he comes back.

Well- Magnus was pretty sure he'd be dead man when Jace comes back and anything had happened to her.

So he simply had made his mind to keep Clary safe and as well as he was able to keep her.

Aline was panicing and pacing around when Clary and Magnus came.

Suddenly Clary's sickening worrying turned into sharp anger when she remembered scene between Aline and Jace.

"Where's Jace?" Aline asked.

Clary narrowed her eyes, "Well I'm sorry, he's not available for screwing you at the moment. And this is my house now, so if I feel like it, I can throw you out. He has no say in it. So shut up. He's taken. And I'm not sharing him."

Magnus raised his eyebrow and watched after Clary when she stormed up the stairs to her room.

"Now that- is one angry girlfriend you got to deal with."

Aline looked shocked. "H-he told her?"

Magnus smiled, "You know, you're pretty dumb to think he won't, considering he's in love with that girl up there. Your past doesn't mean a thing to him, while Clary- is his whole life... And he's hers. So. Back off dumbie."

Aline stared at Magnus, but lost the staring competition and left to her room.

Magnus on the other hand, took his suitcase and made his way upstairs.

"Hey Sweetheart, where am I staying?"

Clary took a peek from her room and pointed the door she had seen Jace going- his parents bedroom.

"Any other room but that one."

Magnus nodded and went to the room next to hers.

"Wow, I'm arrived in fairytale." Magnus said to himself and Clary couldn't help but smile. That was what she had thought too.

Magnus peeked his head into hallway, "Hey Sweetheart, when we're going to have dinner?"

Clary closed her door, "Let me take a bath first!"

"Okie dockie." Magnus said and closed his door too, soon Clary heard him off-key singing from other side of the wall and she could guess, he was bathing too.

She sighed, wishing more than anything that Jace would be there. Magically waiting for her again when she'd come from bathroom, but she knew he won't.

Though the memory of their night in that room made her miss him even more, it was comforting thought they had been together there then. They had that moment to remember.

Her eyes got wide. They had that moment then... And- they sure hadn't stopped to think of consequences of it.. Well, Jace had tried to say something, about waiting- or something.. She couldn't remember. Her only thought then had been to have him then and there. Her other thoughts were so clouded by her desire. They hadn't had any protection.

She bit her lower lip. Could she possibly be pregnant? She had never had regular periods, always on different times of the month and she never really thought of it much. She knew they'd come and go whenever it just happened to come and go.. And it's just been few days ago since they- well...

Though she also knew that it wasn't always so easy to get pregnant even if people tried to make it happen, so it's not 100% guaranteed she'd get preganat just like that.

She sighed, she should not think about this now. She would think about it if she would not have periods within few weeks.

Getting shower water running, she sighed again with small releaf when warmth wrapped around her, releasing some tension from her body. She closed her eyes, standing under running water for while without doing anything.

Then her fantasies took over her mind again and she imagined Jace coming to the bathroom, wearing nothing but towel around his waist, dropping it to the ground to join her in shower, his arms coming around her so strong and protective as always.

She smiled, wrapping her arms around herself, lost in her own fantasies.

If she just kept her eyes closed- he was there.

** I'm sorry you had to wait next chapter so long. To be honest with you, my motivation to this is fading. I love to write this and we're about half way through now, but it feels to me like you guys are losing your interest to it, and it makes me quite lazy to keep going. **

**But I promise I am going to make it all through, I have had this story in my mind for long time, I want it done. It just might be that the chapters will not be published so fast as they used to be. **

** Well I hope you enjoy this one, next will be coming up as soon as I get it done, and we'll see how strong the bond between Jace and Alec really is, and how far Maryse is willing to go for her children. Luke is also coming back to the story soon. **


	22. Spark of Crossroads

"Mom is going to kill us when she finds out." Alec sighed heavily.

Jace frowned and looked at Alec like worried of his brother's mental health, "You better realize we might not live so far to see what Maryse's reaction is. And even if we do survive, I doubt she's gonna beat hell out of you. It's my thing to get beaten. You wouldn't be in this mess without me."

Now Alec frowned. "How can you be so calm about it?"

Jace lifted eyebrow, "What you expect me to do? Run around in panic like headless chicken?... Sure, that would freak Sebastian out so well he'd never even think of coming back."

At any other situation, Alec would have found that funny, but even Jace's sarcastic sense of humor didn't fix things now. He wasn't as good as Jace, he knew it. And so did everyone else.

Jace was always the one with skills and abilities, quick thinking and fast reflexes. Yeah- Jace was the hero.

Without Jace, he'd be dead by now himself. And he had never told that their parents. He had watched while Maryse and Robert had yelled at Jace and treated him badly for weeks. And Jace didn't care. He had never asked a favor back, never accepted his thanks nor his gratitude. Somehow he felt need to make things even with his adopted brother, even Jace didn't see it same way.

When he had asked from Jace why he never corrected their parents idea of what had truly happened, Jace had just shrugged and said: "Why would I let them know that I got their own son just as messed up as I am? That- would hurt them more than thinking it's just me who's screwed up. They don't have much hope in me, so I'm not taking their hope for you away."

Alec stopped, taking hold of Jace's arm.

"Now what?" Jace asked and sighed then, "Look, you can turn back now. I'm not blaming you. You didn't have to come with me in the first place and-"

Out of moment of desperation and lack of time to think of other ways to shut him up, Alec kissed him.

Jace blinked few times in surprise mixed shock, but he didn't move away.

When Alec pulled back, he just frowned, finding easiest way out of awkward situation they were about to face:

"You really need to get that under control. Thank your luck it was me and not Sebastian. It'd be awful if he fell for you. We'd get bigger lunatic than I am in the family."

Alec rolled his eyes, "Would you listen?"

Jace turned around and kept walking, "Come along lover boy, we still have a fight to win. It'd be hell a lot easier if you didn't decide to get sentimental and tell me you're in love with me. Which- we both know, isn't anything new."

Alec took a rock from the ground and threw it on Jace's back, "Listen!"

Jace stopped and turned to look at him.

"Did you just throw me with a rock?"

"Yeah, and I will do it again if you don't stop joking around and listen!"

Jace held his hands up, "Fine, but make it quick. We need to get home before Sebastian finds us."

"I can walk and talk at the same time if you'd just pay attention to what I'm saying."

"Good, lets test that." Jace nodded and kept walking.

Alec blinked, then he run to catch up with his brother.

"Do you even know what we're up against?" He asked from Jace.

"Yeah, murderous lunatic, do I need to know something else?" Jace said.

"What if he has someone with him?"

"Well then it's damn good thing you're with me."

"And if there's many more than two?"

"Then we die fighting. Congratulations, welcome to hero world- it sucks doesn't it?" Jace said and opened the door to Lightwood's house.

"How can you be so calm about it?!" Alec asked.

Jace sighed and turned to look at Alec, "Because I have spent my whole life training to fight, and this is why I have trained for. I have got to live life I want to have- and that's what keeps me from freaking out. I know I'm damn good with all my training and I want to survive to get back into that life I have waiting for me. How about you focus on life you want to live after all this- it might just give you some courage to keep surviving... And try not to pounce on me again. It'd be awfully distracting."

"You had to bring that up again?"

"Yeah, you welcome."

Alec sighed. He didn't know how he put up with Jace sometimes, but maybe it was because he did love him.

He followed Jace upstairs to their bedrooms. Jace was looking for something from his closet.

Alec leaned against door frame, while watching him.

"What you're looking for?"

"Few things to keep you alive."

Alec frowned, "Bulletproof armor might do."

Jace chuckled, "Quite good, Sorry I don't have armor for you."

"Is it likely they will have guns?"

Jace stopped to think. "Yeah.. It's possible. But I doubt they will use them on us. Sebastian wants me dead. Gun would kill me instantly. He wants me to suffer. He won't shoot me. And if you stay out of his way, he won't shoot you either."

"Stay out of his way? You mean I should just let him kill you?!"

Jace closed the closet and leaned on it's door. "Not if I kill him first."

"Jace... "

"It's self defending until it's proved otherwise."

Alec swallowed and nodded. "Just don't leave me behind."

Jace shook his head, "I never will."

"What were you really looking from there?" Alec asked, eyeing Jace.

"Something to keep you alive with."

Alec narrowed his eyes, "You have a gun, don't you?"

Jace didn't say anything, neither his expression revealed anything, but Alec knew he was right.

"Jace..."

"I'm not murderer Alec. But if it's either your life for his- he will go."

"What if he's threatening you? You're not going to shoot him?"

"No."

Alec looked shocked, "Jace!"

"I won't, Alec. If I kill him, I'm not able to live with myself. I can barely live with that I saw my parents killed, if I'm the one to take his life- I better have damn good reason. And only reason I can possibly live with is that I did it to protect my family."

And that was that. Jace left down the stairs and shrugged his leather jacket on.

"Are you coming?"

Alec sighed, following his brother downstairs and then out of the house.

"Where we're going to find him?"

"He will find us. We're going to park. It's public place and if he has someone searching for me for him- they see me there and he'll come."

"He won't start a fight in park."

"True, which is why he's probably gonna lead us to his place."

Alec swallowed. "How we can beat him there?"

Jace smiled a bit, "Now you're starting to get into it."

"Not funny. How?"

Jace looked at Alec, "You know how to punch and kick, use that. And anything sharp goes as a weapon, anything long enough to go around throat will be good enough to chocking."

"This is insane..." Alec sighed.

"No kidding. I just kept telling you I'm lunatic." Jace laughed.

Alec looked at Jace, "You really are insane."

"Yep, I am. And that's why you love me."

"You're beginning to make it easier not to love you."

Jace laughed, "Well thanks. Nothing makes my day better than knowing I stand alone."

"You know you don't."

"In the end, I do." Jace said more seriously.

Alec just shook his head. He might not be as calm about possibility of dying as Jace was, but he would stand by his brother through it all. He won't leave his brother, just like Jace never left him.

A car slowed down and finally stopped, when window was pulled down, they saw older man looking at them through glasses.

"You're Jace, aren't you? Where's Clary?"

Jace narrowed his eyes, "You know her?"

The man chuckled, "I'm her godfather. I raised her."

"Luke." Jace nodded. He indicated Alec to follow and went to the car. "Clary's fine."

"Where is she?"

Jace thought about that for while. "Safe."

Luke frowned. "You can trust me Jace. I know about Morgensters more than you do."

"I doubt that."

"Valentine Morgenstern was my best friend for years until he got involved with drugs and many other things. I lost everything to him. Clary is his daughter, but Jocelyn left her to me because she wasn't sure back then if Clary was Valentine's or mine. She's not mine but I raised her as my own. I'm not gonna let Valentine take her from me too."

Jace nodded slowly, "Clary is in England."

"England? But-"

"Less you know, less they can use you to find her." Jace said.

Luke sighed, nodding. "What are you doing here then?"

"I'm here to face Sebastian."

"Hop in, I can help you."

Jace and Alec looked at each other and got in the car then.

Same time Clary was suffering heartbreaking nightmares. Magnus had woken up three times during the night for Clary's screaming and crying, calling out for Jace. In the end he had given up and took his own pillow and blanket and stayed in Clary's room. He thought of her like little baby now. She kept crying few times a night and he had to wake her up every time, turn lights on so she was able to see where she was, and he explained her that she was safe here.

Then started typical panicking over Jace, and every time Magnus kept telling her that Jace was coming back as soon as he could. Truth was- Magnus had no idea where Jace was and when he would come back if he even was coming back, but anything to keep Clary at least somehow from falling apart.

Early in next morning Magnus woke up for Aline shaking him.

He sit up, rubbing his eyes and went downstaris with her.

"This is better be good." He muttered.

"Jace's family is here." Aline said.

"Goodie. Did he come with them?"

"No. There's his mother, sister and little brother."

When Magnus arrived to living room where three Lightwoods were waiting, he knew from their expressions that they had nothing good to say. Max was sleeping on couch, Maryse sitting next to him and Isabelle standing behind her mother.

Maryse stood up, holding out a hand, "Maryse Lightwood."

"Magnus Bane. I'm babysitting Jace's Sweetheart. She's not taking his absence very well."

"How is she?" Maryse asked.

"Hanging on. Do you have any idea where that boy is?"

"We saw him at the airport. He's in New York. Alec has left with him."

"New York..." Magnus repeated thoughtfully. "I could go there help them if You babysit his Sweetheart from tearing herself to pieces."

"I am coming with you." Maryse said. "Isabelle is fine and capable young woman. I trust my daughter to be able to take care of her little brother and help Clary through the day."

"And night. She's screaming in her sleep. Nightmares.. Whatever you do- just don't tell her Jace is in danger."

Izzy nodded. "Anything else?"

Maryse kissed her daughter's forehead. "Keep all doors and windows locked and security system activated."

"I will... Bring my brothers safely back." Izzy said.

"I go change and we can go." Magnus said, going back upstairs.

Soon he and Maryse left back to airport and took next fly to New York.

"Are you sure about this?" Magnus asked, "That boy is quite little."

"Jace and Alec are my boys too. And they need me now more."

"Jace has never been just a boy." Magnus said. "He's living legend. He's fighter."

"He's my son!" Maryse snapped. "Jace has never been just a boy, but he is still my son. I raised him. I loved him when no one else did. I look after him even he's grown into this strong young man. He. Is. My. Son."

Magnus held his hands up. "He's lucky to have you. Lets go help your sons then."


	23. Spark of Herondales

Clary was pacing around her room when Isabelle came there.

By the look on Clary's face, she didn't dare to say anything edgy to the other girl.

Leaning against the door frame, Isabelle cleared her throat- Which got Clary jump.

"Isabelle! When did you come here? Where's Magnus? Is Ja-?"

"Calm down for goodness sake. Magnus left with my mom back to New York. They're going to help Jace whatever he's doing. And Alec is with Jace already. He left behind."

Clary was momentarily relieved that Jace wasn't alone. That his family was there to help him.

But then it hit her, the horror Jace had always carried with him. What if Sebastian killed his family in front of him? Jace would not be able to handle it. It would be even crueler than killing Jace himself.

Tears rolled down her cheeks befoe she even notice it.

"Hey... Clary, Jace will be fine. He's survivor."

"I need to go to him.. I need to go to him, he can't do this alone."

"He's not alone. And I tell you that if he'd know you talk about him like he was helpless little kid, he'd be pissed for days."

Clary was shaking, "What if I'm pregnant?"

Isabelle's mouth fell open. "You- What?!"

Clary blushed and looked down, but tears were still streaming down her cheeks.

"Clary! When did you find out? How far are you?"

"I Uhm- I don't know am I. I just realized that it's possibility... We didn't have- you know.."

"Sex with no protection is bad idea. You should know that much if you're with Jace."

Clary looked helplessly up to Isabelle, "Is it wrong I kind of think it's comforting if I am? He might die... And he-"

Isabelle hated crying, she was never really good at comforting hysterically sobbing girls either. But she knew what Clary meant, and she was afraid for her brother as well.. And there was always that- If Jace died, two respected families would be destroyed. Jace didn't know even himself, but he owned much more than just Wayland property. Jace's mother had been last Herondale standing, and Jace, being her only son, had every right to claim everything that belonged to his mother.

Jace couldn't possibly keep both families going, but he was still young, and in time he would most likely have own family. At least one of those family names would be passed down to his children.

Isabelle hugged Clary and said, "Look, Jace's faith in himself is like silk paper. It breaks with slightest touch. If we don't believe that he can do this... He can't. But we know him. He's strong and clever, and awfully annoying... He can do this. He will come back."

Clary nodded against her shoulder. "He will come back."

Isabelle pulled back, "But first we have to find out are you pregnant or not. It's not best kind of bomb to drop on him first thing he comes in from door after facing some murderous bastard."

And so Clary followed Isabelle downstairs and they went through all medical stuff there was in this manor. And as if by the order, there was three pregnancy tests. Clary remembered Aline telling her that Jace's mother had been wishing to have another child... They must have been trying it so hard... Well, she needed only one for now.

Isabelle took the test from closet and handed it to Clary, "Bathroom. I'm gonna make sure you're not cheating in this. If you're pregnant, it's my brothers baby you have. I will be here for his behalf."

Clary just nodded, taking the test from Isabelle's hand and turned to go to bathroom.

Jace examined carefully Luke's old shotgun and hunting knifes that was placed on Lukes kitchen table. They were sitting around the table and searching through anything useful for fight to face Sebastian.

"Valentine and I, we used to go hunt rabbits and such... I never went to forest again after he betrayed us all.." Luke said.

Alec seemed pale, but his eyes wandered sharply over the weapons and stopped to follow Jace's movements when Jace tested something if it worked or not or sharpened knifes.

Jace set down huge knife he had in his hand and looked at Luke. "It's like you're encouraging me to kill the guy?"

Luke shook his head and placed his hand on Jace's shoulder. Jace frowned, being slightly uncomrotable of being touched by someone he didn't trust entirely, but he didn't pull away. This was Clary's godfather. This man, would be part of his own family if he was capable of returning to Clary. He would have to learn to trust Luke. And he had a feeling- if Luke helped them through this- he would be able to trust the guy regardless.

"Jace, I knew your family. Your real family. Waylands."

Jace's eyes got wide and he sucked in his breath. He never expected anyone know his real family here. Not in New York.

"Or most likely, I knew your mother. She was over here one year to study, like au pair, and we got friends. I was in their wedding. You have your mothers eyes Jace."

Jace blinked and looked down, he somehow wished Alec would not be there to hear all this, though he wasn't sure why. He had nothing to hide from his brother.

"Jace." Luke said firmly, and he looked up.

Luke had friendly eyes, but there was worry and compassion in his expression, and something Jace didn't recognize from him.

"Do you know who murdered your parents?"

Jace shook his head.

"Valentine. That's why I am showing you all this. And I am coming with you. I will help you however you want, even if you want me to sit in car and just wait, ready to call help if something happens, but I am gonna be there. Valentine and his son had murdered countless people. I'm not encouraging you to murder, but to seek justice. And I want you to be prepared to defend yourself if they are trying to kill you... You have so much to live for Jonathan Wayland. And my god-daughter is one of those reasons."

Jace was speechless.

"You can get Sebastian and Valentine to jail for long time. Which would be right thing to do. Or you can let them know you're not afraid of them, you will fight back, and then sent them to jail. Your grandfather- your mother's father, did you ever meet him?"

Jace just shook his head.

Luke smiled, it was sad smile with hint of respect on it.

"Your grandfather was very good at hunting. When he came to get your mother from here back to England, your mother wanted to have dinner with him and all her friends. I was there. I met him, and he gave me very good advices. And he gave me this- "

Luke went to get small box. When he opened it- there was silver dagger with beautiful carved H on hilt.

Jace frowned, "Why he-"

Luke chuckled. "He was very generous man Jace. And he gave me this as thanks for keeping an eye on your mother while she was here, and to keep up my motivation to keep hunting. "it's noble hobby" he said to me... I think, this belongs to you now. It was your grandfathers. You should have it."

Jace swallowed, staring at the dagger, momentarily paralyzed to his place.

Alec cleared his throat and asked what Jace wasn't able to- "Why there's H?"

Luke smiled, "Herondale. Jace is not only last of Wayland family. He's legally last of Herondale family as well."

Jace closed his eyes and massaged his temples, his head was pounding like he had major hangover.

"Jace, you have a lot to live for."

"I have responsibility to live on." Jace said. His tone was harsh, exhausted.

Luke looked at him with compassion, handing the box to him. "When was last time you slept?"

Jace raised eyebrow, "Long time ago."

"Go to sleep. Your brother and I will be watching over and we wake you up if anything happens. You're not going to fight like that."

"But I'm-"

Luke shook his head and pointed to last bedroom at the end of the hall, "Sleep, now. That's Clary's room, you sleep there. I'm not going to watch her break her heart because of your stubborness to go fight tired to get yourself killed."

Jace opened his mouth to say something, then closed it and went to the room, stopping before going in and turned to look at Luke.

Luke raised eyebrow questioningly and Jace chuckled, "Can I have glass of water? I always wake up to go get one.."

Luke rolled his eyes and got up, taking out glass and filled it with water, bringing it to Jace.

"Now go to sleep."

Jace took the glass and nodded, "Thanks.."

Luke nodded back, "No problem."

Jace set the glass down to Clary's bedside table and crawled into the bed. Pillow had strong scent of her shampoo she used to her hair. He nuzzled his face to the pillow, curling up in ball like little child and squeezed his eyes closed.

He missed Clary. He missed her more than he realized he would, and that fear he would never see her again- made his heart shatter. He buried his face to the pillow to muffle miserable sound that escaped from his throat.

He knew he didn't deserve Clary, but he loved her too much to let go, and he would do everything he could just to see her once more.

Alec and Luke were still sitting around kitchen table.

"Do you honestly think we stand a chance against Sebastian?" Alec asked quietly.

Luke handed him coffee cup, which Alec took eagerly.

"I think Jace has extraordinary strong will to survive. He will fight his way through." Luke said thoughtfully.

Alec looked down to his cup, "He does... He has always had."

"Are you worried of losing him?"

Alec swallowed, then nodded, "He's my brother. My best friend."

"He's my god-daughters boyfriend." Luke said and Alec couldn't help but laugh.

Luke smiled, looking momentarily amused. "I should be lecturing him of take care of my little girl- here I am reparing him to fight."

Alec shook his head, laughing. "I don't think that lecturing him would change his methods to handle Clary."

Luke looked at Alec, with obviously pretended shocking expression. "What does that boy do to my little girl?"

Alec was almost chocking to his coffee and set his cup down for while. "You don't want to know..."

Luke laughed and shook his head, "No. I don't... But Clary's grown up now. They're adults. All I can hope for is that he makes her happy... Though I am going to kick his ass if he hurts her. She's still always going to be my god-daughter."

"I think- if Jace ever hurts her... He wants to be kicked." Alec said thoughfully. "I've seen Jace with lot of girls. Friends and girlfriends, and our sister... He has never been so protective over anyone else. Isabelle, maybe, and our mother.. But not any of his other girls. I guess he never let anyone so close he'd care... Clary just- brigns out the man in him we all knew he was. But no one else saw it until Clary came along."

Luke looked at the half closed door of Clary's bedroom where Jace was sleeping.

"If he's going to be anything like his own father... He's going to be best man for the job to keep Clary safe and happy."

Alec's phone beeped for tell them he got message.  
"What is it?" Luke asked.

"Mom is here... With some other guy- Magnus Bane."

Luke smiled, "Tell them to come here. It will be good for Jace to have more back up."

Alec shrugged and wrote the message back to his mother.

Luke stand up and went to coffee machine. "I'll make more coffee, I'm sure they're tired too."

Alec didn't say anything. He was thinking. His mind was racing more than it ever had.

He had always followed Jace to everywhere, despite risks Jace took with his life, but Jace had always danced his way through everything. And Alec couldn't help but think- was it that Jace was lucky, or was it that Jace had been chosen with special fate. Jace had lost everything- and now he had got everything back, just to be in danger to lose it all again.

If Alec died- his family would mourn for him. If Jace died... His family and Clary's family would mourn for him.. And the fate of two bloodlines only Jace was carrying within himself.

There was knock on the door and Luke went to open, Maryse and tall dark haired man came in.  
Maryse hugged Alec tight, then briefly introduced Magnus to Alec- who thought, it was creepy how Magnus eyed him like he was something to eat, but at the same time, it was secretly flattering.

When Magnus winked at him, he blushed, looking down to his coffee cup with slight smile he couldn't quite hide.

"Where's Jace?" Maryse asked.

Luke made a gesture to be quiet and lead Maryse to the door of Clary's room, opening it to let Maryse see Jace.

Maryse put her hand to her chest, blinking fer times and Luke could see tears filling her eyes.

"He's missing her." Maryse whispered.

Luke nodded slowly, he could tell Maryse had full job not to run to Jace and hold him.

"He slept like that when he came to us... He had his mothers pillow and blanket.. Nothing else from his last home."

Luke looked at Jace, and he could vividly imagine Jace being little boy with messy blonde hair, snuggling to his pillow and blanket. He smiled. He knew Jace would be best thing that ever happened to Clary. Jace was mix of everything Luke had admired. Waylands with their bravery and strength, Herondales with their pure and unconditional love and protectiveness that would take their life if it meant their beloved ones would be safe.

Jace made sleepy sound, turning to other side, nuzzling his face to the pillow, but he didn't wake up.

Maryse took few steps closer, going to pull the blanket to cover Jace better, and when Jace didn't wake up, she sit down next to him, stroking his blonde hair with motherly affection. Luke left them be and went back to kitchen.


	24. Spark of The End

_"Jace... Jace, wake up" _

_"Mmmh.. Not yet." Jace murmured sleepily, nuzzling his face to Clary's neck, hugging her tight. _

_She was so warm, her skin soft and her hair tickled his arms. He could have spent forever just holding her. _

_"Jace." Clary giggle, "You should get up." _

_"Nope.. I want to stay here with you." _

_"But if you go now, you come back to me sooner. Then you don't need to go again." _

_"Promise?"_

_She kissed his mouth, feather light. "I promise." _

_He smiled a little. "Just a moment.." _

_"Jace!"_

_He frowned, "Don't yell.. "_

_Then Clary suddenly pulled herself free, shaking him, "Jace, wake up!" _

Jace sit up, rubbing his eyes.

Alec was standing in front of him, "Finally. You damn sleepyhead, it took ten minutes to get you awake."

Jace sighed and stretched his arms. "Loose the violence with shaking me awake Alec or I'm not responsible if I hurt you." He sniffed, "Coffee... I want coffee." He stood up and went to kitchen.

"Good morning." Luke said. "Coffee?"

Jace nodded, scratching his head, his hair messy.

"Oooh, cutie. Good to see you always so dashing." Magnus's voice said and Jace was instantly awake.

"Magnus! Where's Clary?"

Magnus held his hands up. "Easy there tiger, she's with Isabelle and your baby brother in your super safe manor."

Alec came behind Jace and raised eyebrows, "Tiger?" He echoed.

Magnus waved his hand towards Jace, "He's yummy to look at."

Maryse made a sound of discomfort, and stood up, going to hug Jace.

Jace patted his mothers back and let go eagerly to get coffee cup Luke was offering to him.

They all sat down.

"So, what's the plan?" Magnus asked and everyone's attention was now on Jace.

Jace took a sip from his coffee, letting caffeine kick in to his nerves, waking him up.

"Does anyone know where Sebastian is?" He asked.

"I can guess, but that's all I can promise. I have no proof to that I'm right." Luke said.

"You know where Jocelyn is?" Jace asked.

Luke nodded, and Jace smiled. It was wicked smile that told others that Jace knew exactly how to work his way through. Smile Maryse had never really liked on her son's face. It always meant he would certainly be in danger.

Maryse had always thought, Jace had some sort of death wish. Maybe it was that deep down inside he felt like he should have gone with his parents, but it was more than that. Jace had always been so strong, so perfect. He had gone through everything holding his head high.

Still, in heart of a mother that Maryse had- she lovd Jace like he was her own. And even Jace was grown up man already, she had mothers instincts to protect her son.

"Jace" She said to get his attention, and his pure golden gaze turned to her, "What exactly will we do when we find Sebastian?"

Jace looked down to his cup and sipped last of his coffee. Luke took the cup, indicating towards coffee machine and he nodded. Soon he had full cup again.

"We'll get Jocelyn call him to come. If we're lucky, he comes alone. If he has company... Well that means work for you guys because I have only two hands and I doubt they will come on line so I can pile them down one after another."

Maryse nodded along with others.

"What about weapons?" Magnus asked.

"We use them only if we have to. There's at least knifes for everyone. Use it to protect your life or life of someone else. I have a gun... Luke, you will take your hunting shotgun and use it only if it's matter of life and death to save someone. Shooting on leg or arm, it will be enough to pay more time for us to struggle away from immidiate danger."

Luke nodded to signal that he understood.

Everyone were silent for while.

"Should we- make pairs?" Alec asked.

Jace raised eyebrow and Alec went on: "In fight, if we have pairs, we know someone we know is covering our back while we cover their back. We have to focus on the front."

Jace shrugged. "Do as you like, my attention goes on Sebastian. You and Magnus can be pair, I doubt he would mind."

Alec blushed and Magnus looked- for the first time since Jace could remember, slightly embarresed.

Maybe it was that Alec's mother was sitting right on opposite side of the table.

Jace stood up, "Are we ready?"

For his surprise, Maryse stood up next, her expression cold and business-like but her eyes burning with her motherly need to protect her family. "I'm ready."

Luke stood up and nodded, going to get his shotgun.

Alec and Magnus stood up last, changing supportive expressions and then they both nodded, focusing on Jace.

Jace handed them knifes from Lukes collection that he had sharpened before going to sleep. Maryse's hand shook slightly, but when she gripped the hild of the knife, her hold was steady and she nodded to Jace.

Magnus played with his knife in way that showed it wasn't his first time preparing to fight.

Alec was serious, but well focused.

When Luke came back with his gun, they all looked at each other. "Shall we go then?" He asked, taking his car keys.

Others nodded and they went out and hopped in to Luke's car.

Maryse and Luke were in front seats while Jace, Magnus and Alec went back.

Magnus leaned towards Jace despite Alec's curious expression.

"Make sure you make it through alive golden boy. You don't know what heartbreaking show your girl puts up every night screaming after you."

Jace closed his eyes as if the words hurt. "Is she alright?"

Magnus raised eyebrows, "Did you hear what I just said?"

"Yeah, but otherwise... I mean.. She haven't-.. Hurt herself?"

Magnus shook his head. "No. I kept her under constant suicide watch. I even stole her razors from her bathroom and all scissors from her desk. Aline is downstairs, too close to kitchen to sneak out with knifes. She should be fine. Isabelle is in suicide watch duty now and Aline in babysitting duty for Max.. Your girlfriend by the way- almost kicked Aline out when the chick was asking for you. Sweetheart holds on pretty tight on you."

For that, Jace smiled a bit, "That's my girl."

They stopped and Luke looked back for them. "Ready to go?"

"We're here?"

"We're here..."

They all got out of the car.

Jace tugged on sleeve of Maryse's jacket, "You go first, ring doorbell and ask if she's Clary's mother, pretend you're worried of where Clary and I have went and you wondered if she knew anything."

Maryse braced herself and nodded.

Her knife was hidden inside her leather boots and her black business-like dress and jacket fit her perfectly.

Jace and others waited behind car.

When they heard door open, Jace peeked to the door. Jocelyn sure hadn't expect anything and was now hugging Maryse, as if they were old friends.

"Of course, please come in. I don't know much but I suppose a little is better than nothing when it's our children we're talking about." Jocelyn said.

Jace pushed Alec forward, "Go."

Alec stood up, taking his phone out to carry on acting they weren't going to attack on anyone.

"Mom,"

Maryse smiled to Jocelyn. "This is my eldest. Alexander."

Jocelyn shook his hand.

"Mom. Isabelle called. Max wants a friend to come over. It's fine, right?"

Maryse nodded, "Of course."

"How many children you have?" Jocelyn asked.

Maryse smiled, "I have three own children and one adopted son."

"Jonathan Wayland." Jocelyn said, her voice suddenly colder.

Maryse frowned. "Yes... You know my son?"

"He's my daughter's boyfriend. Of course I know him."

Jace, Luke and Magnus stood up, coming behind Maryse and Alec.

"Not as well as you think you know."

"Jace!" Jocelyn shocked.

Alec moved fast to force Jocelyn's arms behind her back and dragged her in the house, others following. Luke coming in last and closing the door.

"Mother what-? Wayland.." Sebastian's voice reahed them and they turned to look back as the bedroom door opened from hallway.

Jace smiled sarcastically. "Well hello to you too. Please don't forget to say Hi to others as well."

Sebastian cracked his knuckles, "You're begging to be killed."

"If I want to die of boredom or shame, yes, I would have come to you sooner. I'm here to pay back for what your father did to my parents, and what you did to Clary."

Luke frowned, "What **Did** he do to Clary?"

Jace looked at Luke grimly, "He raped her."

Lukes eyes light up with pure anger and Jace made a note to himself that he won't ever give Luke change to feel so angry for him. Not that he was afraid of being hurt, but he had learn to respect Luke and look up to the guy now. He wouldn't bear to have Luke so angry for him. And Luke might be only one who shared the love for Clary with him.

Alec gave a shout while Jocelyn broke free, Maryse and Alec struggling to keep her away.

"Jace!" Maryse called out.

Jace didn't look away from Sebastian, knowing it might be his last move to make, and he indicated to Magnus to go help Alec and Maryse.

Luke and Jace stood side by side blocking Sebastian's way out.

"We can do this your way, or my way- which might hurt little less." Jace said. "I don't get kicks for torturing people."

Sebastian laughed, and he pulled out gun from his back pocket. "No. You get kicks of my sister screaming and moaning your name. Don't you?"

Jace stepped to protect Luke by the instinct, pushing Clary from his mind for now. At least she was safe, that's all he needed to know now. He wouldn't let Sebastian kill Clarys father. Or the man she loved like her father. It was one and the same for him.

Jace pulled out his own gun, "Don't think I didn't counted on that you'd try to make it easy for yourself. Shoot me, you have to shoot everyone in here. And they will be searched, and your will be in jain for rest of your life."

"You see- that's where you're wrong Wayland. I have killed hundrends of people, and here I am."

"Escaped from jail." Luke said through gritted teeth and pushed Jace behind himself, raising his shotgun towards Sebastian.

Sebastians black eyes sparkled. "Go on, you'll be in jail and your little red head will be on her own."

"No. I will be in jail, but I'm fine with that when I know- my daughter is with Jace. He will protect her, take care of her and love her. And I have clean papers within few years. Everyone can proof that I killed you for self defence and to protect Jace."

"Luke.. Don't.." Jace said, he couldn't bear the thought of-

Gun shot pierced the air and everyone went down by reflex.

Sebastian had shot right next to Lukes head.

Jace leaped forward, attacking on Sebastian before anyone could say or do anything. Sebastian's gun fell to the ground and Magnus picked it up, pointing it on Jocelyn, "No move to help your bad boy there or I shoot your wrists- you bleed to death faster than you can imagine."

Sebastian got Jace's gun and threw it away, smirking at him while piercing a dagger into Jace's thigh.

Jace grunted in pain, hitting Sebastian with his forehead to break Sebastian's nose before stumbling to his feet.

"Jace.." Luke said in concern.

"I'm fine.." Jace said, seeing Maryse look at him with fear and worry, he managed to smile at her, nodding to her for encouragement to keep Jocelyn out of the way.

"Jace!" Luke called, but too late.

Sebastian had gun in his hand and fired, bullet piercing through Jace's side. He doubled over, crying out in pain.  
"Jace!" Alec run acros the room for Jace, Luke pointing his gun to Sebastian to ready to shoot if Sebastian was going to try shoot Alec. Magnus nodded to Maryse who was looking at Jace with teary eyes. "Go. I can handle her."

Maryse looked at Magnus and he nodded again. "Go."

"Thank you.." She sobbed and went to her sons.

Sebastian laughed, pointing his gun to Magnus while Magnus pointed his gun to Jocelyn.

"You will pay for this." Luke said.

"What? For that?" Sebastian asked, nodding to Jace. "Why? He's fucking your little redhead anyway."

Luke shook his head, "No, you did. Jace- Jace is good man. He loves her. He makes her happy."

"Yeah, right, but he fucks her anyway."

"What obsession you have for Clary's sex life? She's grown up woman. She's free to have her own sex life. All I'm concerned about is that her boyfriend treat her well. And Jace does. So I'm just happy for her that she found someone to be happy with." Luke said.

Alec stood up, then Maryse, holding Jace's side and keeping him on his feet.

"Alec!" She cried.

Her son took Jace's arm and wrap it around his shoulders. "We got you." He said to Jace. "You're not standing alone."

Jace turned his head to Alec, saying something that no one else heard.

Even Sebastian who was pointing his gun to Jace again, seemed puzzled.

Alec nodded and took something from Jace's back pocket, giving old silver knife to Jace's hand.

"Do it." He said to Jace. "We catch you if you fall."

Jace looked at Alec, breathing hard. He had lost a lot of blood and he was dizzy.

Alec nodded at him.

Jace gripped tightly of the knife, turning to Sebastian.

Magnus hit Jocelyn to nose so her nose broke and she fell unconscious, pointing his gun to Sebastian as well as Luke, Jace pointing his Herondale dagger to Sebastian.

"Think twice now Sebby, if you shoot Jace, we shoot you from back and front. Do you want to risk it?" Magnus asked.

Sebastian made one glare at Magnus, and it was all Jace needed.

He bursted forward and hit his knife to Sebastians chest. Not through the heart, but through his lungs.

Sebastian gasped, with his last source of rage, pointing his gun to Jace but he wasn't there. When the gun fired- the bullet went through Maryse Lightwood and not Jace.

"Mom!" Alec and Jace called at the same time.

There was another gunshot, and Sebastian fell to the ground.

It was Magnus. He had shot Sebastian to his leg and it had caused his falling.

Alec catched his mother, Jace stumbling to his feet despite the pain on his side.

Maryse was trembling, taking ragged breaths.

"Call 911" Magnus said to Luke, kneeling down next to Alec.

"Let me.." He said and took small scissors, skillfully pulling pullet out of Maryse's stomach.

"It has broke her ribs, that's why it didn't reach her heart. His gun must have been old or not work right. It was weak shot."

"No... It was my gun." Jace said.

Magnus looked at him, "Perfect, you know how it's suppesed to work."

"The bullet shatters... "

Magnus looked at bullet he had picked out of Maryse. "Well it didn't."

Jace looked momentarily relieved, "I killed our mother..."

Alec looked at Jace, but Jace wasn't able to look at his brother.

"Alec I'm so sorry... I'm sorry.. "

"Jace.. What she did was her own will.. You didn't force her. You didn't kill her."

"Damn you two, she's not dead yet! If she get medical care right away, she might survive." Magnus said.

Jace held his bleeding side, making his way to the door.

"Take care of Clary... She owns.. Everything I had..." He said to Luke who was still on phone.

Luke looked at him in puzzlement and kept answering questions from emergency service.

Jace made his way out, barely conscious, he climbed to Lukes car and drove away. He couldn't bear it. He had murdered her mother. Well- adobtive mother but still.. it was his fault. He didn't realize the buss before it had hit Lukes car and he fell uncoscious. His last thought was image of red headed girl with golden eyes..._ Our daughter... Clary! _

His eyes flew open, everywhere was dark.. It was warm, like warm wind everywhere, but he was cold.

He tried to call for Clary, call her name, but his cries had no sound. He was dead.

** For all the heartbroken readers- I know! It's terrible. Jace is dead. **

**But hey, so was Clary and she's still in the game so keep your head up and come along with me through the story, okay? **

**The chapter is Spark of the End but I am telling you right here and right now- the last chapter ever will be "Spark of True Love." And there's still long way to go, so hang in there.**

** And someone asked me why every chapter is "Spark of- Something" **

**Well it's because the name of the chapter is kinda what includes the point of the chapter. And it's "Spark of" because this story is named of "Sparks" and I wanted to add something own to it and not just the name like this would be "The End" if I didn't name it "Spark of The End." If you don't like it- okay, I get it, but it's just my way to do it, so stay in your pants, it doesn't mean you have to like it. **

** So, thanks a lot for reading, thanks for lovely reviews and I hope you enjoy the story. We have long way to go. **

** Delicately Dark **

** XXX **


	25. Spark of Hope

"Clary! Clary, get up, we have to go. Now!" Isabelle shook Clary awake from her dreamless sleep. She pushed her messy red locks from her face and yawned.

"Izzy? What is it?" She asked sleepily.

"It's Jace. He's been taken to the hospital. And mom too." Isabelle said, throwing Clary's backbag to her bed. "Come on! We have to go!"

Clary blinked few times, news sinking in. "Is Jace alright?"

Isabelle rolled her eyes, "Great- you almost listen to me. He's been taken to the hospital, that's all I know. And mom too. So lets take comfort from that whatever happened to them- they are in good hands now."

Clary got up right away, quickly pulling jeans and Jace's black t-shirt on. It was little too big for her, but she loved to wear his shirts when she missed him so much.

She took her bag and followed Izzy downstairs.

Aline handed them lunch boxes and cups of coffee. "You can take these with you. You have long road ahead."

"Great. And you look after Max or I will sharpen my nails into you for rest of your life." Isabelle said, taking box and her coffee cup.

Clary felt bit guilty for shouting at Aline the other day and just smiled a little while taking her box and cup.

"Clary!" Isabelle called from door and Clary could see taxi waiting for them at the gate..

"Coming.." She said and hurried after Isabelle.

_"Jace!" _

_He could hear Clary's voice and sobbing echoing in endless darkness around him. He tried to call back to her, scream her name, but his silent cries carried nowhere. No one would hear them. _

_Then he saw her, like through blurred window. She was standing at the gates of Wayland manor, single red rose in her hand. She had black little dress on, black high heeled shoes that Isabelle had probably given to her. She was crying. Tears streaming down her face like waterfalls. She had colored her hair. It was darker now. Almost black. And her delicate arms were marked with so many harsh scars it was miracle she was alive. His heart hurt. Or would have hurt if it was beating. _

_"Clary!" He cried out her name, but she couldn't hear him, and he couldn't get to her. _

_She throwed the rose to other side of the gate, sobbing as she walked away from the manor. _

_Magnus's car was waiting for her and Magnus came out. _

_"Sweetheart... Are you sure you-" _

_"I don't ever want to come back here again. I will give the manor to museum. They will restore it and take care of it, honoring Wayland family which lived there.. I can't go back there Magnus. I can't... Not without him." _

_Magnus nodded, looking grim. "Hop in.. I take you to airport. Luke is there waiting for you when you get New York." _

_Clary just nodded, breaking into hopeless cry and climbed into the car, crying while Magnus drive away. _

_Jace was suddenly standing on the other side of the gate, rose laying on his feet. He picked it up and looked at the car driving off. _

_"Clary!"_

_The car stopped and for a moment of wild hope, Jace thought Clary had heard him and asked Magnus to stop. _

_But Magnus came out of the car, pulling backseat's door open and dragged Clary from the car. She had sliced her throat and blood was streaming down her body. She was dead. _

_"Clary!" Jace cried. "No.. No.. Don't. Don't die on me Clary.. Please.." _

_"Then fight Jace." She said. _

_Jace turned around, her bloody ghost was standing behind him. "Clary?" _

_"Fight Jace. Fight to live, to come back to me."_

_"But Clary.." _

_"Fight." She said. Single tear running down her cheek, her mouth forming the word over and over again but he couldn't hear her anymore, and finally she disappeared, and he was surrounded by darkness again. _

_"Clary!" _

"Clary!" Jace cried.

"He's responding!" Unfamiliar voice said right next to him, followed by many other voices.

"I found pulse. He's coming back to conscious."

"Get more AB- blood."

Jace couched. He tasted blood in his mouth.

Someone pressed his chest, pushing back to lay down. He tried to get hand off of him, try to tell them he couldn't breathe.

"Jonathan! Jonathan, listen to me. You are in lot of pain, we know that. You must stay still. We are in ambulance, your side has open wound. If you move, you will cause more bleeding and you may not survive. So hang on. We are soon in hospital, just stay still."

Jace was too dizzy to understand even half what he was told. His vision was getting blurry.

"Clary... Clar-"

"Jonathan, try to stay conscious for while."

Jace's eyes fell closed despite his try to stay awake.

"Jonathan, who's Clary?"

His eyes flew open at the sound of her name. He didn't understand the question, he only knew they were talking about Clary.

"Clary.."

"Yes, who is she?"

"I.. I.."

"Who is Clary?"

"I love her.:"

"Are you together? Jonathan? Jonathan! Is Clary your girlfriend?"

He nodded weakly. He was getting too tired to stay awake.

"Search his phone, find this Clary girl and let her know he's here." He heard someone say just before his willpower failed him and he fell unconscious.

When Isabelle and Clary came out of airport in New York, Magnus was there to pick them up with Maryse's car.

"How is he?" Clary asked.

"Well Sweetheart, they have been trying to reach you. Jace was found dead, but they got him back in last minute. He's stubborn one to stay alive. Someone up there likes him a lot."

Clary's heart seemed to skip a beat or two. "H-he.. He w-was... Dead?"

Tears filled her eyes and Magnus quickly carry on. "He's stable now. He went through surgery and he's stable. Doctors say he will make it. He has long recovery ahead- but he'll live. Luke is in hospital with Alec. Maryse Lightwood got shot while protecting Jace and her state is critical but so far she's alive."

"Mom is..." Isabelle was the one with teary eyes now. "And Jace.."

"Hop in girlies, we're not getting there if you don't move."

Clary and Isabelle climbed in and closed the car door, both of them sitting there in silence, trying to hold back their tears.

When Magnus stopped in front of the hospital, telling them to go ahead while he'd find free spot to leave the car.

Nurse told them where they'd find Jace and Maryse and they practically run to the elevator and through the hall, finding Luke and Alec sitting there with coffee cups in their hands.

Alec set his cup down and run to his sister when he saw them. Luke following example but waited 'till Clary run to him, throwing her arms around his neck.

"Thank god you're alright." Luke muttered against her shoulder, squeezing her in his arms.

Clary sobbed, "H-how's Jace?"

Luke sighed softly, slowly letting go of Clary and handed her tissue to vipe her tears.

"He's stable."

"Can I see him?"

Luke shook his head. "He needs rest. He woke up for while after his surgery but he fell back to sleep. He must be exhausted. Nurse said we should go home and come back tomorrow, but we waited here 'till you could come."

"I.. I want t-to see him." Clary sobbed.

"I know." Luke said and took hold of her hand, "Come. I know who to ask for help. Jace's doctor is here. I'm sure she'll let you see him for a moment. Jace's first words when he got conscious was calling your name. He has been calling for you all the time when he's awake."

Clary's heart hurt. She should have been there for him.

" , Clary is here. She wishes to see Jonathan."

Clary was momentarily puzzled of how this brown haired young woman was somehow very familiar to her.

Then she remembered- Simon Lewis. This was Simon's sister. Right, he had mentioned she was studying to become a doctor. Simon and Clary had gone to same school together, and occasionally stopped to chat, but they didn't knew each other very well.

"Jonathan is-"

"Jace. He prefers to be called Jace." Clary said.

smiled faintly, "Of course. Jace- is sleeping, and I highly suggest that so will you. You can come back tomorrow and-"

Clary's eyes filled with tears again. "I have to see him! He needs me!"

Luke patted her shoulder, "No doubt that he does. Calm down Clary."

took her glasses and put them in her pocket. "Fine. 15 minutes. And try not to wake him up."

Clary nodded, sniffling and sobbing as she was lead to Jace's room.

"He had gun shot wound on his left side, he had lost a lot of blood. Then he crashed into a buss with another car. He hit his head pretty badly. He was dead when-"

Clary didn't listen anymore. She went closer and took Jace's hand into her own.

He had always had so warm and strong hands. Now his skin was cold.

"Jace... Jace I'm here. I love you... You'll get better, and we'll go home. You and me. We can go anywhere. I don't care. I just want you back.. I need you Jace. I need you to stay strong and get well."

"Clary, don't-"

Jace made tired sound, giving angry look to Clary and took hold of Clary's shoulder, "Come on, let him sleep."

But Jace gripped on Clary's hand, his eyes opening, their perfect golden gaze fixing on Clary and he smiled.

"Clary.."

Clary shook the doctor off of her and she sat down to the edge of his bed, careful not to harm him.

"Hey handsome." She said, trying to blink away her tears. Now they were happy tears. He was alive. And he was going to be fine. She run her fingers through his golden hair, caressing his face.

"I love you." Jace said. His voice was exhausted and ragged, but his eyes were shining like little kids on Christmas morning when he saw her. His heartbeats raced slightly and seemed everything else but pleased.

"Clary, it's time to go. He needs to rest."

"No!" Jace gripped tighter of Clary's hand, "I want her to stay."

"Jace I promise I will be right back here in morning... I promise."

"No. No, Clary don't.. Stay here with me.. Stay, please.."

Luke cleared his throat. "What damage it would do if you give Clary a bed next to his and she'd be here for him?"

"He needs to rest. And does he look like he's resting now?"

"No. But he looks happy now and he is still laying down there, taking it easy. Jace, if you have Clary here on bed next to yours, will you rest?"

"I will." Jace nodded, "I will.. I just.. Don't make her go."

Clary held his hand and turned to look at the doctor. "And.. I need to stay here. I need to be here for him."

Luke looked at the doctor. "What harm can it do? Try it at least for now. If you think Clarys presence is not good for him then I take her home tomorrow, but let them try it out. We have all been young and in love sometimes. Try to understand it from their point of view."

looked at Jace and Clary sharply. "Fine, we will test this just for tonight. I don't promise anything more. We well see tomorrow if Clary can stay."

Jace smiled, pulling Clary closer and kissed her, running his hand through her messy red hair.

"Clary." Luke said and she pulled away from Jace for while, "Yes?"

Luke indicated her to come with him, chuckling at Jace's expression and said: "I will let you have her in a minute."

Jace let go of Clary's hand, watching her go with Luke in hallway while doctor went to get bed for Clary.

"Clary. What you did- running away like that, I-"

"I know.. I shouldn't have. I'm sorry... But I'm alright, and Jace-"

"Jace, almost died Clary. He's not a prince in shiny armor, he's a human. I know you two want to survive on your own but when it comes to something like this- something so dangerous it's threatening your life, or his, you can't disappear like that! I was sick of worry and so was Jace's family. You are grown up, yes. But being grown up doesn't mean you just leave your family like that!"

Clary looked down to her feet. She knew Luke was right, and he had right to be angry. She looked at him and tried hard not to cry. "I'm sorry Luke."

Luke sighed, "Will you promise not to do something like this again?"

She nodded, "I promise."

Luke smiled a bit and patted her shoulder, "Go on then. Before your stubborn boyfriend climbs out of his bed to come and get you."

Clary couldn't help but smile, "He might do just that... Hey Luke."

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

Luke just nodded. "No problem. I'll come tomorrow after work to see how you guys are doing."

Clary smiled a bit, she knew Luke must have had hard and he had worked non-stop. He must be exhausted.  
"Luke... I love you."

That made Luke smile and he ruffled Clary's hair, making her laugh.  
"Love you too. See you tomorrow."

"Drive safely!"

Luke rolled his eyes. "Your boyfriend smashed my car to a buss. I'm taking taxi."

"He'll pay it back."

"I'm not taking your boyfriend's money."

"No, Luke, he will. It's not like he can't effort it."

Luke just shrugged and left. Clary watched him go until returning to Jace.

was checking on him and there was hospital bed next to his.

"And no climbing to each others beds. Jace has just survived through surgery." She said to Clary.

"I just want to be near him. I'm fine in here." Clary said, sitting down to her own bed.

left, dimming the light in room so only light came from Jace's bedside table.

He reached out his hand for her, and she took it.

"Jace..."

"Yeah?"

"You scared me... I was so afraid I had lost you for good.. I was so angry for you just leaving me like that.."

He sighed, "I know.. Can you forgive me? Clary I.. I love you. So god damn much I can't live without you."

Clary stroke his golden hair soothingly, "I'm not leaving you. And I'm not angry for you anymore. I just hope you'll never do things like that again."

He squeezed her hand, "I promise."

Clary leaned over to gently kiss his lips. He tasted salt and blood and Jace. She closed her eyes for while, thanking god or whatever it was responsible for his survival.

"Clary? Are you alright?"

She took a deep breath. "Jace.. We have to talk about something."

He frowned, "What is it? What's wrong?"

She swallowed, "Jace... I may- or may not, be pregnant. I'll need to make a test to be sure... I might not.. Or.."

Jace looked at her eyes wide.

"Jace? Please say something... We can't even be sure, I might not be. I just wanted you to know it's possible and-"

"Clary."

"Yeah?"

He touched her lips, pulling her down to kiss him, murmuring against her lips "I love you. Be pregnant or not, I'll always love you, and I'll be here for you- whatever we'll have to face. I'll be here for you."


	26. Spark of New Life

When Luke came to the hospital next day, he found Clary sitting on her bed in hospital's paper dress. She looked so happy. Her hand squeezing Jace's hand.

He looked at her like she was a miracle. Like he had never seen anything so precious in his life.

He saw Jace's doctor and went to stop her. "Hey, excuse me, why is Clary wearing a paperdress?"

"Didn't she tell you?" Doctor Lewis asked.  
"Tell me what?"

"She needs to take pregnancy test. Apparently our young, so very much in love being couple has never heard of protection."

Luke sighed. He wasn't too surprised, but he wasn't pleased either. And doctor's attitude towards Jace and Clary in general- made him in bad mood.

He shook his head and went to Jace's room.

"Luke!" Clary greeted, looking as happy as ever.

Luke crossed his arms to his chest, "I swear to god Clary you have never brought me so much trouble than you do now. I'd say your reckless boyfriend is bad incluence on you but then again- he's reckless and keep you mostly safe, so I guess I can't complain. You could have got worse."

"You heard about the test..." Clary guessed and Luke raised eyebrow, like asking "you think?"

"Look, it's not Jace's fault! It.. It was mine." Clary said, trying to sound as calm and sweet as possible and Luke knew this was something Clary would not give up on without fight. If he started lecturing to Jace, Clary would shoot right back at him.

She was prepared for speech, but not for Jace. For herself.

Jace chuckled, wincing in pain. "I guess that takes two anyway...It's okay Clary.. I deserve my part."

Clary stroke his hair tenderly to try ease his pain, "No.. " She blushed, "You did.. try to- you know.."

Jace took a deep breath, mostly to calm himself from pain.

Luke cleared his throat, "Okay, I got the point. And what's been done it's done and that's it. I'm sure doctor Bad-Mood has already lectured to you and I have expressed my opinion so that's it."

"Doctor Bad-Mood?" Clary asked in amusement.

Luke shrugged. "She seems to have something against you two. Or just people in general."

"She's jealous." Jace said, his tone as light and sarcastic as it could be through his discomfort and pain.

"Oh I bet she is." Clary rolled her eyes, trying not to laugh.

Luke raised his eyebrows, "Could be. Maybe she never was young and in love"

"Were you?" Clary asked curiously.

Despite the life Clary had with Luke, only real family she had, she had never known much of Lukes past. Sure Luke had told her stories of his own childhood and what he had done with his friends, what kind of jobs he have had and so on, but he never mentioned his love life, and he had never seem to be too interested of finding anyone. Clary knew why- because of her. Luke had so focused on raising her that he hadn't have much time to himself. But by all means he seemed happy with the life he had.

Luke shrugged, "More or less."

Jace was suddenly striked by memory of Luke telling him Jocelyn left Clary to Luke because she wasn't sure if Clary was actually Luke's daughter. He frowned, watching the older man. Luke must have loved Clary's mother once. And she had chose to follow Valentine and left. Luke must have been hurt, but he had still managed to push his pain aside and raise Clary as his own, even she was daughter of a man who took everything from him.

By that moment, Jace's respect towards Luke raised in many levels.

He wished he could one day be as good man as Luke was.

A nurse came into the room to get Clary for her test.

She looked at Jace, who squeezed her hand for encouragement and then to Luke who just nodded.

She left with the nurse and Jace and Luke was left alone.

"Go ahead... Yell at me." Jace said.

"Why should I yell at you?"

Jace raised eyebrow, "Yeah, just for the fact that it's my fault if Clary's pregnant?"

Luke shook his head, "You said it yourself. It takes two. You are grown up adults Jace, it's not my business to lecture you. I'm sure you knew what you were doing. And she seems happy. If she's pregnant, then there's few options for her and we'll be there for her whatever she chooses. I will lecture you only if you leave her to go through this on her own, because it's your responsibility as well."

"I won't.. I won't leave her. She's gonna get rid of me only if she wants to break it up. I can't leave her Luke. I'm in love with her. Only if she's not happy with me... I wouldn't force her to stay."

Luke nodded. "Then I'm not lecturing to you. You're good kid Jace. What I do strongly recommend to you though, is to be more careful. You are hell a lot more reckless than it's good for yourself or to anyone else."

Jace smiled a bit, slight amusement in Lukes voice eased his guilt as well.

"Yeah... I can try. No promises on that." He said.

Luke shook his head in amusement, "I thought so."

Jace frowned then, "How's Maryse?"

"She's stable. She'll be fine."

Luke could see Jace relax, and he could only imagine that Jace had been released from huge amount of stress for knowing that he wasn't responsible for killing his adoptive mother.

"Did you also know that this Magnus Bane guy asked your brother out?" Luke asked, trying to lighten the athmosphare.

Jace raised his eyebrows, "So soon? Wow... They didn't waste time."

"Best one to talk Wayland."

Jace chuckled, "Point taken."

Lukes phone ring and Jace clicked his tongue, "No, no. You should turn those things off when you come here."

"Will you break this too?" Luke asked. His tone wasn't blaming or angry, but Jace got pale.

"Luke... I will pay it back." He said.

Luke turned his phone off and shook his head. "I'll be fine, I don't need your money."

"No, Luke- I know you might not need it, but I broke your car. It can't be fixed. I'm not saying that I pay it because I just happen to be able to. I'm saying I pay it back because I feel guilty and I want to make things right. I'll get you new car."

"I don't like new cars much."

"Well then we find you older one but make sure it's fine so it won't break next day."

Luke nodded, "Sounds good to me."

Clary was pacing around the room. She was nervous for the results. The test she and Izzy had found, was probably broken and Izzy had told her to make another one just to be sure.

"How long has it been?" The nurse asked.

"W-what?" Clary stuttered nervourly.

"How long has it been? Since you had sex."

Clary blushed, looking down to her feet, trying to count days.

"A-about a week."

Nurse shrugged. "Your test might come out negative still even if you are pregnant. It's little tricky to tell so soon. Do you feel different?"

Clary shrugged, "We h-have had q-quite stressing t-time lately..."

Nurse smiled, it was gentle smile and Clary liked this nurse. She wasn't much older than 30 probably, blonde, kind looking woman. "I hear your boyfriend survived quite amazingly."

Clary tried to smile back, tears filling her eyes and she tried to blink them away.

Nurse handed her a tissue, "I was there when he woke up from his surgery. He kept asking for you all the time. I'm telling you now young lady, hold on to him. Good men are hard to come by."

Clary smiled a bit, "Yeah.. I know."

"And here we go." The nurse said, examining her results.

"How long did you say it was since you-"

"About a week.. W-why? I-is something wrong?"

"No." Nurse smiled gently, "Nothing is wrong. Congratulations, you're pregnant. I still recommed you to come take new test after a week or two and we will schedule the meetings then for original checks for your baby and discuss of your options."

Clary sucked her breath in, staring at the older woman eyes wide. "I... I am p-pregnant?"

"So this test says. But as I told you, I recommend another test later. Though I am quite sure this is the result we will have then too but I have to follow protocol and so I am supposed to recommend another test for you."

Clary was speechless. She had secretly hope for this when she had been so worried of Jace and feared she'd never see him again- but now... She didn't know what to think.

"I.. Can I go now?"

Nurse nodded, "You may go. But Clary... I might suggest to take it slowly and not drop the bomb to your boyfriend out of no where. Shock won't do good for him."

"H-he knows a-already that.. T-that this might happen.."

"Good, then I'm sure you can discuss of this together and make your decisions then."

Clary just nodded and wandered back to Jace's room.

Luke was sitting on chair next to Jace's bed and they were casually killing time by chatting. They both looked up when she came.

Luke stood up. "Clary?"

Jace struggled to sit up but winced in pain and gave up trying, leaning back to his pillows.

"Clary, what is it?"

She swallowed, looking at them both one after another, her gaze locking with Jace's and she bit her lower lip. She couldn't say it.. She just nodded. But Jace seemed to understand her and his golden gaze wondered down to her stomach and back to her eyes, holding his hand out to her and reached out to take it.

Jace pulled her to sit down to the edge of his bed and she leaned carefully into his embrace.

Luke raised eyebrow questioningly and Jace formed silent words to other man: "She's pregnant."

Luke sighed softly, patting Clary's back while Jace held her, stroking her hair.

"Clary.."

She sobbed, raising her teary gaze to Luke. "A-are you mad?"

Luke shook his head, keeping his hand Clary's shoulder. "I'm not mad. You're grown up woman Clary, you make your own decisions. But I want you to know I will still always be here for you. I'll help you, however you will need it."

She smiled, throwing her arms around him and sobbed into his shoulder.

Luke patted her back. "Things will work out. You're not alone. Neither of you. We're one big family."

Clary looked at Luke and then Jace, who nodded in agreement.

They were family. Her family. Family she never had before besides Luke. The thought made her smile.

**My apologies of last chapter, it wiped away the doctor's name and I didn't notice it until now. I should have know to check it through but it was late so I just published it so you guys can have it. **

** And huge thanks for all reviews, makes me really happy to know you like the story. **

** 'till next time then. **

** Delicately Dark **

** XXX**


	27. Spark of Secrets

**Couple months later...**

Under the circumstances of Jace and Maryse both being in slow recovery process, and Clary being pregnant with Jace's child, Luke had suggested for Jace moving in to live with him and Clary.

Now Maryse won't have to worry about Jace, and she would focus on her own recovery, and Robert won't have to worry of both of them with Jace being taken care of by Luke.

Jace grew stronger by the day, his motivation to get better was probably raised with his knowledge of Clary's state.

Clary, on the other hand, had discovered herself in whole new light.

After Jace's few weeks of reassurence that he didn't find her disgusting or think any less of her now that she would grow "fat", she had become surpringly confident of herself... Along with her rolling hormons.

As soon as Jace was well enough, she would snuggle up to him anytime- anywhere, willing to practically rip his clothes off.

Luke had decided to ignore this part of Clary's behavior, but Jace could tell Luke was uncomfortable with Clary's overwhelming desire for him, and so Jace had often used his charm to talk Clary over to behave herself with giving her a promise he would do anything she wanted later when it was better time.

Mostly to make things up to Luke, Jace worked in bookstore few days a week to give Luke some own time, but he refused to get paid for his job. He said that it was payment enough for him that Luke fed him and let him stay in the house.

Now they all sat around kitchen table, eating pasta and meat-sauce Clary had cooked. She was determented to learn to cook and take care of everything, with her dream now to take care of her own precious family.

"Is it too salty? I tried not to make it too salty, but I-"

"It's delicious." Jace and Luke said at the same time and Clary smiled like an angel. Happy of her successfully made dinner.

Jace and Luke exhanced looks, they both had learned not to judge her cookings, because in worst case- it meant she would cry next two hours in bathroom, refusing to let either of them in until Jace would try and seduce her out of there. And then it meant Jace won't get much sleep that night.

Luke almost pity him sometimes when Jace was six a clock in kitchen, watching coffee machine to make coffee and he probably drunk more coffee than it was even good for him during those days.

But Luke had never once heard Jace complain, even if he was exhausted and tired, almost falling asleep standing on his feet. Instead, Jace swallowed everything Clary made for him, smiling for her thankfully even if the food wasn't good. He never denied anything from her, and by Clary's happy mood, Luke could only be happy of that his god-daughter had found so good guy.

By now Clary's cookins had got better, and Jace ate everything he could get- probably to fill-in the energy loss of his lack of sleep. And that pleased Clary to see her boyfriend liked her cookings.

Luke cleared his throat and Jace and Clary turned to look at him.

"Jace, are you free tonight?" He asked, directing question to Jace even they both knew it was up to Clary was Jace free or not.

Jace blinked, turning to look at Clary.

"What you mean?" Clary asked.

Luke chuckled, "There's few packages arrived, new books for the store. I would appreciate some help to organize the books in store."

"That won't take long if there's two of us." Jace said. "I'd be back in couple of hours."

Clary shrugged, "Okay."

"Yeah, I'll come help you." Jace nodded to Luke.

Luke nodded and they finished their dinner, Luke washing dishes while Jace took a moment to make sure Clary was fine with being alone couple of hours.

"She will make you pay it for her." Luke said with colorless voice when he and Jace went to the store.

"I know" Jace sighed softly. "She's watching movies now to kill time. I told her to call if she needs help... We better get to work right away."

"Jace you know you don't have to spoil her all the time. She's just used to that you give her everything."

Jace shrugged, ripping one package open and examening the books inside. "Yeah well... I want to make her happy."

"You're gonna burn yourself out before that baby is born." Luke said seriously. "Clary is big girl Jace, she can handle herself. Sure she might be little over sensitive now, but she's still same girl she was before she got pregnant. She's not stupid. If you just explain to her that you need some more rest and not just... Please her all the time. She'd understand. She loves you. And it doesn't mean she couldn't be still close to you."

Jace sighed, organizing the books one after another, piling them for Luke to take them to their right place.

"I know that. But so far I'm fine. Maybe little tired but- it's nothing new. I rather stay up all night and take care of her than be somewhere else without her, struggling through my own nightmares. At least I'm happy with her even if I'm tired."

Luke looked at Jace. "What you're going to do when that baby is born?"

"Take care of both of them."

"And when you're going to take care of yourself?"

"Clary takes care of me just fine. She feeds me and makes me happy. It's more than I could even ask for. Besides- she's probably not going to act like this through out her whole pregnancy. It's just some- weird hormonal time period. She'll get herself back together and clear her head."

Luke shook his head in slight disbelief, "You're unbelievable..."

Jace smiled with slight sarcasm in his voice, "I knew you're jealous of me dashing looks and personality"

Luke just laughed.

Jace's phone ring.

"There you go. She's already missing you back." Luke said.

"Nope. It's Alec." Jace said and asnwered: "What's up?"

Luke saw Jace roll his eyes, "Alec, do I look like Magnus Bane-dictionary? By now- you know the guy way better than I do. You date him, I'm just a friend... Yeah, yeah, we'll be there. See you."

Luke raised eyebrows, "What was that all about?"

Jace put his phone away and kept working, "Magnus's birthday party is soon."

"Oh yeah, I got invited too." Luke smiled a bit.

"Alec wants big party for him... Oh crap." Jace sighed and looked at Luke, "We better hope they realize to have something alcohol free for Clary."

"We can buy something on our way there and you give it to Alec so Clary won't realize it." Luke said simply.

Jace nodded, "Good point."

They heard doorbell ring for Luke's house.

"Who could that be?" Luke asked.

"I can go check." Jace said, going through the door in backroom that lead to Luke's house.

"Are you back?" Clary asked in surprise. "I just invited Izzy to watch movies with me. She's bringing us candy."

Jace smiled, "No, just came to check you're fine." He kissed her forehead and went back to the store area.

"It's Izzy. Clary invited her to watch movies with her."

Luke seemed surprised, but also pleased. "That's good."

Jace nodded, ripping another package open and piled up the boks for Luke, "Yep. I told you she's fine."

They had almost got everything done when Izzy run to the store, "Jace! Jace get your ass upstairs, like right now!"

Jace blinked, "What's wrong?"

"She's crying! She's- so hysterical."

Jace raised eyebrow, "let me guess- you're watching Titanic? Again?"

Izzy shrugged innocently.

Jace rolled his eyes. "Idiot! I told you hundred times that no movies with sad endings!" He sighed and left, making his way to Luke's house and found Clary crying heartbreaking cry against the pillow she was hugging.

"Hey..." Jace sit down next to her and wrapped her arms around her, holding her tight.

She nuzzled her face to his chest and sobbed.

"I guess.. Izzy thinks I'm crazy.."

Jace sighed, making note to himself to keep another speech for his sister while he stroked Clary's hair soothingly.

"No she doesn't. You're not crazy. Izzy is. Most people cry at the end of Titanic, trust me. You're not crazy or weird.. Izzy's bit weird. She doesn't cry for movies, no matter how sad."

Clary looked up at him. "Do you cry?"

Jace frowned, "Not really.. No. But you know why I don't cry... Not for movies, or anything like this." He kissed her forehead, squeezing her gently. "I'd cry for you... Here." He took the remotor from Clary and jumped the movie back to the scene where Jack and Rose where in the reeling of Titanic.

He held Clary tight and feed her with candy, eventually calming her down. He stroke her hair until she was lulled into peaceful sleep. He lifted her up into his arms and carried her in their bed, wrapping blanket around her before going back to Luke and Izzy.

"Isabelle." Jace said with so sweet voice it was almost deadly.

That was the mark for Izzy to pay attention. And well.

"Yes?"

Jace crossed his arms to his chest. "What did I tell you when you first came here to have movie night with Clary?"

"No sad movies..."

"Yeah, and what Titanic is?"

"It's romantic!"

"It's sad Isabelle! You might be cold hearted man eater but Clary's not. She's actually pretty sensitive on her own, and now that's highened since she's pregnant. She gets sad when she sees sad movies. She's generally caring and she relates to others feelings. She can't watch sad movies now- or this is what happens. She gets sad and she'll cry."

"Well I'm sorry! she said she wanted to watch romantic films and I thought- Titanic is romantic." Izzy explained.

"Not really." Luke said- somewhat unhelpfully, gaining deadly glare from Isabelle.

Jace nodded, "Yeah, it's not actually so romantic as people claims it to be."

Isabelle sighed, "Fine, no more sad movies."

"Great, look for comedies next time." Jace said and turned to look at Luke. "Anything else I can help with?"

Luke shook his head. "We're pretty much done here. Go get some sleep Jace."

"No need to tell me twice." Jace said and left.

Izzy crossed her arms to her chest. "He's so damn grown up now."

Luke chuckled, "He actually is grown up."

"You're not helping." Izzy sighed, "He's my annoyingly reckless big brother... Now he's just annoying."

"Oh no.. I don't think Jace will ever be grown up enough to give up on his recklessness. He's more responsible now, but he's still definitely little like Peter Pan, always little spark in his eye and ready to action."

Izzy laughed. "That he is.. Well, I'm going home. See you around." She said and marched off.

Luke shook his head in amusement. Jace was one thing- his family was the other. But still Luke was growing fond of Lightwoods. Maybe part of him accepted the fact Clary's unborn child had united them all. He didn't need to look out for her alone anymore, but his new freedom was still strange to him. And lately Jace's behavior- as good as it had been, worried him. Jace won't be much help to Clary if he passed out of exhaustion.

Luke made his mind to talk to Jace again of this situation tomorrow. Checking everything and securing the locks, Luke went back home as well.

Sounds from bathroom told him that Jace was in shower so he went to kitchen to get something to snack with. On his way there, something catch his attention that wasn't quite right.

He knew Jace ate strong pain killers occasionally, but the glass next to medicine bottle didn't look like water glass. There was brownish circle in bottom of the glass. He sniffed. It smelled strongly like alcohol.

With heavy sigh, Luke washed the glass and searched his kitchen closets.

He was shocked and disappointed of realizing that Jace kept himself going with mix of alcohol and medicines, and since he couldn't find the bottle anywhere, Luke took all medicines and hid them in his own room. Sooner or later Jace would have to come ask them from him and he'd get the boy confess why he did this to himself. Jace wouldn't go far without pain killers. Especially when he worked so hard.

Jace came out of bathroom and just nodded to Luke as he passed by.

"Good night."

"Night." Luke answered, sounding more harsh than he even meant to.

Jace stopped at the door of Clary's room.

"You okay?" He asked.

Luke shrugged, "Just tired."

Jace nodded, "I know the feeling. See you in a morning."

"Yeah.. See you."

Jace frowned slightly. Luke had usually always been really friendly to him. But he shrugged it off, believing in older man's word that it was tiredness and he climbed to the bed next to Clary- who snuggled up against his chest, making soft sleepy sound but didn't wake up. Jace wrapped his arm around her and fell asleep instantly.


	28. Spark of Passion

Clary opened her eyes and peeked through her lashes, smiling as she saw Jace sleeping next to her.

She sit up and looked down at him, having sudden urge to wake him up- she leaned down, letting her hair fall all over his face. Then she shook her head a little, letting her hair tickle his face.

He sneezed and opened his eyes sleepily.

Clary giggled, finding him really adorable like this.

"Good morning!"

Jace groaned tiredly and pulled her lay down, nuzzling his face to crook of her neck. "Not yet..."

Clary just kept giggling. He so, so adorable when he had just awaken, his golden eyes half open sleepily, and his hair bright golden mess.

"Jaaace... It's time to wake up."

"No... It's Saturday... I'm free."

Clary climbed to sit on his lap and rested her hands to his chest. "Wake up!"

Jace sighed softly, raising eyebrow at her teasingly, "Or you will do something very wicked to me while I fall back to sleep?"

Clary sucked in her breath, "Don't suggest it if you don't mean it Mister."

Jace smiled and sit up, leaning back into his arms, brushing his lips along her neck "Well since you're already on your place, why not?"

Clary shivered. It wasn't often nowadays that Jace seemed to be in mood before she was, and she sure used every chance could get. He was like a drug to her.

She slide her hand down his chest and hard abs that seemed to stand out more now under his smooth skin, little uncertainly tugging at his pants. Her hands were shaking and butterflies were having jungle party in her stomach.

His eyes darkened and he reached his hand out to pull her night gown off, his eyes wandering along her body and she felt hint of uncertainty again. And as if he had read her thoughts, he tugged a lock of her hair behind her ear, his voice low and hoarse when he said: "You're beautiful."

Clary shuddered, blushed even. She had made a move on his so often now that it made tingle all over when Jace was the one to make first move. He still wanted her. Actually wanted her.

"Jace... I-"

He blinked, his golden gaze locking into her eyes. "What do you want me to do?"

She bit her lower lip, blushing at the hoarseness of his voice and intense golden gaze that went right through her soul.

"I.. I want you."

He smiled slowly, brushing his lips against hers, whispering huskily: "How you want me?"

Clary shifted on his lap, his arms wrapping around her to keep her still and she made helpless, impatient sound.

Jace trailed kisses down her neck, nipping her skin lightly, making her nerves hypersensitive. She was trembling.

"Jace..."

"Hm?"

"I want.. "

He shushed her with a kiss, murmuring between kisses, "I know."

Then she was dizzily aware of his hands on her waist, suddenly she was pinned down under him, finding herself naked, her hands shaking slightly with excitement while she reached to pull down his pants.

She looked up at him, his lovely golden hair, his eyes- which seemed dancing like orbs of golden fire, his lean, muscled body. Desire washed over her like wild fire and she reached to wrap her arms around him. Then he was there, pressing into her, his low moans mixing with hers. She wrapped her legs around his waist, her fingernails digging into his shoulder blades, causing his groan against her mouth.

Before she even realized, she was on top of him again. He was sitting up, his arms wrapped tightly around her, his fingers caressing her back, his lips wandering along her neck. She was whimpering and moaning his name, holding on to him so tight she might have been worried of hurting him if she wasn't so lost in her own desire.

Luke was more than glad when doorbell ring and he got something else to think about- or listen to, than loud noises coming from Clary's bedroom, though he knew he couldn't let anyone into the house before those two would stop- which might not be anytime soon.

Opening the door, he saw Jocelyn Morgenstern.

His mouth fell open. She was thin, almost like skeleton now, as if she hadn't eat anything for weeks, months maybe. He hair was a dirty mess, her clothes hanging on her, dirty and torn.

"Luke.." She sounded pleading.

"What are you doing here?" Luke asked.

Jocelyn sobbed, "He's dead... My son, he's dead.. Valentine won't help me anymore... Luke I'm lost. I was lost. I shouldn't have left, I should have listen to you.. We could have had wonderful life with our baby girl."

Luke held his hand up, "Don't. I told you then not to come cry to me when he hurts you. And Clary- she's not yours anymore. She has her own family now, and you are not part of it, and I'm not letting you ruin it for her."

"New family?... You mean that Wayland boy?"

Luke thought for while, was it even safe to let Jocelyn know Clary was pregnant.

Loud cry wandered to their ears from Lukes house and he closed his eyes, shaking his head.

Jocelyn looked at him curiously. "What... Was that?"

Luke sighed, and before he could say more, they heard loud and clear Clary crying out Jace's name.

Jocelyn gasped. "Oh my god." Then she laughed.

Luke couldn't help but laugh as well. "Yeah... The Wayland boy..."

"Quite a boy.." Jocelyn muttered.

Luke cleared his throat. For a moment it felt like years back, Jocelyn being her own sweet self. Being a woman she loved.

But he knew what she was like now. Valentine had ruined every piece of goodness Jocelyn had left in her when she left Clary to Luke. Drugs. Jocelyn had used them as long as she had been with Valentine. And no doubt she had sold her body to Valentine, and whoever he had told her to. Sudden disgust filled his mind of though- had Jocelyn let her son use her as well? Since it didn't seem to touch her anyhow that Sebastian had raped Clary.

"Jocelyn you have to go. You're not welcome here."

"Luke please... Please. I don't have any money, I lost my apartment, I don't know what to do.. Luke please.."

Luke sighed, handing Jocelyn some money. "Go find yourself some cheap hotel and buy yourself something to eat. Call to social services and find out if anyone can help you. And don't come back here again."

"Luke..."

"Jocelyn, don't."

"You're so, so good man Luke."

"Go."

Jocelyn sobbed, biting her lower lip which was trembling. "I'll go... Thank you."

Luke just nodded silently, watching her go. Loud noises from inside the house making him sigh again. Those two were impossibly annoying when they really got into it.

Suddenly he made his mind and locked the door behind him.

"Jocelyn wait!"

She stopped, her green eyes surprised and hopeful, "Yes?"

Luke handed her his jacket, "Come on, I take you to breakfast."

Jocelyn sucked her breath in, throwing her arms around his neck and holding him tight.

"Luke..."

Luke blinked few times, patting her back awkwardly and lightly pushed her off.

"Lets go."

Jocelyn nodded, blinking fast to hold back her tears.

Jace took deep breath, his heartbeats were slowly calming down.

Clary was resting her head against his chest, her warm breath tickling his skin.

"I love you Jace."

She had said it probably hundred times already during last couple hours but he smiled still, running his fingers through her hair. "I love you too."

"Do you think Luke will be mad at us?"

"Us?" Jace poked her lightly, "You're the louder one."

Clary blushed, "It's not my fault you're so good."

"Hm, I know."

"I think we need a shower." She said, resting her chin to his chest and peeked at him through her lashes.

Jace raised eyebrow, "you think?"

She giggled, nuzzling her nose to his chest. "Stop it!"

"What? What did I do now?"

"Don't look at me like that."

Jace chuckled, "I can't help it. You're way too irresistible."

"Hmm, you had to?"

"What?"

Clary looked up at him, biting her lower lip.

Jace laughed, getting up. "Come and get it Redhead."

Clary blushed, following him to bathroom eagerly.

**I want to take little moment to thank for all reviews again! You people are wonderful! **

**This chapter probably wasn't necessary but I needed to bring Jocelyn back, and it would have been tricky with my future plans to fit that part in so I made quick chapter to include that- and give more perspective of Clary's hormonal overdose during her pregnancy. It's not gonna stay like this long so enjoy it while you can. **


End file.
